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As an amusing aside, next on my docket is “Burgers Will Make It Better.” Somehow, I doubt that will be the resolution of this story.
You have fewer than a thousand words and you’re using some of them on chapter headings. Well, it’s certainly daring.
Wow. I honestly wish this had ended in burgers. You got my hopes up with Chapter 6; I thought Fluttershy might deconstruct the whole thing. But no, it just kept going on with the… I guess this was supposed to be satire? Kind of hard to be clever when you’re devoting maybe a hundred words to each installment. Sorry, this just didn’t work for me.
You have fewer than a thousand words and you’re using some of them on chapter headings. Well, it’s certainly daring.
Wow. I honestly wish this had ended in burgers. You got my hopes up with Chapter 6; I thought Fluttershy might deconstruct the whole thing. But no, it just kept going on with the… I guess this was supposed to be satire? Kind of hard to be clever when you’re devoting maybe a hundred words to each installment. Sorry, this just didn’t work for me.
I... actually quite liked this, though I honestly couldn't form a cohesive sentence to explain why.
I just did.
I just did.
Genre: Random comedy
Thoughts: This is brilliant and hilarious. Few cliches are left unskewered. My biggest complaint is that some of the middle chapters don't quite match the sheer insanity of the earliest and latest ones. I loved the first chapter's stated resolution that the sad character's sadness had abated, and I craved something like that in the chapters that didn't offer as clear of a wrap-up.
...so do I get my interludes now? :trollestia:
Tier: Top contender
Thoughts: This is brilliant and hilarious. Few cliches are left unskewered. My biggest complaint is that some of the middle chapters don't quite match the sheer insanity of the earliest and latest ones. I loved the first chapter's stated resolution that the sad character's sadness had abated, and I craved something like that in the chapters that didn't offer as clear of a wrap-up.
...so do I get my interludes now? :trollestia:
Tier: Top contender
TD was sad.
He was sad because he doesn’t really like random character destruction comedy, and this did not manage to bypass that barrier.
So he put the story at the bottom of his ballot.
He was still kind of sad, though.
He was sad because he doesn’t really like random character destruction comedy, and this did not manage to bypass that barrier.
So he put the story at the bottom of his ballot.
He was still kind of sad, though.
More seriously, this really just didn't do it for me. The meta in the final section in particular just felt meh, but really, very little of the story did anything for me, and a lot of it felt a bit tired. Really, the only part that amused me was the Fluttershy bit, where the subversion actually... subverted things.
I'm not sure who did this. But I can definitely tell you have some sense of comedic timing.
I'm not sure who did this. But I can definitely tell you have some sense of comedic timing.
Upon completion of Chapter One: "Uh, what?"
Chapter Two: "Okay, I think I understand what's going on here..."
Chapter Three: "Um, maybe not."
Well, I finished, and somehow I ended up more confused than before. I detect elements of irony and satire, but... what was the point of this?
I suppose if there's anything for me to say, it's that Pinkie Pie's chapter was the my favorite.
Chapter Two: "Okay, I think I understand what's going on here..."
Chapter Three: "Um, maybe not."
Well, I finished, and somehow I ended up more confused than before. I detect elements of irony and satire, but... what was the point of this?
I suppose if there's anything for me to say, it's that Pinkie Pie's chapter was the my favorite.
That was a nice read on the whole, and I’m especially grateful to you for changing character every 100 words or so. I think if you'd rambled on the whole minific on the same character, it would've been much less effective.
The Pinkie Pie part left me wondering. If anypony in Ponyville is an immortal alicorn, “They thought about how they would someday visit each other's graves centuries from now, while shedding a nostalgic tear.” doesn't make sense at all.
Welp. I suppose making sense is not the point of this story.
The Fluttershy part was definitely the best. 'grats for pulling that out.
I must admit, I was pretty curious to know what the others thought. That added further spice.
Decently, I can't place this atop my slate, but neither can I place it way down. So it landed right in the middle.
The Pinkie Pie part left me wondering. If anypony in Ponyville is an immortal alicorn, “They thought about how they would someday visit each other's graves centuries from now, while shedding a nostalgic tear.” doesn't make sense at all.
Welp. I suppose making sense is not the point of this story.
The Fluttershy part was definitely the best. 'grats for pulling that out.
I must admit, I was pretty curious to know what the others thought. That added further spice.
Decently, I can't place this atop my slate, but neither can I place it way down. So it landed right in the middle.
Trollfic, but fun trollfic. I doubt there's much to offer in the way of feedback here due to the nature of [Random].
I hope you're serious about those bonus chapters, because this is currently easily in the top half of my ballot. (Hopefully obvious reminder: Don't post the bonus material until after it won't disqualify you.) Does what it sets out to do and stays fresh with the continual switch-ups. Some of the sections didn't land for me but the ones that did are enough to elevate this.
Tier: Strong
I hope you're serious about those bonus chapters, because this is currently easily in the top half of my ballot. (Hopefully obvious reminder: Don't post the bonus material until after it won't disqualify you.) Does what it sets out to do and stays fresh with the continual switch-ups. Some of the sections didn't land for me but the ones that did are enough to elevate this.
Tier: Strong
>>horizon
Regrettably(?), I think it's unlikely. On Discord the distaste for this one is super-high, and there are at least three ponies who have said it occupies last place on their slate.
I'd have ranked it higher if it weren't for the last section. It was just a little bit too much and the premise went stale by then.
It's actually well-written and funny in places, I just didn't enjoy it. This is one of those situations where a little finesse in one place or another could have made all the difference (although I've no idea where that finesse would need to be).
Regrettably(?), I think it's unlikely. On Discord the distaste for this one is super-high, and there are at least three ponies who have said it occupies last place on their slate.
I'd have ranked it higher if it weren't for the last section. It was just a little bit too much and the premise went stale by then.
It's actually well-written and funny in places, I just didn't enjoy it. This is one of those situations where a little finesse in one place or another could have made all the difference (although I've no idea where that finesse would need to be).
Gotta go:
With >>horizon on this one--I giggled pretty much constantly throughout and will rank the story accordingly high.
Mike
With >>horizon on this one--I giggled pretty much constantly throughout and will rank the story accordingly high.
Mike
whew, looks like I won't have to do any extra work.
I was drunk. idea based on something Cold in Gardez said weeks ago in the discord channel, which hopefully he doesn't remember.
I watched people getting on SaintAbsol's case over this, and couldn't say anything. do you really think the author of this fic is gonna be offended over it? actually I felt worse from people trying to defend me than the insult itself. don't fight each other.
I was drunk. idea based on something Cold in Gardez said weeks ago in the discord channel, which hopefully he doesn't remember.
I watched people getting on SaintAbsol's case over this, and couldn't say anything. do you really think the author of this fic is gonna be offended over it? actually I felt worse from people trying to defend me than the insult itself. don't fight each other.
>>Trick_Question
>>Haze
A question:
About the Discord chat--if I were to log in there now, would I be able to go back and see comments folks had made about stories in this round or previous rounds? Or are those comments lost beyond recall at this point?
Mike, Often Confused About Technology
>>Haze
A question:
About the Discord chat--if I were to log in there now, would I be able to go back and see comments folks had made about stories in this round or previous rounds? Or are those comments lost beyond recall at this point?
Mike, Often Confused About Technology
>>Baal Bunny
Technically you could, but there's literally about three thousand messages a day in the chat, and Discord doesn't have a search function (yet), so you'd have to manually scroll through all the conversation for hours upon hours.
Technically you could, but there's literally about three thousand messages a day in the chat, and Discord doesn't have a search function (yet), so you'd have to manually scroll through all the conversation for hours upon hours.
Post by
Murmurpunk
, deleted
>>Exuno
Eep!
Then I'll just here and now officially resign myself to not being able to keep up. :)
Mike Again
Eep!
Then I'll just here and now officially resign myself to not being able to keep up. :)
Mike Again
>>Haze
You're in luck! I don't remember.
But this should've been in the finals anyway. I'm sad it wasn't on my slate.
You're in luck! I don't remember.
But this should've been in the finals anyway. I'm sad it wasn't on my slate.
>>Haze
I'd still like to see more of this, or a cleaned-up version of it, or something. This shoulda been a contender.
I'd still like to see more of this, or a cleaned-up version of it, or something. This shoulda been a contender.