>>GroaningGreyAgony

Alas:

I got my days mixed up...

Mike

Thanks, >>Trick_Question:

And congrats on the gold! As you said, we're all top three here. :)

With this prompt, my first thought was "Who in FiM would ever say such a thing, and to whom would they say it?" "Starswirl" and "The Tree of Harmony" were the immediate answer, and I've been meaning to write a fic about my theory that the Sombra we saw in the Season 9 opening wasn't the actual Sombra. I'd written a story from Tree's POV a couple years ago, so with a semi-sequel in mind, I set off.

It definitely needs some smoothing out, and I'll be doing that before posting it to FimFiction. I always have trouble getting the right balance of mystery and revelation since, like I said in my earlier comment, I don't much enjoy figuring things out in stories but I know that most readers do. So, yeah: second draft, here I come!

Mike

This isn't a subject:

With which I have any personal familiarity, so I can't speak to that. But from the point of view of straight-up story structure, the scenes seems slightly out of order to me.

The first scene with Scootaloo not being able to fly off the clubhouse railing would lead her to what's currently the third scene: the suicide attempt. A part of Scootaloo could even be insisting that it's just another attempt to fly: she failed in the first scene, she could tell herself, because she didn't have enough room to operate, but she would also be having those thoughts about how much she'll miss Ponyville. Celestia would still catch her, but she would then take her to the hospital, and we'd have the scene with Redheart. That's what I'd call the heart of the story, and Scottaloo's aceptance of what Redheart says would be her first step away from the cliff's edge as it were.

I'm not sure about the ending with Scootaloo planning to leave Ponyville after all her thoughts earlier about how much she'd miss the place and the ponies: it almost read like more avoidance on her part. But maybe part of her acceptance is the idea that she just plain can't heal in this place that's seen her at her worst. She needs to leave to become the pony she thinks she can be....

Oh, and "millennia" is plural, so saying "a millennia" won't work. It oughtta be "a millennium. :)

Mike

Unlike the sorts of readers:

TQ talks about in this comment here, I don't much enjoy having to figure things out when it comes to stories. So the questions and the gaps here left me slightly disgruntled.

I'll especially echo >>Trick_Question's question about why Starswirl is doing this. I thought maybe he was in love with Rarity, but his comments at the end reassuring Rarity that she and Spike will be marrying in a year's time throw that idea out the window. The story almost seems to suggest that it's just a whim on Starswirl's part when Twilight compares him to Pinkie Pie, but that forces the author to turn Starswirl into a different character than we saw in the show. I mean, we've already got Discord as a whimsical and overpowered character: maybe he should be behind it all?

Or maybe it should be Rarity herself. We see at the beginning that she's got enough magical power to open a portal through which vast amounts of money flows. Maybe she's gained all kind of new powers since the show ended. And where did she get all the money? How did she become a duchess? Just a few words addressing these issues sprinked here and there - when Spike brings up his and Twilight's wealth compared to Rarity's, we could get a cogent detail or two on these points introduced, seems to me...

But like I said, I'm a lazy reader. I prefer the author to do the work, not me. :)

Mike

I don't remember:

How I voted on this prompt, but it's turning out to be a good one. Hopefully I can get the story finished in time to submit it... :)

Mike

>>QuillScratch

And I've finally:

Gotten the expanded version up on FimFiction. :)

Mike

>>Pascoite
>>GroaningGreyAgony

This picture:

Technically doesn't qualify for inclusion here. I drew it at the beginning of the month as the illustration for page 20 of the current story I'm telling over on what used to be my daily webcomic site--I'm now posting a series of illustrated novellas over there with a new page every Monday. Wednesday, and Friday. When I saw the weird prompt, I recalled drawing my spider fairy characters walking through an archway of magical webbing, so I figured I'd throw it in with whatever lovely photos GGA came up with. :)

Mike

I'm hoping:

To have something--which it to say I've got half of something and aim to get the rest of it done before sundown.

Mike

>>Monokeras

I'm also:

Breaking rules on this one. It's a sequel to a piece I wrote as a minific years ago--though I think it stands pretty well on its own--and I plan on publishing it on Fimfic as an entry in the May Pairing Contest on what I believe will be the day before this contest is over. Oh, what rebels we've become! :)

Mike

>>Pascoite

Thanks, Pasco:

It feels like I've been thinking about this story for years, and tapping it out over those couple days at the beginning of the month, I think I missed some of the things I wanted to put in. Another run through the word processor, though, and there might be something here...

Mike

>>Pascoite

Thanks, Pasco:

My new schedule at work is making it a challenge to visit the internet as often as I once did, but I always appreciate your comments. I've never heard "banal" pronounced with the accent on the first syllable, but now that I check my dictionary, I see that it's listed as a possibility. Something else to remember when it comes to this rhyming metrical stuff.

As for the poem, yeah, the birds are supposed to come across as pretty tone deaf, as it were. They know what they like, and anything else isn't worth considering... :)

Mike

>>Pascoite

Thanks, Pasco:

The form doesn't have a name as far as I know. The rhyme scheme is what they call chain rhyme where lines in one stanza rhyme with lines in the next, and the rhythm is a variation on what they call common meter using three-beat anapests instead of the usual two-beat iambs.

My intention was to make the first two stanzas a dialogue between the fish, the introverts, and the frogs, the extroverts, where they express how much they envy the other, then have a narrator come in in the last two stanzas and says how they'll never admit that they envy each other. A little more tinktering, and I think that'll come through better. :)

Mike

>>Pascoite

Thanks, Pasco:

I'd say there's a solid first draft here, and I'll definitely be working on it for submission to the various markets.

Mike

>>Pascoite
>>Heavy_Mole

Thanks, folks!

I've only been in places where there's snow, I think, three times in my life, and the three adjectives that've stuck with me from those experiences are "cold" and "wet" and "yucky." But yeah, I can't help getting humorous about stuff... :)

Mike

>>QuillScratch:

Thanks for the comment!

When I checked last week and saw that no one had submitted a prompt, I found myself getting all nostalgic for the good ol' days 'round here. So I thought I'd do some sorta take on nostalgia and went looking online for well-known poems that deal with nostalgia so I could get a title. Nothing struck me in any way, and then I remembered that first line of "Howl," the way Ginsberg positions himself as a survivor looking back.

And then I just let myself get goofy with it. :)

But yes, I'm glad GGA got one in here, too. The more, the merrier!

Mike

>>QuillScratch
>>Pascoite

Thanks, folks!

My immediate thought when I saw the prompt was that "possession" needed to mean a spirit getting into a place where people didn't want it to be. The stone around the leg, then, would be a method of settling that spirit down. Not that the final poem quite ended up that way... I came up with the final line pretty early in the process and was shocked to discover how few things rhyme with "subscribe."

A little tweaking of the couplet, though, and this one'll be ready to start making the rounds of the SF poetry mags. :)

Mike

>>cometheartphos

Thanks!

And welcome to the site. Hope to see entries from you soon, too. :)

Mike

>>Pascoite
>>QuillScratch

Thanks, folks!

For the past month, I've been putting together the outline for a possible poetry collection to be called "The Frog Wizard's Notebook." So I've got these characters and situations bouncing around in my head, and seeing the minific contest coming up, I submitted this prompt in the hope that it would get picked, and then wrote this little squib to clarify my thoughts on how magic is going to work in this talking-animal universe I'm building.

One of the narrative conceits I'm playing with is that Our Hero--I haven't come up with a name for him yet and might just have everyone call him the Frog Wizard throughout; I dunno--always has this inner monologue going on with an eye toward the autobiography he knows he'll eventually be writing. What we're seeing is the notebook he's constructing in his head while the actual events play out around him. But again, I'm not sure if I wanna really do that... :)

Mike

Ha!

Got it in!

Mike!

I was really, really hoping:

I could have this story I've been working on all weekend finished, but it's not looking good...

Mike

>>Pascoite

Thanks, Pasco:

The distinction I'm trying to make here is "the magic of inspiration" versus "the magic of perspiration," so I need to make that clearer. Actually, Professor Nacreous could just use those very words in the first scene, couldn't she? I'll look at the last scene, too, now that I haven't got a deadline tapping its foot at me. :)

Mike

>>Pascoite

Thanks!

Yeah, I'll definitely need to whole phoenix idea in there better when sending it out. Oh, and if you're looking for a form where the half-line is supposed to rhyme with the B lines, check out the Roundel. It's got fewer lines, too, which makes it work a lot better in English. :)

Mike

I had to:

Run the prompt through Google before I voted, but yeah, I could do something with this. Unfortunately, I've got three other pieces of writing I need to work on this weekend, so, as with "Plasma," I may not get a chance to work on the idea I've got here for another month and a half.

There's always so much going on!

Mike

Turned out:

I didn't have time this weekend. So it's looking less than likely that I'll have something finished by the deadline.

Mike

OK!

This prompt fits an idea I've been wanting to write out for a while now. I might even have time this weekend, too... :)

Mike