Hey! It looks like you're new here. You might want to check out the introduction.
Show rules for this event
Plug'n'Suicide
Inside the dreary, black room, a figure gazed out the window with eternal dread. He looked to the desk, his trusty revolver laid at his side, one shot left. A tear came down his cheek.
“Goodbye cruel world,” the figure said. He reached for the gun and put it to his head.
“Has this ever happened to you?” A man in a suit walked in the picture in front of the green screen.
“Ever been so low in the dumps where you just can’t hold on anymore?
“Well try the brand new Plug’n’Suicide! It’ll put your worries to ease as you plug it into a wall socket and electrocute yourself into a state of neverending sleep!
“Patented with an extra-comfort grip, buy now and--”
Joe lowered the volume to the television. “Mark!”
A muffled noise came from the distance in reply.
“Mark, you’ve got to see this!”
“Yeah?” Mark rounded the corner.
“Have you seen this bloody commercial that’s airing on the television?”
“No, what about it?”
“They’re marketing suicide now!” Joe screamed.
Mark shook his head. “Bloody hell.”
“I know right? We knew that this wank of a country was going to hell, but we’ve sunk this far now?”
Mark sighed. “These people only care about what makes money,”
“I know, right? Give it ten years and even our government is going to be marketing it!”
“Well," Mark groaned. "You’ve gotta think about it. If they’re marketing suicide and continuing to do it, it must be selling product, yeah? Every man and woman who sees that commercial and buys their stuff must have something wrong with ‘em.”
“Like you think that they’ll eat anything up just because they can identify with it?”
“Well,” Mark paused. “Yeah, gots to be.”
“Oh hey, guy! Oh hey other guy!” Joe stood up with a stuck up chest and spoke to himself in a very deep sarcastic manner. “Have you seen that commercial on the tele about the guy killing himself? Oh yeah, I was just in the middle of drinking some bleach! I’m going to buy their product now!”
Mark chuckled. “Knowing this country, that conversation probably even happened too.”
“Hey, Mark, you know why the chicken crossed the road?”
“Why?”
“Because he was depressed and wanted to get ran over by a car!”
Mark bent over with a mouth over his grin.
“You know what two words always cheer me up when I’m feeling suicidal in a public area?
“Allahu Ahkbar.”
Mark laughed out loud.
“Ah, but seriously," Joe sat back down. "Just the other day on social media, a girl complained that she was feeling sad and got like a hundred comments cheering her up. Just a few minutes later some guy was saying he was going to commit suicide. You know how many comments he got?”
Mark sniffed. “What, how many?”
“He didn’t get any. He got three likes!”
Mark laughed, he slapped his knee and began. “Mate, you’re great and all, but I gotta get ready for work.”
“Alright, don’t be late.”
Mark came back, fully dressed. “You know, you got me thinking.”
“Huh?”
“Don’t you think it a bit odd that we hate these bloody marketers advertising and merchandising suicide, while we ourselves roll on the floor laughing when we hear a joke about it?”
“Well,” Joe scratched his chin. “The difference here is that it’s funny. Just a joke, you know? We ain’t bein' serious.”
“Yeah, but still, what about them? What if that’s just a joke product?”
“A joke product? Mate, Mark, you serious?”
“Come on, joke products come out all the time. You keep buying blatantly bootleg trading cards just to joke with your friends.”
“Yeah, but trading cards can’t kill.”
“They’re intended to be used as a joke for your friends, I know, you bring them to parties all the time. But it could be the same with their product on the tele.”
“What, you mean that they would have intended that people were going to joke about suicide?”
“Yeah, exactly that.”
“So, how exactly do you know if they’re marketing it as a joke product?”
“Well, we don’t, and we can’t. I guess we can only see the response it has to the people. It’s the people who eat this stuff up, remember? They’re the ones interested in a product like this. Anyways, I’ll be off now. Gotta get to work."
“Hey, Mark.”
“Yeah?”
“You still think it’s fucked up though, yeah?”
“Well, given the current circumstance our country is in, yeah.”
“Goodbye cruel world,” the figure said. He reached for the gun and put it to his head.
“Has this ever happened to you?” A man in a suit walked in the picture in front of the green screen.
“Ever been so low in the dumps where you just can’t hold on anymore?
“Well try the brand new Plug’n’Suicide! It’ll put your worries to ease as you plug it into a wall socket and electrocute yourself into a state of neverending sleep!
“Patented with an extra-comfort grip, buy now and--”
Joe lowered the volume to the television. “Mark!”
A muffled noise came from the distance in reply.
“Mark, you’ve got to see this!”
“Yeah?” Mark rounded the corner.
“Have you seen this bloody commercial that’s airing on the television?”
“No, what about it?”
“They’re marketing suicide now!” Joe screamed.
Mark shook his head. “Bloody hell.”
“I know right? We knew that this wank of a country was going to hell, but we’ve sunk this far now?”
Mark sighed. “These people only care about what makes money,”
“I know, right? Give it ten years and even our government is going to be marketing it!”
“Well," Mark groaned. "You’ve gotta think about it. If they’re marketing suicide and continuing to do it, it must be selling product, yeah? Every man and woman who sees that commercial and buys their stuff must have something wrong with ‘em.”
“Like you think that they’ll eat anything up just because they can identify with it?”
“Well,” Mark paused. “Yeah, gots to be.”
“Oh hey, guy! Oh hey other guy!” Joe stood up with a stuck up chest and spoke to himself in a very deep sarcastic manner. “Have you seen that commercial on the tele about the guy killing himself? Oh yeah, I was just in the middle of drinking some bleach! I’m going to buy their product now!”
Mark chuckled. “Knowing this country, that conversation probably even happened too.”
“Hey, Mark, you know why the chicken crossed the road?”
“Why?”
“Because he was depressed and wanted to get ran over by a car!”
Mark bent over with a mouth over his grin.
“You know what two words always cheer me up when I’m feeling suicidal in a public area?
“Allahu Ahkbar.”
Mark laughed out loud.
“Ah, but seriously," Joe sat back down. "Just the other day on social media, a girl complained that she was feeling sad and got like a hundred comments cheering her up. Just a few minutes later some guy was saying he was going to commit suicide. You know how many comments he got?”
Mark sniffed. “What, how many?”
“He didn’t get any. He got three likes!”
Mark laughed, he slapped his knee and began. “Mate, you’re great and all, but I gotta get ready for work.”
“Alright, don’t be late.”
Mark came back, fully dressed. “You know, you got me thinking.”
“Huh?”
“Don’t you think it a bit odd that we hate these bloody marketers advertising and merchandising suicide, while we ourselves roll on the floor laughing when we hear a joke about it?”
“Well,” Joe scratched his chin. “The difference here is that it’s funny. Just a joke, you know? We ain’t bein' serious.”
“Yeah, but still, what about them? What if that’s just a joke product?”
“A joke product? Mate, Mark, you serious?”
“Come on, joke products come out all the time. You keep buying blatantly bootleg trading cards just to joke with your friends.”
“Yeah, but trading cards can’t kill.”
“They’re intended to be used as a joke for your friends, I know, you bring them to parties all the time. But it could be the same with their product on the tele.”
“What, you mean that they would have intended that people were going to joke about suicide?”
“Yeah, exactly that.”
“So, how exactly do you know if they’re marketing it as a joke product?”
“Well, we don’t, and we can’t. I guess we can only see the response it has to the people. It’s the people who eat this stuff up, remember? They’re the ones interested in a product like this. Anyways, I’ll be off now. Gotta get to work."
“Hey, Mark.”
“Yeah?”
“You still think it’s fucked up though, yeah?”
“Well, given the current circumstance our country is in, yeah.”
Well this was... British. The humor reminds me a bit of a Monty Python sketch. Some decent jokes and banter, but no big guffaws from me. Good premise and concept, and I've written something similar to this in the past, so I appreciate what you're going for.
On the other hand, you pay lip service to having a grander commentary in the subtext, and I don't think you really commit to anything grander than "the way we talk about suicide is pretty fucked up", which while I agree, isn't exactly a mind-blowing revelation. I'm not quite certain what your angle is here. Ah well. Fun enough while it lasted, I suppose.
Good ending lines.
On the other hand, you pay lip service to having a grander commentary in the subtext, and I don't think you really commit to anything grander than "the way we talk about suicide is pretty fucked up", which while I agree, isn't exactly a mind-blowing revelation. I'm not quite certain what your angle is here. Ah well. Fun enough while it lasted, I suppose.
Good ending lines.
That could be a good comment on both society and humour, but since it's minific, there isn't enough room to develop them. What we have are only tidbits without the main course. These tidbits were delicious though, I laughed a few times but without much else, I don't leave with a strong impression.
I’m stuck here wondering what was the author’s intent. The premise is fun – though I faintly having already read something similar before – but is underemployed. I wished you had gone all the way for the cynical – suggesting for example that such ads might be followed (or even inserted at the request of) by undertakers’ or insurance companies’ ads.
Instead of that, the plot wallows into bar type philosophy, which I didn’t find as much amusing as it was, well, shallow. While that might adequately convey the reasoning of the characters you depict, it doesn’t really inform the writer about what your personal message is. And I refuse to admit you set up the whole scene just for the sake of writing. There must be some sort of subtext or message, but I’m totally unable to grasp it.
Instead of that, the plot wallows into bar type philosophy, which I didn’t find as much amusing as it was, well, shallow. While that might adequately convey the reasoning of the characters you depict, it doesn’t really inform the writer about what your personal message is. And I refuse to admit you set up the whole scene just for the sake of writing. There must be some sort of subtext or message, but I’m totally unable to grasp it.
I am... unsure of what to do with this. Dialogue beats are solid. Needs an editorial pass to clean up some small errors (bending over with a mouth over a grin).
I don't think the overall messaging quite flies with me, but that has more to do with my personal views (joking is a coping mechanism and a tool to deal with the harsh realities of life which does feel distinctly removed from the idea of a product adverting it.) Dunno, something here didn't quite click with me, but I can't actually pin it down yet and I apologize to the author for that. I'll try to revisit this one if I figure it out.
I don't think the overall messaging quite flies with me, but that has more to do with my personal views (joking is a coping mechanism and a tool to deal with the harsh realities of life which does feel distinctly removed from the idea of a product adverting it.) Dunno, something here didn't quite click with me, but I can't actually pin it down yet and I apologize to the author for that. I'll try to revisit this one if I figure it out.
Have you seen this bloody story on Writeoff.me though? Don’t you think it a bit odd that we hate these bloody stories going on and on about suicide in questionable taste, while we ourselves keep writing them every single round? How exactly do we know if they're intended as a joke? Well, we don't, and we can't. I guess we can only see the response they get from the people. It’s the people who eat this stuff up, remember? They’re the ones interested in a story like this. Anyways, I’ll be off now. Gotta get to work.
I still think it's fucked up, though, given the current circumstances our website is in.
I still think it's fucked up, though, given the current circumstances our website is in.
>>Not_A_Hat >>Cassius >>Fenton >>Monokeras >>AndrewRogue
Thanks for the input.
>>Ranmilia
Made me chuckle. Have a +1.
Thanks for the input.
>>Ranmilia
Made me chuckle. Have a +1.