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Gotta Catch at Least One
“Sister!” Luna bellowed as she entered the office. “I have made a decision!”
“Is it about our ‘no ID needed to enroll’ policy?” Celestia asked, barely looking up from the papers on her desk. “Because we really should have addressed that one years ago.”
“Nay, dearest sister, ‘tis much more important than that. I have decided to leave behind this humble life as a vice principal so that I can become a Pokémon Master!”
Celestia continued to examine her paperwork. “I see. Have you been binge-watching anime again?”
“I might have been,” Luna replied with a hint of annoyance. “But I wasn’t watching Pokémon, so that is unrelated.”
“So there’s a new game out then?” Celestia signed a paper and moved it to a new pile. “Well, you do have some leave saved up, so you can go ahead and lock yourself in your room for the next week if you want.”
“I am afraid not, dear sister. For this new game requires me to travel across the land, searching far and wide. Only then shall I be able to catch them all!”
Celestia finally put down her paperwork and gave Luna a suspicious look. “You’re not saying that you have to trek across Equestria for this game, are you?”
“Of course not.”
Celestia sighed in relief. “Oh, good. For a moment there, I thought that—”
“I shall also be leaving Equestria. I cannot let the Pokémon of Griffonstone and Yakyakistan go uncaught if I am to become a Pokémon Master!”
“I see.” Celestia sighed and started to rub her temples. “You’re going to be gone for a lot longer than a week, aren’t you?”
“I shall indeed. I think it is likely that many moons shall pass before I return to Canterlot. That is why I decided to resign as vice principal.”
Celestia stared at the papers on her desk, knowing that they would soon be multiplying. “Fine. But will you please at least stick around until I can find a replacement?”
“Very well, but only because this school is a PokéStop.”
“Hello, Twilight Sparkle. How are you today?”
“Hello, Principal Celestia! I'm so excited to be here! When I heard about Vice Principal Luna leaving, I just knew that I had to apply for the position. The times I had here at CHS were some of the best of my life, and I know that as vice principal, I can help other students feel the same way.”
“That's wonderful, but I haven't even asked you why you want the job yet.”
Twilight grinned sheepishly. “Sorry. I've been studying the interview questions, and I guess I got ahead of myself there.”
“I see.” Celestia pushed aside the paper she was taking notes on and smiled slightly. “In that case, I hope you don't mind if I go off the script a bit.”
Twilight gulped. “You mean you're turning this into a pop quiz?”
“I suppose you could think of it like that. I prefer to think of it as a way to test your adaptability, which is a very important quality to have in this line of work.”
“I suppose that's all right then.”
“Okay. First, tell me how humans walk.”
Twilight's eyes lit up and she sat up straight. “Oh, that's easy. First, the burden of supporting the body's mass is removed from the trailing foot. Then the knee buckles, allowing the ankle tendons to rapidly release their stored elastic energy to swing the leg forward. Then you just keep repeating that process until you get to wherever you need to be.”
“That sounds correct to me. Next question: can you provide proof of your identity and eligibility to work in this country?”
“Huh? I mean, yes, I'm sure that I could, but why do you ask?”
“First of all, the law says I have to. Second, we have to be a bit more strict about that sort of thing with our faculty than we do with our students. And finally, because I'm pretty sure that you are actually a pony princess who should probably not be running away from her responsibilities to get a job in another dimension.”
Twilight began to voice an objection, but Principal Celestia's no-nonsense stare stopped it in her mouth. She dropped her head and sighed. “Okay, you got me. But how did you know I wasn't this world's Twilight Sparkle?”
“How many ponies do you think could describe exactly how they walk with as much detail as you just used?”
“Practically none of—Oh.”
“Exactly. Most humans couldn't tell you how walking works beyond 'you put one foot in front of the other.' If anyone knows more than that, they've probably either been designing robots or studying to make sure they don't mess up.”
“Oops. Can I still have the job though?”
Celestia stared at the next applicant.
The applicant stared back.
Celestia picked up her phone and dialed. “Pinkie Pie, please come remove your pet alligator from my office.”
“Tell me, Ms. Glimmer, why do you want this job?”
“Leadership is my passion. There is nothing I love more than taking a disorganized, inefficient mess of people and guiding them into a united and happy whole.”
This got a small laugh from Celestia. “Well, most high schoolers aren't exactly known for their organization.”
“Perhaps not, but they haven't met me yet,” Starlight replied in a manner that Celestia thought was a bit too serious to use to tell a joke.
“I suppose not.” Celestia glanced over the resume in front of her. “Tell me about your work experience. This says that you were mayor of a town?”
“Yes, that was a wonderful time for me,” Starlight declared proudly. “Because of my wonderful leadership, the entire town lived and worked together in perfect and complete equality.” She then looked away and muttered, “At least until everything came crashing down and everyone left.”
“What was that last bit?”
“Nothing!”
“Riiiight. So would you apply your experiences to the position of vice principal?”
“Well obviously the first thing to do is to eliminate all individuality,” Starlight said confidently. “Everyone must conform and be exactly the same. I'll institute school uniforms, and ban those individual symbols everyone in this school seems to wear for some reason. If they want emblems to wear, they can wear equal signs. In fact, I think the school's mascot should be an equal sign. The students need to know that they are all completely equal and identical.”
“I see. Well, I think that's enough interviewing for now. I'll call you when I make my decision.”
Celestia pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. “Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo, please get out from under that trench coat. That trick never works in real life, and even if it did, you are far too large for it to work now.”
“Sorry, Principal Celestia,” Apple Bloom said as the three disentangled themselves.
“It's just that we've heard Vice Principal Luna say that it feels like she does the work of three people,” Scootaloo added.
“And we're about to graduate,” Sweetie Belle continued, “so we thought that maybe we could replace her when she leaves.
“Look, girls, I know your hearts are in the right places, but you're really not qualified for a job like this.” Though I have to admit that you'd probably do a better job than some applicants I can think of. “Besides, don't you already have other plans for after your graduation?”
“Eh.” Scootaloo shrugged. “Plans are meant to be broken.”
“Why did Vice Principal Luna decide to leave, anyway?” Sweetie asked.
“I don't really understand all the details, but it has something to do with traveling the world for a new Pokémon game. I guess—”
The girls gasped. “Pokémon GO got released?” Scootaloo blurted out. “Why didn't anyone tell us?”
“Girls, we need to get going right now if we want to become Pokémon Masters!” Apple Bloom exclaimed.
“Sorry, Principal Celestia, but we need to withdraw our application,” Sweetie added as all three of them rushed to the door, smartphones in hand. “Thank you anyway!”
Celestia sighed. “Hello again, Twilight.”
Twilight paused. “'Again?'”
“Oh, sorry. Your pony counterpart was in here earlier, trying to apply for this job.” Celestia's eyes narrowed. “You are the human Twilight Sparkle this time, right?”
“Yes, I am. And I have my driver's license, birth certificate, passport, Social Security card, and four different rewards cards to prove it.” As she said this, Twilight pulled each form of identification from one of the many folders she had brought with her and put them on Celestia's desk.
“Yes, I can see that you are definitely our Twilight Sparkle. But why are you applying for this job? Didn't you go off to study magic and science at a prestigious university? This isn't the type job I imagined you aiming for.”
“Yes, but it turns out that the scientific community is not very accepting of the idea of magic, especially when most of it just looks like fancy special effects.”
“Oh. I'm sorry to hear that.”
“It's okay. I still got my degrees and graduated with a perfect GPA.” Twilight pulled several diplomas, transcripts, and a graduation cap out of more of her folders and placed them on the growing pile on Celestia's desk.”
“You still haven't explained why you decided to come back here though.”
“Well, I loved the time I spent here at CHS with my friends. Those were some of the best times of my life, and I know that as vice principal, I can help other students feel the same way.”
“That sounds very...familiar,” Celestia muttered to herself.
“Also, I heard about the other Twilight's first visit to this dimension, and I was sort of hoping that I could live in the library. That's always been something of a dream of mine.”
“I'm sorry to disappoint you, but we can't actually let you do that. That would break more regulations and cause more potential problems than I want to think about.”
Twilight deflated. “Oh. I see. I guess I'll just go work with Sunset in her Magitech R&D lab then.” She gathered up her papers and left the room.
“Oh. Hello, Maud. I wasn't expecting you to apply.”
“Boulder says this would be a good job for me.”
“I see. Didn't you get a degree studying rocks?”
“Yes.”
When it became apparent that Maud was not expound further, Celestia continued. “So why do want to work here? You wouldn't be dealing with many rocks as a vice principal.”
“The grounds here have exhibited a tendency to get torn up every few months. This exposes many interesting rock samples. Also, the statue in front of the school is both a rock and a portal to another dimension. This is worthy of further study. As vice principal, I would be in an ideal location for further examination.”
“I see. Do you have any qualifications that relate to the field of education at all?”
“I write poetry. Would you like to hear some?”
“No, I think that's—”
“Rocks. What is a rock?”
“This really isn't—”
“Me. Am I a rock?”
“You can go now—”
“No. I am no rock.”
“You really don't have—”
“Dream. Become a rock…”
Maud continued as Celestia picked up her phone and dialed. “Pinkie Pie, please come remove your sister from my office.”
“Hi there.”
Celestia looked up and around her office, but couldn't see anyone. On a hunch, she stood up and looked over her desk. She found a purple and green dog staring back at her.
“I heard you have a job opening.”
Celestia sat back down and sighed. “I don't care which dimension's Spike you are. We are not going to have a talking dog as our vice principal.”
Celestia stared at the resumes in front of her. Most of them had a few notes written on them. Some of them just had the word “NO” written across the top in large letters. As she continued to look over them, one fact became increasingly clear. “None of these people—or whatever else—are even half-decent replacements for Luna,” she groaned.
“Sister!” Luna bellowed as she once again entered the office. “I have made another decision!”
“Please tell me that you've decided to stay here.”
“Indeed I have. For I have discovered that the servers are down far too often to make traveling across the world to catch Pokémon worth it.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” Celestia replied as she stood up to give her sister a hug. “I don't know what I would have done without you.”
“Besides,” Luna continued, “I realized that since this school is a PokéStop, the students will probably have lure modules running here all day long. So I can just sit in my office and let all the Pokémon come to me.” Luna smiled triumphantly. “But just to be sure, I've also decided to lift the ban on cellphone use during school.”
“Is it about our ‘no ID needed to enroll’ policy?” Celestia asked, barely looking up from the papers on her desk. “Because we really should have addressed that one years ago.”
“Nay, dearest sister, ‘tis much more important than that. I have decided to leave behind this humble life as a vice principal so that I can become a Pokémon Master!”
Celestia continued to examine her paperwork. “I see. Have you been binge-watching anime again?”
“I might have been,” Luna replied with a hint of annoyance. “But I wasn’t watching Pokémon, so that is unrelated.”
“So there’s a new game out then?” Celestia signed a paper and moved it to a new pile. “Well, you do have some leave saved up, so you can go ahead and lock yourself in your room for the next week if you want.”
“I am afraid not, dear sister. For this new game requires me to travel across the land, searching far and wide. Only then shall I be able to catch them all!”
Celestia finally put down her paperwork and gave Luna a suspicious look. “You’re not saying that you have to trek across Equestria for this game, are you?”
“Of course not.”
Celestia sighed in relief. “Oh, good. For a moment there, I thought that—”
“I shall also be leaving Equestria. I cannot let the Pokémon of Griffonstone and Yakyakistan go uncaught if I am to become a Pokémon Master!”
“I see.” Celestia sighed and started to rub her temples. “You’re going to be gone for a lot longer than a week, aren’t you?”
“I shall indeed. I think it is likely that many moons shall pass before I return to Canterlot. That is why I decided to resign as vice principal.”
Celestia stared at the papers on her desk, knowing that they would soon be multiplying. “Fine. But will you please at least stick around until I can find a replacement?”
“Very well, but only because this school is a PokéStop.”
“Hello, Twilight Sparkle. How are you today?”
“Hello, Principal Celestia! I'm so excited to be here! When I heard about Vice Principal Luna leaving, I just knew that I had to apply for the position. The times I had here at CHS were some of the best of my life, and I know that as vice principal, I can help other students feel the same way.”
“That's wonderful, but I haven't even asked you why you want the job yet.”
Twilight grinned sheepishly. “Sorry. I've been studying the interview questions, and I guess I got ahead of myself there.”
“I see.” Celestia pushed aside the paper she was taking notes on and smiled slightly. “In that case, I hope you don't mind if I go off the script a bit.”
Twilight gulped. “You mean you're turning this into a pop quiz?”
“I suppose you could think of it like that. I prefer to think of it as a way to test your adaptability, which is a very important quality to have in this line of work.”
“I suppose that's all right then.”
“Okay. First, tell me how humans walk.”
Twilight's eyes lit up and she sat up straight. “Oh, that's easy. First, the burden of supporting the body's mass is removed from the trailing foot. Then the knee buckles, allowing the ankle tendons to rapidly release their stored elastic energy to swing the leg forward. Then you just keep repeating that process until you get to wherever you need to be.”
“That sounds correct to me. Next question: can you provide proof of your identity and eligibility to work in this country?”
“Huh? I mean, yes, I'm sure that I could, but why do you ask?”
“First of all, the law says I have to. Second, we have to be a bit more strict about that sort of thing with our faculty than we do with our students. And finally, because I'm pretty sure that you are actually a pony princess who should probably not be running away from her responsibilities to get a job in another dimension.”
Twilight began to voice an objection, but Principal Celestia's no-nonsense stare stopped it in her mouth. She dropped her head and sighed. “Okay, you got me. But how did you know I wasn't this world's Twilight Sparkle?”
“How many ponies do you think could describe exactly how they walk with as much detail as you just used?”
“Practically none of—Oh.”
“Exactly. Most humans couldn't tell you how walking works beyond 'you put one foot in front of the other.' If anyone knows more than that, they've probably either been designing robots or studying to make sure they don't mess up.”
“Oops. Can I still have the job though?”
Celestia stared at the next applicant.
The applicant stared back.
Celestia picked up her phone and dialed. “Pinkie Pie, please come remove your pet alligator from my office.”
“Tell me, Ms. Glimmer, why do you want this job?”
“Leadership is my passion. There is nothing I love more than taking a disorganized, inefficient mess of people and guiding them into a united and happy whole.”
This got a small laugh from Celestia. “Well, most high schoolers aren't exactly known for their organization.”
“Perhaps not, but they haven't met me yet,” Starlight replied in a manner that Celestia thought was a bit too serious to use to tell a joke.
“I suppose not.” Celestia glanced over the resume in front of her. “Tell me about your work experience. This says that you were mayor of a town?”
“Yes, that was a wonderful time for me,” Starlight declared proudly. “Because of my wonderful leadership, the entire town lived and worked together in perfect and complete equality.” She then looked away and muttered, “At least until everything came crashing down and everyone left.”
“What was that last bit?”
“Nothing!”
“Riiiight. So would you apply your experiences to the position of vice principal?”
“Well obviously the first thing to do is to eliminate all individuality,” Starlight said confidently. “Everyone must conform and be exactly the same. I'll institute school uniforms, and ban those individual symbols everyone in this school seems to wear for some reason. If they want emblems to wear, they can wear equal signs. In fact, I think the school's mascot should be an equal sign. The students need to know that they are all completely equal and identical.”
“I see. Well, I think that's enough interviewing for now. I'll call you when I make my decision.”
Celestia pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. “Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo, please get out from under that trench coat. That trick never works in real life, and even if it did, you are far too large for it to work now.”
“Sorry, Principal Celestia,” Apple Bloom said as the three disentangled themselves.
“It's just that we've heard Vice Principal Luna say that it feels like she does the work of three people,” Scootaloo added.
“And we're about to graduate,” Sweetie Belle continued, “so we thought that maybe we could replace her when she leaves.
“Look, girls, I know your hearts are in the right places, but you're really not qualified for a job like this.” Though I have to admit that you'd probably do a better job than some applicants I can think of. “Besides, don't you already have other plans for after your graduation?”
“Eh.” Scootaloo shrugged. “Plans are meant to be broken.”
“Why did Vice Principal Luna decide to leave, anyway?” Sweetie asked.
“I don't really understand all the details, but it has something to do with traveling the world for a new Pokémon game. I guess—”
The girls gasped. “Pokémon GO got released?” Scootaloo blurted out. “Why didn't anyone tell us?”
“Girls, we need to get going right now if we want to become Pokémon Masters!” Apple Bloom exclaimed.
“Sorry, Principal Celestia, but we need to withdraw our application,” Sweetie added as all three of them rushed to the door, smartphones in hand. “Thank you anyway!”
Celestia sighed. “Hello again, Twilight.”
Twilight paused. “'Again?'”
“Oh, sorry. Your pony counterpart was in here earlier, trying to apply for this job.” Celestia's eyes narrowed. “You are the human Twilight Sparkle this time, right?”
“Yes, I am. And I have my driver's license, birth certificate, passport, Social Security card, and four different rewards cards to prove it.” As she said this, Twilight pulled each form of identification from one of the many folders she had brought with her and put them on Celestia's desk.
“Yes, I can see that you are definitely our Twilight Sparkle. But why are you applying for this job? Didn't you go off to study magic and science at a prestigious university? This isn't the type job I imagined you aiming for.”
“Yes, but it turns out that the scientific community is not very accepting of the idea of magic, especially when most of it just looks like fancy special effects.”
“Oh. I'm sorry to hear that.”
“It's okay. I still got my degrees and graduated with a perfect GPA.” Twilight pulled several diplomas, transcripts, and a graduation cap out of more of her folders and placed them on the growing pile on Celestia's desk.”
“You still haven't explained why you decided to come back here though.”
“Well, I loved the time I spent here at CHS with my friends. Those were some of the best times of my life, and I know that as vice principal, I can help other students feel the same way.”
“That sounds very...familiar,” Celestia muttered to herself.
“Also, I heard about the other Twilight's first visit to this dimension, and I was sort of hoping that I could live in the library. That's always been something of a dream of mine.”
“I'm sorry to disappoint you, but we can't actually let you do that. That would break more regulations and cause more potential problems than I want to think about.”
Twilight deflated. “Oh. I see. I guess I'll just go work with Sunset in her Magitech R&D lab then.” She gathered up her papers and left the room.
“Oh. Hello, Maud. I wasn't expecting you to apply.”
“Boulder says this would be a good job for me.”
“I see. Didn't you get a degree studying rocks?”
“Yes.”
When it became apparent that Maud was not expound further, Celestia continued. “So why do want to work here? You wouldn't be dealing with many rocks as a vice principal.”
“The grounds here have exhibited a tendency to get torn up every few months. This exposes many interesting rock samples. Also, the statue in front of the school is both a rock and a portal to another dimension. This is worthy of further study. As vice principal, I would be in an ideal location for further examination.”
“I see. Do you have any qualifications that relate to the field of education at all?”
“I write poetry. Would you like to hear some?”
“No, I think that's—”
“Rocks. What is a rock?”
“This really isn't—”
“Me. Am I a rock?”
“You can go now—”
“No. I am no rock.”
“You really don't have—”
“Dream. Become a rock…”
Maud continued as Celestia picked up her phone and dialed. “Pinkie Pie, please come remove your sister from my office.”
“Hi there.”
Celestia looked up and around her office, but couldn't see anyone. On a hunch, she stood up and looked over her desk. She found a purple and green dog staring back at her.
“I heard you have a job opening.”
Celestia sat back down and sighed. “I don't care which dimension's Spike you are. We are not going to have a talking dog as our vice principal.”
Celestia stared at the resumes in front of her. Most of them had a few notes written on them. Some of them just had the word “NO” written across the top in large letters. As she continued to look over them, one fact became increasingly clear. “None of these people—or whatever else—are even half-decent replacements for Luna,” she groaned.
“Sister!” Luna bellowed as she once again entered the office. “I have made another decision!”
“Please tell me that you've decided to stay here.”
“Indeed I have. For I have discovered that the servers are down far too often to make traveling across the world to catch Pokémon worth it.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” Celestia replied as she stood up to give her sister a hug. “I don't know what I would have done without you.”
“Besides,” Luna continued, “I realized that since this school is a PokéStop, the students will probably have lure modules running here all day long. So I can just sit in my office and let all the Pokémon come to me.” Luna smiled triumphantly. “But just to be sure, I've also decided to lift the ban on cellphone use during school.”
Well, that was definitely supposed to be a comedy. I'm not sure it really hit the right notes for me, though. It was rather odd. ...it also makes me want to get a new phone with enough memory to play Pokemon GO even more now. I may be missing some aspect of the story, not having played it outside of a few minutes' explanation from friends and some time with my brother's phone. I don't know for sure. Making the EqG Luna a gamer!Luna threw me for a bit of a loop--I'd never considered the possibility, I guess? The writing wasn't bad, and you got each character's voice pretty well, but the jokes just didn't make me laugh. This one definitely deserves a "random" tag
Vice Principal Luna doesn’t speak archaically. On the other hand, given the subject matter, I get the feeling that I shouldn’t be thinking about this too hard.
Yup, definitely shouldn’t be thinking about this too hard.
In all, an entertaining bit of nonsense. Not much to it beyond that, but it was still fun. That said, you really need to convey when it's taking place earlier in the story. Still, props for putting the diacritical mark in Pokémon.
Yup, definitely shouldn’t be thinking about this too hard.
In all, an entertaining bit of nonsense. Not much to it beyond that, but it was still fun. That said, you really need to convey when it's taking place earlier in the story. Still, props for putting the diacritical mark in Pokémon.
Heh, good comedy. Good use of running jokes. I'm not too sure why Twilighttwo was turned down for the job, though. She seemed fairly qualified.
But yeah, people!Luna doesn't talk like she came out of a BBC Production of Shakespeare.
But yeah, people!Luna doesn't talk like she came out of a BBC Production of Shakespeare.
>>Posh
I'm not too sure why Twilighttwo was turned down for the job, though. She seemed fairly qualified.She could've had if she wanted it, but not being allowed to live in the library was a dealbreaker.
>>FanOfMostEverything oh, true. I guess I thought Celly let her get away a little too easily though.
A really strong comedy story that hits a really flat note at the end, Gotta' Catch At Least One details Principal Celestia's vain search for a replacement deputy principal. Spoiler: they're all terrible choices. Maud's section in particular is probably one of the funniest things I've read in the Write-Off for a good long while and is an excellent use of a callback joke.
Ultimately the search falls apart with Luna's return and final scene is the weakest part of a very strong story. This is IMO, but straight man comedy relies on the sensible character being bombarded with madness until they succumb and end up as bad as everyone else. This doesn't happen, which is why the last line isn't really funny. I'm going to commit a little bit of a Write-off sin and rewrite the final joke, but more as a way of illustrating what tone this kind of comedic back and forth needs, rather than saying this is what should have happened.
Ultimately the search falls apart with Luna's return and final scene is the weakest part of a very strong story. This is IMO, but straight man comedy relies on the sensible character being bombarded with madness until they succumb and end up as bad as everyone else. This doesn't happen, which is why the last line isn't really funny. I'm going to commit a little bit of a Write-off sin and rewrite the final joke, but more as a way of illustrating what tone this kind of comedic back and forth needs, rather than saying this is what should have happened.
“Sister!” Luna bellowed as she once again entered the office. “I have made another decision!”
"Really?" Celestia said, not looking up from her papers. "Have you decided to stay?"
“Indeed I have. For I have discovered that the servers are down far too often to make traveling across the world to catch Pokémon worth it.”
Celestia resisted rolling her eyes. "Well, that might be a problem. You see, sister, I already hired a replacement."
"A replacement!" Luna exclaimed. "How? Who?" Her eyes narrowed. "They're not Team Instinct, are they?"
"Oh, it was a difficult choice. But I'm confident I made the right decision."
Sat on the vice-principal's desk Gummy blinked once. No one was quite sure where he'd gotten the tie.
This was a good laugh, but it feels incomplete since it doesn't feature Mrs. Harshwhinney coming out of Equestria to fill the position. Maybe you could've added Fluttershy's brother too, just applying to spent his days in a hammock. CMC and Spike are the weakest parts, and maybe you should think about replacing them by something else.
“I see. Didn't you get a degree studying rocks?”That's called geology. :P
The only thing this story needs is changlin|mposter reading it with ridiculous and inappropriately comical voices. Unfortunately, I think I was the only one who heard it, and it didn't get recorded.
On a more serious note, I think that the comedy here mostly works pretty well, though some parts could use a bit of work. Starlight's part wasn't necessarily funny by itself, but it did benefit from how clearly terrible she was. Twilight might have been the weakest one in my opinion. It's hardly ridiculous at all, and would work just as well if the story was trying to be serious. But I suppose that putting it first does let the rest of the story escalate, so I guess it's okay.
I thought the rest of the parts were good, and the story as a whole turned out well.
On a more serious note, I think that the comedy here mostly works pretty well, though some parts could use a bit of work. Starlight's part wasn't necessarily funny by itself, but it did benefit from how clearly terrible she was. Twilight might have been the weakest one in my opinion. It's hardly ridiculous at all, and would work just as well if the story was trying to be serious. But I suppose that putting it first does let the rest of the story escalate, so I guess it's okay.
I thought the rest of the parts were good, and the story as a whole turned out well.
Well, at least the title let me know what I was in for before the fad/comedy thing started. Sadly, like a lot of fics based around recent real-world fads, the premise is shaky at best. Luna decides to leave for reason XXXX, and XXXX just happens to be Pokemon go this time. But it could just as easily be she was leaving to: learn Tibetian yoga, go to comic-con, follow the Grateful Dead on tour, compete on Iron Chef, solve the mystery of the Mary Celeste, etc. Basically, insert-author's-hobby-here, and it's the same story.
The rest is a montage comedy of interviews. A few funny moments there—the callback to "come get ______ out of my office" with Gummy and then Maud was especially amusing. I also got a small laugh out of the talking dog bit. The rest of the comedy fell very flat to me, mostly because it was so predictable. The ending unfortunately suffers the same problem. Luna returns for YYYY reason, and YYYY is the only reference/joke really related to the title and initial premise of Pokemon.
I give points for effort here, but as a comedy only piece, with no plot or character arcs to speak of, the comedy really needed to be a lot stronger to carry the whole thing.
The rest is a montage comedy of interviews. A few funny moments there—the callback to "come get ______ out of my office" with Gummy and then Maud was especially amusing. I also got a small laugh out of the talking dog bit. The rest of the comedy fell very flat to me, mostly because it was so predictable. The ending unfortunately suffers the same problem. Luna returns for YYYY reason, and YYYY is the only reference/joke really related to the title and initial premise of Pokemon.
I give points for effort here, but as a comedy only piece, with no plot or character arcs to speak of, the comedy really needed to be a lot stronger to carry the whole thing.