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>>Heavy_Mole
>>Pascoite
Thanks, folks!
The idea here is that squirrels--yeah, I prefer it as one syllable, but the dictionaries disagree--have been purposefully attacking power lines all this time--the phenomenon even has its own Wikipedia page! But we humans keep thinking it's accidental. Because that's how we humans think.
Mike
>>Pascoite
Thanks, folks!
The idea here is that squirrels--yeah, I prefer it as one syllable, but the dictionaries disagree--have been purposefully attacking power lines all this time--the phenomenon even has its own Wikipedia page! But we humans keep thinking it's accidental. Because that's how we humans think.
Mike
>>Pascoite
>>Heavy_Mole
>>Corinna
Thanks, folks!
As always, I have one word that throws the rhythm off because of ambiguous pronunciation. So "peculiar" will become "eccentric" before I start sending this one out to the poetry magazines. As for the French loanwords, once I had one in each of the first two stanzas, I realized that I needed one in all four, but yeah, they're supposed to rhyme with the other "ay" words.
As for whether the narrator's crazy or not, I'll leave that up to the reader. From the first word of the poem, he seems to think he's on the road to becoming an Edger Allan Poe character, but these artistic types, I've found, never seem to understand their own work... :)
Oh, and if anyone wants to hear me reading a little Hallowe'en rondeau I wrote maybe ten years ago, it's included in the 2024 SFPA Halloween Poetry Reading. The poem's called "Halloween Weather"--though I continue to insist that "Hallowe'en" needs that ' between the 'e's--and it's a little more than halfway down the page.
Mike
>>Heavy_Mole
>>Corinna
Thanks, folks!
As always, I have one word that throws the rhythm off because of ambiguous pronunciation. So "peculiar" will become "eccentric" before I start sending this one out to the poetry magazines. As for the French loanwords, once I had one in each of the first two stanzas, I realized that I needed one in all four, but yeah, they're supposed to rhyme with the other "ay" words.
As for whether the narrator's crazy or not, I'll leave that up to the reader. From the first word of the poem, he seems to think he's on the road to becoming an Edger Allan Poe character, but these artistic types, I've found, never seem to understand their own work... :)
Oh, and if anyone wants to hear me reading a little Hallowe'en rondeau I wrote maybe ten years ago, it's included in the 2024 SFPA Halloween Poetry Reading. The poem's called "Halloween Weather"--though I continue to insist that "Hallowe'en" needs that ' between the 'e's--and it's a little more than halfway down the page.
Mike
No entries at all:
Appropriate, I suppose, if things're like a ghost town around here... :)
Mike
Appropriate, I suppose, if things're like a ghost town around here... :)
Mike
I'm focusing on:
This thing for the FimFiction Pony Poetry contest, so I won't have anything this round here, alas.
Mike
This thing for the FimFiction Pony Poetry contest, so I won't have anything this round here, alas.
Mike
>>Heavy_Mole
>>Pascoite
Thanks, folks:
I forgot all about this till just now. It needs another run through the word processor as they say--the first person narrator shjowing up at the end took me completely by surprise as I was writing, for instance--but I think there's something here worth poking at.
Mike
>>Pascoite
Thanks, folks:
I forgot all about this till just now. It needs another run through the word processor as they say--the first person narrator shjowing up at the end took me completely by surprise as I was writing, for instance--but I think there's something here worth poking at.
Mike
I tried:
Twice to submit a prompt, but I kept getting this weird error message. I posted about it in the "meta" section of the Discord channel, but I haven't been over there to see if Roger noticed. Ah, technology...
Mike
Twice to submit a prompt, but I kept getting this weird error message. I posted about it in the "meta" section of the Discord channel, but I haven't been over there to see if Roger noticed. Ah, technology...
Mike
If folks want to see:
The final version of this--thanks again, >>Pascoite--it's up on the Silver Blade website with a few alterations and a slight title change, "One Last Pie in the Face."
Mike
The final version of this--thanks again, >>Pascoite--it's up on the Silver Blade website with a few alterations and a slight title change, "One Last Pie in the Face."
Mike
>>Pascoite
>>Heavy_Mole
Thanks, folks:
And congrats to the other medalists! The prompt made me think of the whole "seven ages of man" thing from philosophers and Shakespeare and all those kinda guys. I also knew I'd need a seven line stanza, and my favorite is the one called Canopus after a long poem Clement Wood wrote back in the 1930s. Canopus also being a star, I had to go all cosmic, and here it is.
I think it needs one more verse, actually, each line using one of seven rhymes already established in the poem to bring it back into the present and say something about how the universes know the end is coming someday, but that day isn't today so they don't worry about it. Or something... :)
Mike
>>Heavy_Mole
Thanks, folks:
And congrats to the other medalists! The prompt made me think of the whole "seven ages of man" thing from philosophers and Shakespeare and all those kinda guys. I also knew I'd need a seven line stanza, and my favorite is the one called Canopus after a long poem Clement Wood wrote back in the 1930s. Canopus also being a star, I had to go all cosmic, and here it is.
I think it needs one more verse, actually, each line using one of seven rhymes already established in the poem to bring it back into the present and say something about how the universes know the end is coming someday, but that day isn't today so they don't worry about it. Or something... :)
Mike
I really wanna thank:
Whoever's prompt this was. I had the best time putting a thing together for this. :)
Mike
Whoever's prompt this was. I had the best time putting a thing together for this. :)
Mike
>>Pascoite
Thanks, Pasco:
My thought was to start it rhymed and metered and restricted, and then have it explode like ink spattered across a page into a mix of alliteration, rhymes, blank verse, free verse, and whatever. I could definitely do more to get that spattering imagery into it...
Mike
Thanks, Pasco:
My thought was to start it rhymed and metered and restricted, and then have it explode like ink spattered across a page into a mix of alliteration, rhymes, blank verse, free verse, and whatever. I could definitely do more to get that spattering imagery into it...
Mike
I was really:
Unsure about this prompt, but then something occurred to me, and I've actually got a rough draft finished with a couple days left to go. I can't even remember the last time that happened!
Mike
Unsure about this prompt, but then something occurred to me, and I've actually got a rough draft finished with a couple days left to go. I can't even remember the last time that happened!
Mike
If I'd had time:
To enter this weekend, I would've done something with this picture--something about giant ghost trees, I think, or possibly the giant ghost squirrels who live in them. I may yet write it, as a matter of fact... :)
Mike
To enter this weekend, I would've done something with this picture--something about giant ghost trees, I think, or possibly the giant ghost squirrels who live in them. I may yet write it, as a matter of fact... :)
Mike
Congrats to our medalists:
And thanks, >>Rubidium, >>Heavy_Mole, and >>Chris again for the comments. Like I said earlier, I wasn't planning on entering 'cause minifics and I have never gotten along. But the prompt drew me in, and I didn't have time to do anything more than what's here before the deadline hit. I think there might be a story here somewhere, but I'm gonna hafta think about it some more. Oh, and "Rovera" is just "Rover" with an "a" at the end to make it a girls' name... :)
Mike
And thanks, >>Rubidium, >>Heavy_Mole, and >>Chris again for the comments. Like I said earlier, I wasn't planning on entering 'cause minifics and I have never gotten along. But the prompt drew me in, and I didn't have time to do anything more than what's here before the deadline hit. I think there might be a story here somewhere, but I'm gonna hafta think about it some more. Oh, and "Rovera" is just "Rover" with an "a" at the end to make it a girls' name... :)
Mike
What >>Chris said:
I can't say that I have any idea what's going on here, either. I'd suggest jettisoning all the Roofus stuff and have the story be about Cranky moved to tears when he meets Whoa Nelly and learns that he can still hate others even with all the happiness he's fallen into. But it definitely needs some more work.
Mike
I can't say that I have any idea what's going on here, either. I'd suggest jettisoning all the Roofus stuff and have the story be about Cranky moved to tears when he meets Whoa Nelly and learns that he can still hate others even with all the happiness he's fallen into. But it definitely needs some more work.
Mike
What >>Chris said:
The whole first paragraph here is kind of wasted real estate when writing a minific. I mean, all those words to say that the moon was full? But I completely agree about rewriting this to stay in Fluttershy's POV throughout. And our second piss joke this Writeoff: I'm surprised there aren't any fibrous nuggets anywhere... :)
Mike
The whole first paragraph here is kind of wasted real estate when writing a minific. I mean, all those words to say that the moon was full? But I completely agree about rewriting this to stay in Fluttershy's POV throughout. And our second piss joke this Writeoff: I'm surprised there aren't any fibrous nuggets anywhere... :)
Mike
What >>Chris said:
For me, it needs a little more context to make it into a story, an expansion throughout so we can understand how the dogs' actions have effected the world around them. Oh, and an extra tap of the "Enter" key between paragraphs, please. It makes thing much easier to read.
Mike
For me, it needs a little more context to make it into a story, an expansion throughout so we can understand how the dogs' actions have effected the world around them. Oh, and an extra tap of the "Enter" key between paragraphs, please. It makes thing much easier to read.
Mike
What >>Chris said:
That last paragraph really doesn't work with the tone of what's come before, and, well, there's no real story here, is there? All the ponies are dogs, and they've had their own doggy adventures there in Dogestria—Caninia, I suppose? But other than that? It's fun, but with more than 200 words till you reached the limit, author, I would've liked a little story...
Mike
That last paragraph really doesn't work with the tone of what's come before, and, well, there's no real story here, is there? All the ponies are dogs, and they've had their own doggy adventures there in Dogestria—Caninia, I suppose? But other than that? It's fun, but with more than 200 words till you reached the limit, author, I would've liked a little story...
Mike
What >>Chris said:
This story put the idea in my head that Clover the Clever becomes Celestia, and I like that idea a lot. It clears up some points of Equestrian history that have bothered me so much, I've written a couple stories myself trying to make them make sense.
As I said in commenting on the previous piece, complete stories always get a high score from me in minific Writeoffs, and you've definitely got one here, author. When expanding it to meet the Fimfic minimum, in addition to Chris's points, I'll add that some "scene setting" would be nice: describing where our narrator is when she's examing the Crystal Heart at the beginning, adding a few visuals as they're leaving the Empire, stuff like that. But yeah, this one's pretty much there.
Mike
This story put the idea in my head that Clover the Clever becomes Celestia, and I like that idea a lot. It clears up some points of Equestrian history that have bothered me so much, I've written a couple stories myself trying to make them make sense.
As I said in commenting on the previous piece, complete stories always get a high score from me in minific Writeoffs, and you've definitely got one here, author. When expanding it to meet the Fimfic minimum, in addition to Chris's points, I'll add that some "scene setting" would be nice: describing where our narrator is when she's examing the Crystal Heart at the beginning, adding a few visuals as they're leaving the Empire, stuff like that. But yeah, this one's pretty much there.
Mike
All my comments:
For this whole round, I feel almost certain, will start with the words, "What >>Chris said." Just like old times! :)
'Cause the past tense/present tense thing is what hit me right at the beginning, made me stop and blink and start over again. Keeping it plain ol' past tense won't trip me up that way. I'll also say that, if Winona's been barking continually for "a couple hours," that seems like a long time without AJ going to see what's up. Oh, and there's an extra "pony" as the third word in the penultimate paragraph. Still, I'm always impressed when folks can conjure up a complete story in wunna these minific rounds, so definite tunmbs-up for that!
Mike
For this whole round, I feel almost certain, will start with the words, "What >>Chris said." Just like old times! :)
'Cause the past tense/present tense thing is what hit me right at the beginning, made me stop and blink and start over again. Keeping it plain ol' past tense won't trip me up that way. I'll also say that, if Winona's been barking continually for "a couple hours," that seems like a long time without AJ going to see what's up. Oh, and there's an extra "pony" as the third word in the penultimate paragraph. Still, I'm always impressed when folks can conjure up a complete story in wunna these minific rounds, so definite tunmbs-up for that!
Mike
I hadn't really planned:
On doing anything, but I saw Chris's post and finished up my latest AugieDog story earlier on Saturday than I thought I would, so I popped over to see what the prompt was. A story then popped right into my head, and, well, there was nothing else for it but to type it out.
Mike
On doing anything, but I saw Chris's post and finished up my latest AugieDog story earlier on Saturday than I thought I would, so I popped over to see what the prompt was. A story then popped right into my head, and, well, there was nothing else for it but to type it out.
Mike
>>Pascoite
Thanks, Pasco:
How I always manage to miss one metrical glitch in these Writeoff poems, I'll never know, but this one's easily fixed at least. :)
Mike
Thanks, Pasco:
How I always manage to miss one metrical glitch in these Writeoff poems, I'll never know, but this one's easily fixed at least. :)
Mike
Alas:
I didn't get the story I was working on finished in time to submit it here, but thank you, Writeoff, for pushing me to try. I'd been trying to put a story together for the science fiction contest over on Fimfiction, but I'd only managed a couple hundred words. Trying to meet the deadline here pushed the story to just over 2,000 words and let me figure out what the whole thing was actually gonna be about.
So thanks again!
Mike
I didn't get the story I was working on finished in time to submit it here, but thank you, Writeoff, for pushing me to try. I'd been trying to put a story together for the science fiction contest over on Fimfiction, but I'd only managed a couple hundred words. Trying to meet the deadline here pushed the story to just over 2,000 words and let me figure out what the whole thing was actually gonna be about.
So thanks again!
Mike
I couldn't figure out:
How to make this prompt work with the rule that states, "Participants may not start creating their work(s) until the prompt has been selected". The pictures are very nice, though: I may come back here for inspiration when I'm looking to put a story together to submit to the magazines... :)
Mike
How to make this prompt work with the rule that states, "Participants may not start creating their work(s) until the prompt has been selected". The pictures are very nice, though: I may come back here for inspiration when I'm looking to put a story together to submit to the magazines... :)
Mike
Paging WIP