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Friendship 101
Twilight Velvet pressed her ear to the door, wondering if anyone had heard her knocking. Five more minutes and she’d let her back hooves have a go at it.
“Can I help you?”
She turned around and found a wizened unicorn stallion, his neck bent under the weight of a lengthy beard and a thick set of spectacles. She put on her best business smile, the one reserved for her agent and publisher. “Yes, I’m here for a parent teacher conference. Could you let me in to the school, please?”
The stallion scratched his chin. “Parent… what? The fall term doesn’t start for ten weeks, Miss…”
“Twilight Velvet, and I’m well aware of the date.” The school handbook materialized next to her, opened to the section on student-teacher conduct. “It says right here that a parent can request an emergency conference with their child’s teacher at any time, and that the teacher needs to honor that request within a week. I filed my request six days and twenty three hours ago, so here I am. There’s nothing in here about waiting for the school year to start.”
The stallion stepped closer and leaned towards the book until his glasses nearly touched it. “Huh… Has that always been there?”
Twilight Velvet just kept smiling. “I’d like to see Princess Celestia, please.”
The stallion raised his eyebrows. “The Princess… Your that Twilight’s parent or legal guardian?”
“I prefer the term mother.”
He nodded. “Right, right. I guess I can take you in… I doubt anypony’s keeping up with the mail this early on.”
His horn lit, the door’s lock clicked. “Ha, I can’t wait to hear what ol’ Task Master says when he hears I met our star student’s mother before him. Maybe he’ll finally get that coronary he keeps whining about in the teacher’s lounge.”
Twilight Velvet followed him through the open door and into a barely-lit interior. Cool, dry air rose up from the polished stone floors, scented ever so slightly with chalk dust. In the dim light she could just make out the sweeping marble staircase that dominated the main hall. Seeing it again added some genuine mirth to her smile; poor little Twilight Sparkle had nearly walked right into it on her way to her entrance exam, thanks to the book she’d been trying to read at the time. The whole school had been packed then, a wall-to-wall circus of parents chasing presumed school officials with their prospective student in tow. Today the place was empty. What would it be like on Twilight Sparkle’s first day? Would the older students be kind? What about the ones in her own class, assuming there were any? There wasn’t anything in the handbook about being the Princess’s personal protégé, an oversight that she intended to squeeze for all it was worth.
“How’s young Twilight liking her summer break?” Her guide was leading her to a set of doors to the left of the stairs.
Twilight Velvet blinked at the question. “Oh, she’s spending it just how she wants to: studying, studying, and more studying.”
“That’s a good filly! I was the same way… just couldn’t get enough books.”
“What subject do you teach, sir?”
“History. I’ve been alive for most of it, you see.” He looked back at her, his grin youthful.
She chuckled. “And here I assumed a strapping young thing like you would be over the hoofball team.”
“Ah to be young again… I’ll never forget the day I got my cutie mark… the thrill, the excitement, the cheers from my friends… But here we are, the head-princess’s office, as we like to call it.”
The door before them was unremarkable, save for its being two heads taller than its neighbors. A small plaque just above eye level read Headmistress Celestia.
“And she’ll be in here?”
He nodded. “The summer sun is up, and the nobility are out hunting for royal favor and proverbial back-scratches. Where would you go to avoid them?”
“The principal’s office in a locked up school.”
“Very good, my dear.”
The door creaked open as soon as Twilight Velvet knocked on it, and a surprised but sufficiently regal “ooh, who’s there?” escaped through the gap.
She pushed open the door and bowed, catching only a glimpse of an overly tall desk laden with paperwork as she did so. “Good morning, Princess Celestia. I’m sorry for disturbing you like this, but I’m afraid I need to meet with you for an emergency parent-teacher conference.”
Princess Celestia chuckled. “Welcome, Mrs… Velvet, isn’t it? What brings you here in the middle of summer break?”
Twilight Velvet rose, her business smile still in full force. Princess Celestia looked surprisingly mundane, seated behind a desk with paperwork before her and framed awards on the wall behind her. Everything was larger than normal, of course; the desk reached Twilight Velvet’s nose. Equating this oversized office pony with the shining beacon of Princesshood she’d seen during the summer sun celebration took some effort. “I’m here about my daughter, Twilight Sparkle.”
A smile crossed Princess Celestia’s face, and not the kind Twilight Velvet expected; she’d seen and given her share of friendly façades to push a book deal through, but this looked different. The Princess actually looked happy about being accosted by a meddling, busybody parent. “Please, have a seat. I hope Twilight isn’t too nervous, especially when she still has so much time off ahead of her.”
The chair wasn’t like anything Twilight Velvet had seen before. It looked more like a series of oversized, padded steps, each one as wide as a seat cushion. The lowest one was at a normal chair’s height, and the next two taller still. She climbed up the second step, which put her on level with Princess Celestia. The topmost step, which was just a few inches taller, would’ve been perfect for a foal to sit eye to eye with the Princess of Equestria. “This is an… interesting chair.”
“One of my former students made it for me, a little something to help students and parents see me for what I am in this office: a teacher. Now what’s so urgent that you needed to invoke the ‘emergency conference’ rule before Twilight’s even been through her first day?”
“I’ll get right to the point, your majesty. Twilight’s cute-ceañera is this Friday at one, and I’d very much like for you to make an appearance.”
The warmth drained out of Princess Celestia’s smile; now she was all business. “While I’m flattered that you’d invite me, I’m afraid I can’t come. Surely you understand how many graduations, parties, and social events parents routinely ask me to attend. I don’t have time to go to them all, and it would hardly be fair to select just a few. I can’t make an exception, not even for Twilight Sparkle.”
Twilight Velvet expected this. She’d expected this from the moment she’d suggested this crazy idea to her husband a week ago. “I can respect that, Princess, so long as you understand why I’m asking. Will you give me that, at least? I won’t waste your time.”
Princess Celestia nodded. “Go on.”
“Twilight earned her cutie mark during her entrance exam for your school, well after her public school let out for the summer. The handful of acquaintances she has are either on vacation, including Princess Cadence, or have some other excuse to not come to the ‘weird kid’s’ party, the kid that always has her nose in a book.”
Princess Celestia’s smile vanished. “I don’t understand.”
“You’ve spent five minutes with my daughter, Princess. You’ve seen that she’s very talented, but you haven’t seen how she spends every waking moment studying. I wanted her to come to your school so she’d meet some fillies and colts her age that she’d actually identify with… maybe that can still happen with her being your personal student, but it isn’t about to happen by Friday, and believe me I’ve gone down the entire first-year class roster and sent out invitations…”
Twilight Velvet leaned forward, her hooves on the desk. “My daughter doesn’t have friends, Princess Celestia. She doesn’t even expect anyone to show up to her cute-ceañera, and what’s worse is she doesn’t care! She’s perfectly happy to sit around eating cake with her parents and big brother because she doesn’t know what having actual friends is like. She deserves better than a cute-ceañera with no friends, even if she doesn’t expect it. What could show her the value of healthy social interaction more than seeing it demonstrated by the Princess she idolizes?”
Princess Celestia opened her mouth slightly, as if she was voicing the uncomfortable silence that hung in the air for seconds on end. “Of course she deserves better… and during her studies with me, I’ll ensure—”
“That sounds suspiciously like an exception to me, Princess, just like when you publicly stated you’d take a single filly under your wing for private lessons. You’re already going to be present for plenty of her life events simply because you’re her teacher, so why not this one? She’ll have plenty of birthdays and other celebrations, but only one cute-ceañera.”
A frown crossed Princess Celestia’s face, which made Twilight Velvet’s smile all the harder to maintain. “Tell me, Twilight Velvet, what do you do for a living? Are you a corporate executive, or a lawyer?”
“I write children’s books. Publishing is a lot more cut-throat than most ponies suspect.”
“And what if Friday comes and goes without me? Would your next book be the tale of the solar tyrant that steals the dreams of little fillies?”
Twilight Velvet’s smile turned into a gasp. “This isn’t blackmail or politics, your highness.”
“Would you pull Twilight Sparkle out of my school?”
“Not if she’s going to be happy here, and nothing in the whole world would make her happier than learning from you directly.”
A quick knocking rattled the door, and a guard’s deep voice came through the gap. “Princess Celestia? Your afternoon court is set to begin in five minutes.”
Twilight Velvet dove across the desk and grabbed one of the Princess’s hooves. “Please, Princess. This isn’t for me, and I swear nopony ever has to know about it.”
Princess Celestia extracted herself from her embrace and stood. “I can’t promise you anything, but…”
Twilight Velvet nodded. “Consider it. That’s all I ask.”
Twilight Velvet stared down at the party favors lined up on the kitchen counter; twenty little bags filled with hats, noise makers, balloons, and a generous amount of star-shaped confetti. Her hoof tapped out seconds in time with the clock on the wall. In another minute everyone she’d invited would officially be half an hour late. “Stupid other parents… stupid public school… stupid scheduling conflicts… that’s what the Princess is going call it: a scheduling conflict. I should’ve just put invitations on lamp posts.”
Night Light nudged the nearest party favor with his hoof. He looked at her with a cautious yet optimistic smile she knew well, the same one she gifted to each of her book’s dashing heroes. “She was the longest of long shots, dear… but we can still make the afternoon special. What if we go out instead? We could let Twilight pick a restaurant… maybe stop by her favorite book store…”
Shining Armor sighed, the short crop of his mane barely visible over the back of the couch. A book on military strategy floated over his reclining form. “Dad, we did that last week after she aced her entrance exam! She’s probably rereading her new teleportation book right now, that’s why she hasn’t noticed what time it is. Can’t I just go upstairs and get her? We can have the cake, and sing, and—”
Twilight Velvet swiped her foreleg across the kitchen counter, scattering the party favors everywhere across the floor. She stomped into the front room and focused her magic on the streamers hanging from the ceiling. One by one, the decorations came down and joined the party favors on the floor. “Not another word, either of you! Just… let me think.”
“Mom—”
“I said let me think!”
“Mom—“
She whirled around and glared at her son, an adolescent stallion already as big as she was, but not so big that he could escape cowering under her fiery gaze. “What, Shining Armor? What?”
He curled into a ball and held a spare cushion up as a shield. “There’s… um… there’s somepony outside… looks important.”
Night Light reached the front window first, and his tail stuck straight out when he did. “D-dear, you didn’t say anything… threatening to Princess Celestia, did you?”
Twilight Velvet gasped. “What? Of course not!”
“Shining Armor, did you commit some horrible crime that you’d like to tell us about?”
Shining Armor jumped off the couch and joined them at the window. “Are you crazy? I’ve got a week left before I go to the acad—whoa.”
Twilight Velvet pressed her nose to the glass. A chariot was parked on their front lawn, and no less than ten royal guards, were lining up next to it. “Go get Twilight.”
“Huh?”
“Go get your little sister! Tell her study time is over, the guests are here! Night Light, could you wait by the door while I… um… pick up the mess I made?”
Shining Armor ran for the stairs, while Night Light headed for the kitchen. “I’ll clean up, dear. If the royal guard is coming to arrest you for Princess harassment, who am I to stand in their way?”
She rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue. “You’d better hope they do, because if they don’t my pillow’s got a date with your f—”
The sound of the doorbell made her jump. The soft clang of metal on metal, the sweet music she’d been fantasizing about since sending out invitations was finally calling out to her. “J-just a minute! Be right there!”
“How about that, they’re not just breaking the door down.”
She shot Night Light one last glare and marched to the front door. Twilight ran down the staircase and nearly collided with her. “There’s ponies here to see me? Really?”
Shining Armor came up behind her, laughing. “Really, Twily.”
Twilight Velvet smiled. “Let’s just remember to be friendly and accepting, no matter what they look like, okay honey?”
Young Twilight gave a vigorous nod. “I will, mom. I promise!”
Twilight Velvet took a deep breath, her eyes fixed on the new cutie mark on her daughter’s flank. “Why don’t you open the door, honey?”
Young Twilight’s horn glowed purple, and the front door swung open. Two royal guards in full armor stood in the doorway, their stern expressions as friendly and inviting as a brick wall.
Young Twilight gave a seconds-long gasp. “Are… are you here for my party?”
Twilight Velvet bit her lip. They’d better be. If this was some sort of sick prank, no jury would ever convict her.
The guard on the left spoke, his voice as level and stern as his expression. “Is the residence of one Twilight Sparkle, personal student of Princess Celestia?”
Young Twilight gave her mother a brief glance before nodding. “Yeah… That’s me.”
“And is this the date and time of her cute-ceañera?”
Young Twilight tilted her head slightly. “Yes…”
Both of the guards pulled off their helmets and grinned. “Phew, we’re at the right place! Can we please come to your party, Miss Twilight?”
Young Twilight smiled. “Sure! That’s okay, right Mom?”
Twilight Velvet beckoned them inside. “I hope you’re all in the mood for cake.”
Twelve royal guards filed through door in two straight lights, removing their helmets as they did so. In seconds the quiet house was filled with conversation and calls for the special filly to tell them her cutie mark story.
Twilight Velvet took a deep breath, exhaling a week upon week of worry in the process. Little Twilight had some guests at her party, and she didn’t care that they were muscle-bound stallions clad armor.
“Did somepony say cake?”
The room went silent, and Twilight Sparkle gasped. “Is… Is that—“
Princess Celestia ducked through the entryway. “Good afternoon, Twilight Sparkle.”
“You came to my cute-ceañera! Oh thank you, Princess!”
Princess Celestia smiled at Twilight Velvet. “Your cute-ceañera is today? How convenient! I actually came to begin your private lessons early, but that can wait until we’ve celebrated, don’t you think?”
Young Twilight’s smile faltered for just a moment, at least until she looked at the roomful of guests. “Oh wow, I guess that can wait… Since we have guests and everything.”
“Wonderful.”
An hour later, the party was still in full swing. Twilight Velvet sat at the kitchen table, watching guard ponies tossing her daughter in the air amid repeated choruses of For She’s a Jolly Good Pony. Her attention wandered to the other side of the room, were two other guards had her son backed into a corner.
“—hear you’re shipping off to the academy.”
Shining Armor saluted. “Y-yes, Sir!”
“Think you’ve got what it takes to be a Royal Guard, eh? Maybe a lieutenant?”
“Yes, Sir!”
The guard shook his head. “Wrong! You’d better aim higher than that. If you want to last a month in the academy, you’d better be aiming for captain of the guard, got that?”
Shining Armor’s eyes went wide. “C-captain of the guard?”
“Say it!”
“I-I want to be the captain of the guard… Captain Shining Armor.”
Both guards chanted in unison. “I can’t hear you!”
“Captain Shining Armor!”
Princess Celestia slipped through the room, passing groups of guards trying on party hats and testing noise makers, and joined Twilight Velvet at the table. “I’m sorry we were late.”
Twilight Velvet laughed. “Late? I wish you’d told me you were really coming, but… thank you. Thank you so much. This means the world to Twilight.”
A glass of lemonade rose to Princess Celestia’s lips. “I just gave a command lecture on the origin and historical significance of cutie marks. I’m not sure I’ll get out of here with my voice intact.”
“That’s my filly. She’ll take every bit of knowledge you give her… but I hope you see the other side now, too, the filly that… doesn’t really get what friendship is.”
Princess Celestia gave a long, slow nod. “We’ll work on that.”
“Can I help you?”
She turned around and found a wizened unicorn stallion, his neck bent under the weight of a lengthy beard and a thick set of spectacles. She put on her best business smile, the one reserved for her agent and publisher. “Yes, I’m here for a parent teacher conference. Could you let me in to the school, please?”
The stallion scratched his chin. “Parent… what? The fall term doesn’t start for ten weeks, Miss…”
“Twilight Velvet, and I’m well aware of the date.” The school handbook materialized next to her, opened to the section on student-teacher conduct. “It says right here that a parent can request an emergency conference with their child’s teacher at any time, and that the teacher needs to honor that request within a week. I filed my request six days and twenty three hours ago, so here I am. There’s nothing in here about waiting for the school year to start.”
The stallion stepped closer and leaned towards the book until his glasses nearly touched it. “Huh… Has that always been there?”
Twilight Velvet just kept smiling. “I’d like to see Princess Celestia, please.”
The stallion raised his eyebrows. “The Princess… Your that Twilight’s parent or legal guardian?”
“I prefer the term mother.”
He nodded. “Right, right. I guess I can take you in… I doubt anypony’s keeping up with the mail this early on.”
His horn lit, the door’s lock clicked. “Ha, I can’t wait to hear what ol’ Task Master says when he hears I met our star student’s mother before him. Maybe he’ll finally get that coronary he keeps whining about in the teacher’s lounge.”
Twilight Velvet followed him through the open door and into a barely-lit interior. Cool, dry air rose up from the polished stone floors, scented ever so slightly with chalk dust. In the dim light she could just make out the sweeping marble staircase that dominated the main hall. Seeing it again added some genuine mirth to her smile; poor little Twilight Sparkle had nearly walked right into it on her way to her entrance exam, thanks to the book she’d been trying to read at the time. The whole school had been packed then, a wall-to-wall circus of parents chasing presumed school officials with their prospective student in tow. Today the place was empty. What would it be like on Twilight Sparkle’s first day? Would the older students be kind? What about the ones in her own class, assuming there were any? There wasn’t anything in the handbook about being the Princess’s personal protégé, an oversight that she intended to squeeze for all it was worth.
“How’s young Twilight liking her summer break?” Her guide was leading her to a set of doors to the left of the stairs.
Twilight Velvet blinked at the question. “Oh, she’s spending it just how she wants to: studying, studying, and more studying.”
“That’s a good filly! I was the same way… just couldn’t get enough books.”
“What subject do you teach, sir?”
“History. I’ve been alive for most of it, you see.” He looked back at her, his grin youthful.
She chuckled. “And here I assumed a strapping young thing like you would be over the hoofball team.”
“Ah to be young again… I’ll never forget the day I got my cutie mark… the thrill, the excitement, the cheers from my friends… But here we are, the head-princess’s office, as we like to call it.”
The door before them was unremarkable, save for its being two heads taller than its neighbors. A small plaque just above eye level read Headmistress Celestia.
“And she’ll be in here?”
He nodded. “The summer sun is up, and the nobility are out hunting for royal favor and proverbial back-scratches. Where would you go to avoid them?”
“The principal’s office in a locked up school.”
“Very good, my dear.”
The door creaked open as soon as Twilight Velvet knocked on it, and a surprised but sufficiently regal “ooh, who’s there?” escaped through the gap.
She pushed open the door and bowed, catching only a glimpse of an overly tall desk laden with paperwork as she did so. “Good morning, Princess Celestia. I’m sorry for disturbing you like this, but I’m afraid I need to meet with you for an emergency parent-teacher conference.”
Princess Celestia chuckled. “Welcome, Mrs… Velvet, isn’t it? What brings you here in the middle of summer break?”
Twilight Velvet rose, her business smile still in full force. Princess Celestia looked surprisingly mundane, seated behind a desk with paperwork before her and framed awards on the wall behind her. Everything was larger than normal, of course; the desk reached Twilight Velvet’s nose. Equating this oversized office pony with the shining beacon of Princesshood she’d seen during the summer sun celebration took some effort. “I’m here about my daughter, Twilight Sparkle.”
A smile crossed Princess Celestia’s face, and not the kind Twilight Velvet expected; she’d seen and given her share of friendly façades to push a book deal through, but this looked different. The Princess actually looked happy about being accosted by a meddling, busybody parent. “Please, have a seat. I hope Twilight isn’t too nervous, especially when she still has so much time off ahead of her.”
The chair wasn’t like anything Twilight Velvet had seen before. It looked more like a series of oversized, padded steps, each one as wide as a seat cushion. The lowest one was at a normal chair’s height, and the next two taller still. She climbed up the second step, which put her on level with Princess Celestia. The topmost step, which was just a few inches taller, would’ve been perfect for a foal to sit eye to eye with the Princess of Equestria. “This is an… interesting chair.”
“One of my former students made it for me, a little something to help students and parents see me for what I am in this office: a teacher. Now what’s so urgent that you needed to invoke the ‘emergency conference’ rule before Twilight’s even been through her first day?”
“I’ll get right to the point, your majesty. Twilight’s cute-ceañera is this Friday at one, and I’d very much like for you to make an appearance.”
The warmth drained out of Princess Celestia’s smile; now she was all business. “While I’m flattered that you’d invite me, I’m afraid I can’t come. Surely you understand how many graduations, parties, and social events parents routinely ask me to attend. I don’t have time to go to them all, and it would hardly be fair to select just a few. I can’t make an exception, not even for Twilight Sparkle.”
Twilight Velvet expected this. She’d expected this from the moment she’d suggested this crazy idea to her husband a week ago. “I can respect that, Princess, so long as you understand why I’m asking. Will you give me that, at least? I won’t waste your time.”
Princess Celestia nodded. “Go on.”
“Twilight earned her cutie mark during her entrance exam for your school, well after her public school let out for the summer. The handful of acquaintances she has are either on vacation, including Princess Cadence, or have some other excuse to not come to the ‘weird kid’s’ party, the kid that always has her nose in a book.”
Princess Celestia’s smile vanished. “I don’t understand.”
“You’ve spent five minutes with my daughter, Princess. You’ve seen that she’s very talented, but you haven’t seen how she spends every waking moment studying. I wanted her to come to your school so she’d meet some fillies and colts her age that she’d actually identify with… maybe that can still happen with her being your personal student, but it isn’t about to happen by Friday, and believe me I’ve gone down the entire first-year class roster and sent out invitations…”
Twilight Velvet leaned forward, her hooves on the desk. “My daughter doesn’t have friends, Princess Celestia. She doesn’t even expect anyone to show up to her cute-ceañera, and what’s worse is she doesn’t care! She’s perfectly happy to sit around eating cake with her parents and big brother because she doesn’t know what having actual friends is like. She deserves better than a cute-ceañera with no friends, even if she doesn’t expect it. What could show her the value of healthy social interaction more than seeing it demonstrated by the Princess she idolizes?”
Princess Celestia opened her mouth slightly, as if she was voicing the uncomfortable silence that hung in the air for seconds on end. “Of course she deserves better… and during her studies with me, I’ll ensure—”
“That sounds suspiciously like an exception to me, Princess, just like when you publicly stated you’d take a single filly under your wing for private lessons. You’re already going to be present for plenty of her life events simply because you’re her teacher, so why not this one? She’ll have plenty of birthdays and other celebrations, but only one cute-ceañera.”
A frown crossed Princess Celestia’s face, which made Twilight Velvet’s smile all the harder to maintain. “Tell me, Twilight Velvet, what do you do for a living? Are you a corporate executive, or a lawyer?”
“I write children’s books. Publishing is a lot more cut-throat than most ponies suspect.”
“And what if Friday comes and goes without me? Would your next book be the tale of the solar tyrant that steals the dreams of little fillies?”
Twilight Velvet’s smile turned into a gasp. “This isn’t blackmail or politics, your highness.”
“Would you pull Twilight Sparkle out of my school?”
“Not if she’s going to be happy here, and nothing in the whole world would make her happier than learning from you directly.”
A quick knocking rattled the door, and a guard’s deep voice came through the gap. “Princess Celestia? Your afternoon court is set to begin in five minutes.”
Twilight Velvet dove across the desk and grabbed one of the Princess’s hooves. “Please, Princess. This isn’t for me, and I swear nopony ever has to know about it.”
Princess Celestia extracted herself from her embrace and stood. “I can’t promise you anything, but…”
Twilight Velvet nodded. “Consider it. That’s all I ask.”
Twilight Velvet stared down at the party favors lined up on the kitchen counter; twenty little bags filled with hats, noise makers, balloons, and a generous amount of star-shaped confetti. Her hoof tapped out seconds in time with the clock on the wall. In another minute everyone she’d invited would officially be half an hour late. “Stupid other parents… stupid public school… stupid scheduling conflicts… that’s what the Princess is going call it: a scheduling conflict. I should’ve just put invitations on lamp posts.”
Night Light nudged the nearest party favor with his hoof. He looked at her with a cautious yet optimistic smile she knew well, the same one she gifted to each of her book’s dashing heroes. “She was the longest of long shots, dear… but we can still make the afternoon special. What if we go out instead? We could let Twilight pick a restaurant… maybe stop by her favorite book store…”
Shining Armor sighed, the short crop of his mane barely visible over the back of the couch. A book on military strategy floated over his reclining form. “Dad, we did that last week after she aced her entrance exam! She’s probably rereading her new teleportation book right now, that’s why she hasn’t noticed what time it is. Can’t I just go upstairs and get her? We can have the cake, and sing, and—”
Twilight Velvet swiped her foreleg across the kitchen counter, scattering the party favors everywhere across the floor. She stomped into the front room and focused her magic on the streamers hanging from the ceiling. One by one, the decorations came down and joined the party favors on the floor. “Not another word, either of you! Just… let me think.”
“Mom—”
“I said let me think!”
“Mom—“
She whirled around and glared at her son, an adolescent stallion already as big as she was, but not so big that he could escape cowering under her fiery gaze. “What, Shining Armor? What?”
He curled into a ball and held a spare cushion up as a shield. “There’s… um… there’s somepony outside… looks important.”
Night Light reached the front window first, and his tail stuck straight out when he did. “D-dear, you didn’t say anything… threatening to Princess Celestia, did you?”
Twilight Velvet gasped. “What? Of course not!”
“Shining Armor, did you commit some horrible crime that you’d like to tell us about?”
Shining Armor jumped off the couch and joined them at the window. “Are you crazy? I’ve got a week left before I go to the acad—whoa.”
Twilight Velvet pressed her nose to the glass. A chariot was parked on their front lawn, and no less than ten royal guards, were lining up next to it. “Go get Twilight.”
“Huh?”
“Go get your little sister! Tell her study time is over, the guests are here! Night Light, could you wait by the door while I… um… pick up the mess I made?”
Shining Armor ran for the stairs, while Night Light headed for the kitchen. “I’ll clean up, dear. If the royal guard is coming to arrest you for Princess harassment, who am I to stand in their way?”
She rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue. “You’d better hope they do, because if they don’t my pillow’s got a date with your f—”
The sound of the doorbell made her jump. The soft clang of metal on metal, the sweet music she’d been fantasizing about since sending out invitations was finally calling out to her. “J-just a minute! Be right there!”
“How about that, they’re not just breaking the door down.”
She shot Night Light one last glare and marched to the front door. Twilight ran down the staircase and nearly collided with her. “There’s ponies here to see me? Really?”
Shining Armor came up behind her, laughing. “Really, Twily.”
Twilight Velvet smiled. “Let’s just remember to be friendly and accepting, no matter what they look like, okay honey?”
Young Twilight gave a vigorous nod. “I will, mom. I promise!”
Twilight Velvet took a deep breath, her eyes fixed on the new cutie mark on her daughter’s flank. “Why don’t you open the door, honey?”
Young Twilight’s horn glowed purple, and the front door swung open. Two royal guards in full armor stood in the doorway, their stern expressions as friendly and inviting as a brick wall.
Young Twilight gave a seconds-long gasp. “Are… are you here for my party?”
Twilight Velvet bit her lip. They’d better be. If this was some sort of sick prank, no jury would ever convict her.
The guard on the left spoke, his voice as level and stern as his expression. “Is the residence of one Twilight Sparkle, personal student of Princess Celestia?”
Young Twilight gave her mother a brief glance before nodding. “Yeah… That’s me.”
“And is this the date and time of her cute-ceañera?”
Young Twilight tilted her head slightly. “Yes…”
Both of the guards pulled off their helmets and grinned. “Phew, we’re at the right place! Can we please come to your party, Miss Twilight?”
Young Twilight smiled. “Sure! That’s okay, right Mom?”
Twilight Velvet beckoned them inside. “I hope you’re all in the mood for cake.”
Twelve royal guards filed through door in two straight lights, removing their helmets as they did so. In seconds the quiet house was filled with conversation and calls for the special filly to tell them her cutie mark story.
Twilight Velvet took a deep breath, exhaling a week upon week of worry in the process. Little Twilight had some guests at her party, and she didn’t care that they were muscle-bound stallions clad armor.
“Did somepony say cake?”
The room went silent, and Twilight Sparkle gasped. “Is… Is that—“
Princess Celestia ducked through the entryway. “Good afternoon, Twilight Sparkle.”
“You came to my cute-ceañera! Oh thank you, Princess!”
Princess Celestia smiled at Twilight Velvet. “Your cute-ceañera is today? How convenient! I actually came to begin your private lessons early, but that can wait until we’ve celebrated, don’t you think?”
Young Twilight’s smile faltered for just a moment, at least until she looked at the roomful of guests. “Oh wow, I guess that can wait… Since we have guests and everything.”
“Wonderful.”
An hour later, the party was still in full swing. Twilight Velvet sat at the kitchen table, watching guard ponies tossing her daughter in the air amid repeated choruses of For She’s a Jolly Good Pony. Her attention wandered to the other side of the room, were two other guards had her son backed into a corner.
“—hear you’re shipping off to the academy.”
Shining Armor saluted. “Y-yes, Sir!”
“Think you’ve got what it takes to be a Royal Guard, eh? Maybe a lieutenant?”
“Yes, Sir!”
The guard shook his head. “Wrong! You’d better aim higher than that. If you want to last a month in the academy, you’d better be aiming for captain of the guard, got that?”
Shining Armor’s eyes went wide. “C-captain of the guard?”
“Say it!”
“I-I want to be the captain of the guard… Captain Shining Armor.”
Both guards chanted in unison. “I can’t hear you!”
“Captain Shining Armor!”
Princess Celestia slipped through the room, passing groups of guards trying on party hats and testing noise makers, and joined Twilight Velvet at the table. “I’m sorry we were late.”
Twilight Velvet laughed. “Late? I wish you’d told me you were really coming, but… thank you. Thank you so much. This means the world to Twilight.”
A glass of lemonade rose to Princess Celestia’s lips. “I just gave a command lecture on the origin and historical significance of cutie marks. I’m not sure I’ll get out of here with my voice intact.”
“That’s my filly. She’ll take every bit of knowledge you give her… but I hope you see the other side now, too, the filly that… doesn’t really get what friendship is.”
Princess Celestia gave a long, slow nod. “We’ll work on that.”
She turned around and found a wizened unicorn stallion, his neck bent under the weight of a lengthy beard and a thick set of spectacles.
Oh god, it's another take on Time Enough for Love, in which Twilight Velvet learns the magic of adultery from Starswirl.
Dammit, CoffeeMinion...
This was going along smoothly for me. I loved the way Twilight Velvet was written; you can hear the voice of her daughter in her dialogue and her wit. I loved a lot of the visuals in here, too, especially the stair-chair. The Stchair. Cool concept, awesome visual.
And then it kinda... veered off course when she and Celestia started jousting. Twilight Velvet gets way too stern, way too quickly, with Celestia, and the tone of their conversation darkens considerably, almost on a dime. And while I appreciate her being such a strong mother, and an advocate for her daughter, the fact that she just starts mouthing off to Equestria's resident divine sun-god does not feel realistic.
Looking at the word count, it's obvious that there was a lot of room for development, and if you revisit this story after the Writeoff, that's where I'd suggest you invest most of your energy. Flesh out that conversation. Try and strike a different tone. I loved the assumption Celestia made about Velvet, that she was some sort of slimy lawyer type (although... wouldn't Celly have taken the time to learn as much as she could about Twilight Sparkle's family before taking her under her very literal wing?), and I think an approach more in line with that, where the characters spar through pleasant rhetoric and subtext, would better capture the kind of feel you're going for in that scene.
Also not sure how I feel about Velvet's mini-episode in the second-to-last scene.
Overall, an utter disaster and a failure. 8/10.
>>Posh
Hey man, it's not like I sit here and keep repeating the same ways to rip off Horizon all day long. I like to mix things up a little! :derpytongue2:
Hey man, it's not like I sit here and keep repeating the same ways to rip off Horizon all day long. I like to mix things up a little! :derpytongue2:
Celestia's reticence seems out of place. She's already chosen Twilight to be her protege, so Twilight should be among her top priorities. She would need a good reason to justify not being able to attend, and if she had such a reason would she not tell Velvet that outright?
The core of this story seems to be Velvet's concern that her daughter doesn't have any friends, and her subtly trying to push her in directions such that she makes them.
If Twilight's problem is no friends showing up to her party, then how does Celestia and twelve burly guards showing up solve it?
The conflict is within Velvet, because Twilight is perfectly content to be a bookworm at this point. She doesn't know that she needs friends. Given that canon Twilight doesn't learn this for a while longer, Velvet must fail to teach her that here. So I suppose it makes sense that her plan isn't very sensible.
But I think it'd be better if she had a sensible plan that failed, rather than a strange one that works, because then Velvet understands what her daughter needs but not how to get it for her, and to me that's a more compelling story.
The core of this story seems to be Velvet's concern that her daughter doesn't have any friends, and her subtly trying to push her in directions such that she makes them.
If Twilight's problem is no friends showing up to her party, then how does Celestia and twelve burly guards showing up solve it?
The conflict is within Velvet, because Twilight is perfectly content to be a bookworm at this point. She doesn't know that she needs friends. Given that canon Twilight doesn't learn this for a while longer, Velvet must fail to teach her that here. So I suppose it makes sense that her plan isn't very sensible.
But I think it'd be better if she had a sensible plan that failed, rather than a strange one that works, because then Velvet understands what her daughter needs but not how to get it for her, and to me that's a more compelling story.
A mother truly knows best, huh?
I really enjoyed reading this, it had a nice flow, and several moments made me chuckle. But, while I think it's a fine story, there are still some things that could be improved.
First of all, Velvet's attitude towards Princess Celestia... Is something with which I have no problem. I know some have raised the concern of why is she addressing the Princess so bluntly, but I don't think this is out of character for a concerned mother to do (then again, my mom was and still is a very confrontational person, so maybe that's why I don't find it odd). She identifies something her daughter needs and will do her damned best to make sure she gets it, even if she does get a bit overboard at some moments.
That being said, she's still addressing the ruler of the nation, so while I understand her actions, perhaps you could have fleshed it out a bit more by spending some time within Twilight Velvet's mind so we've the chance to see what she's thinking, how she's feeling when asking Princess Celestia a favour. All of these could have helped the scene have more depth and feel more real.
Afterwards, I don't think the party scene was developed to its fullest. I was almost expecting Celestia to bring some other students as well, so Twilight would get to know her classmates, thus showing the first signs of the Princess setting her on a quest for friendship.
What we got felt a bit... I'unno. Off, I'd say. I still greatly enjoyed it, but makes me want more than what we got.
>>Posh
Imagine that. Starswirl travelled forward in time to impregnate Twilight Velvet, thus assuring lil' Miss Sparkle would be born.
Poor, poor Night Light...
I really enjoyed reading this, it had a nice flow, and several moments made me chuckle. But, while I think it's a fine story, there are still some things that could be improved.
First of all, Velvet's attitude towards Princess Celestia... Is something with which I have no problem. I know some have raised the concern of why is she addressing the Princess so bluntly, but I don't think this is out of character for a concerned mother to do (then again, my mom was and still is a very confrontational person, so maybe that's why I don't find it odd). She identifies something her daughter needs and will do her damned best to make sure she gets it, even if she does get a bit overboard at some moments.
That being said, she's still addressing the ruler of the nation, so while I understand her actions, perhaps you could have fleshed it out a bit more by spending some time within Twilight Velvet's mind so we've the chance to see what she's thinking, how she's feeling when asking Princess Celestia a favour. All of these could have helped the scene have more depth and feel more real.
Afterwards, I don't think the party scene was developed to its fullest. I was almost expecting Celestia to bring some other students as well, so Twilight would get to know her classmates, thus showing the first signs of the Princess setting her on a quest for friendship.
What we got felt a bit... I'unno. Off, I'd say. I still greatly enjoyed it, but makes me want more than what we got.
>>Posh
Oh god, it's another take on Time Enough for Love, in which Twilight Velvet learns the magic of adultery from Starswirl.
Imagine that. Starswirl travelled forward in time to impregnate Twilight Velvet, thus assuring lil' Miss Sparkle would be born.
Poor, poor Night Light...
>>Zaid Val'Roa
*scribbles notes for next Writeoff*
:trollestia:
">>Posh
Oh god, it's another take on Time Enough for Love, in which Twilight Velvet learns the magic of adultery from Starswirl."
Imagine that. Starswirl travelled forward in time to impregnate Twilight Velvet, thus assuring lil' Miss Sparkle would be born.
Poor, poor Night Light...
*scribbles notes for next Writeoff*
:trollestia:
Genre: D'aww
Thoughts: It's probably timeEnough for me to stop defacing the comments section of this one and write an actual review.
... unless I wrote this, and that's totally a Starswirl cameo, and the deal is that he and Future!Vinyl have retired to the Future!/Past? and they help out with the school in their spare time. :trollestia:
But in all seriousness, this was a thoroughly enjoyable read that fits into canon like a glove. I have the vague impression that some minor editing could tune it up even more, but it was compelling and well-executed and I'm running out of other unhelpful ways to describe my satisfaction with this.
It wasn't as ambitious or quite as brilliant as the fics I'm putting higher than it, but it does what it does with aplomb.
Tier: Top Competitor
Thoughts: It's probably time
... unless I wrote this, and that's totally a Starswirl cameo, and the deal is that he and Future!Vinyl have retired to the Future!/Past? and they help out with the school in their spare time. :trollestia:
But in all seriousness, this was a thoroughly enjoyable read that fits into canon like a glove. I have the vague impression that some minor editing could tune it up even more, but it was compelling and well-executed and I'm running out of other unhelpful ways to describe my satisfaction with this.
It wasn't as ambitious or quite as brilliant as the fics I'm putting higher than it, but it does what it does with aplomb.
Tier: Top Competitor
Twilight Velvet's friendship speech was poignant, painful (in a good way), and hauntingly familiar at the 'Hey here's a kid happy to be in books over friendship', and I can easily see her being that earnest. I'll echo >>Zaid Val'Roa that we could use a little more selling on how Velvet can be so straight up blunt with Celestia. In fact, one would need to sell it more because it's the opposite of how Twilight Sparkle herself is; why do parent and child deviate so?
The only other bit I think that stumbles is that it's all Royal Guards. That, I feel, could use some diversifying - like, for example, what about maids or butlers or others likely to interact with Twilight as she grows up? Or whomever are going to form Twilight's extended social circle? Some guards work great for Shining, but it seems kind of like we're reflecting Celestia's own social circle here; I feel a young Raven or a younger Kibitz (or both), as examples, would also be brilliant to bring in.
But yea. I really really liked this one.
The only other bit I think that stumbles is that it's all Royal Guards. That, I feel, could use some diversifying - like, for example, what about maids or butlers or others likely to interact with Twilight as she grows up? Or whomever are going to form Twilight's extended social circle? Some guards work great for Shining, but it seems kind of like we're reflecting Celestia's own social circle here; I feel a young Raven or a younger Kibitz (or both), as examples, would also be brilliant to bring in.
But yea. I really really liked this one.
Solid waffy stuff. Not a lot to say here. Young Twilight's voice needs a little work, I think. As others have said, the conflict between Celestia and Velvet comes on a little too strong, but still. I dunno. It was fun.
This is the other has-less-reviews-than-the-others story I want to bring up the numbers for, but I'm not sure that I actually have much to say. It's #3 out of my 18 votes, so clearly it worked for me pretty well.
Maybe it's that I'm used to reading such a variety of stories with different interpretations of characters (especially royalty) — seeing Celestia and Luna as everything from self-important gods to epic trollers — but it's rare for me to have a problem with the portrayals of how characters treat them and how they respond, as long as it makes internal sense within that story's universe. Clearly this is a universe in which Celestia's interpretation is more down-to-earth and approachable, and even regular ponies take advantage of that. (A view often shared by the show and comic canon, I should note.) It's kind of refreshing, honestly, to see a story about overbearing parents in which that parent activism is explicitly in the child's best interest, and things turn out well for everyone involved. Everyone's acting in good pony ways here and that makes for a satisfying read. The banter's good, Twilight Velvet is a clever and sympathetic protagonist, and this thoughtfully weaves in a lot of canon backstory. No real complaints, other than it seems a bit on the slight side as far as the larger arc goes, and I rated it below two longer and significantly more ambitious tales.
Tier: Top Contender
Maybe it's that I'm used to reading such a variety of stories with different interpretations of characters (especially royalty) — seeing Celestia and Luna as everything from self-important gods to epic trollers — but it's rare for me to have a problem with the portrayals of how characters treat them and how they respond, as long as it makes internal sense within that story's universe. Clearly this is a universe in which Celestia's interpretation is more down-to-earth and approachable, and even regular ponies take advantage of that. (A view often shared by the show and comic canon, I should note.) It's kind of refreshing, honestly, to see a story about overbearing parents in which that parent activism is explicitly in the child's best interest, and things turn out well for everyone involved. Everyone's acting in good pony ways here and that makes for a satisfying read. The banter's good, Twilight Velvet is a clever and sympathetic protagonist, and this thoughtfully weaves in a lot of canon backstory. No real complaints, other than it seems a bit on the slight side as far as the larger arc goes, and I rated it below two longer and significantly more ambitious tales.
Tier: Top Contender
I love Twilight Velvet in this. I wish we'd seen some more Twilight Sparkle, though. She and her problems are largely unseen by the reader, even if we all can buy into her having issues with friendship.
Twilight Velvet's little conference ended a little too quickly for me. It doesn't need to be twice the length or something, but a few more lines between the courteous bow and throwing herself across the desk would be apropos. Surely she's given this whole interview thorough consideration, and has more things to ask about what daughter's unique school experience will be like.
Seeing more of the party would be nice, too, particularly Celestia's interactions with Twilight. Why did she bring only guards and not some of the school or palace staff that Twilight will interact with regularly?
Twilight Velvet's little conference ended a little too quickly for me. It doesn't need to be twice the length or something, but a few more lines between the courteous bow and throwing herself across the desk would be apropos. Surely she's given this whole interview thorough consideration, and has more things to ask about what daughter's unique school experience will be like.
Seeing more of the party would be nice, too, particularly Celestia's interactions with Twilight. Why did she bring only guards and not some of the school or palace staff that Twilight will interact with regularly?
I quite like:
The idea of Twilight Velvet as "tiger mother," but we see by the end of her scene with Celestia that she really isn't. So I'd suggest heightening the contrast: make us think even stronger that she's a hard-nosed, driven parental unit at the opening, and make her meltdown in Celestia's office even deeper and more desperate.
I'd even go so far as to suggest changing the POV. Give us that first scene through the history professor's eyes and have what he sees of her there peg her in his mind and ours as more a drill sergeant than a mother. Have Celestia be our POV character for the second scene as Velvet slowly comes unglued so we finally see her as she really is, then switch us to Velvet for the last scene so we be right there in her head to feel how out-of-control she thinks her life has become, being the mother of a child prodigy. I'd also suggest that Celestia bring young Lyra, Lemon Hearts, Minuette, and Moondancer with her to the party as well as the guards.
Yeesh! I'm just fulla suggestions this morning! :O
Mike
The idea of Twilight Velvet as "tiger mother," but we see by the end of her scene with Celestia that she really isn't. So I'd suggest heightening the contrast: make us think even stronger that she's a hard-nosed, driven parental unit at the opening, and make her meltdown in Celestia's office even deeper and more desperate.
I'd even go so far as to suggest changing the POV. Give us that first scene through the history professor's eyes and have what he sees of her there peg her in his mind and ours as more a drill sergeant than a mother. Have Celestia be our POV character for the second scene as Velvet slowly comes unglued so we finally see her as she really is, then switch us to Velvet for the last scene so we be right there in her head to feel how out-of-control she thinks her life has become, being the mother of a child prodigy. I'd also suggest that Celestia bring young Lyra, Lemon Hearts, Minuette, and Moondancer with her to the party as well as the guards.
Yeesh! I'm just fulla suggestions this morning! :O
Mike
Friendship 101 Retrospective
Thanks for your comments, everyone! Most Controversial, huh? I'm surprised this flat out didn't work for so many of you; it sounded like such an innocuous concept to me. Then again, I scored Top Contender picks from Horizon and CoffeeMinion, and that’s a definite honor.
With only a couple hours of writing time to put towards this thing, I wanted to do something short and self-contained, something I knew I could properly flesh out in such limited time. I still didn't get a chance to edit it, alas.
Anyway, I’m going to expand the conversation and the party, and add at least one other scene. I’m not planning on Twilight Velvet being a meat-eating, jugular-hungry tiger mom though, she just has some practiced negotiating skills that she’ll gladly bring home from the office… but she might have met her match.
I’m not sure when I’ll have this finished and posted, but hopefully before February hits… Pony is strictly a weekend project until I can finish some some original fiction stuff.
Thanks for your comments, everyone! Most Controversial, huh? I'm surprised this flat out didn't work for so many of you; it sounded like such an innocuous concept to me. Then again, I scored Top Contender picks from Horizon and CoffeeMinion, and that’s a definite honor.
With only a couple hours of writing time to put towards this thing, I wanted to do something short and self-contained, something I knew I could properly flesh out in such limited time. I still didn't get a chance to edit it, alas.
Anyway, I’m going to expand the conversation and the party, and add at least one other scene. I’m not planning on Twilight Velvet being a meat-eating, jugular-hungry tiger mom though, she just has some practiced negotiating skills that she’ll gladly bring home from the office… but she might have met her match.
I’m not sure when I’ll have this finished and posted, but hopefully before February hits… Pony is strictly a weekend project until I can finish some some original fiction stuff.