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Cold Water · Poetry Minific ·
Organised by Anon Y Mous
Word limit 15–1000
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Slow Nice Sleeping
hard and slippery this path
treachery waiting to break now
too hard yet too brittle
our sun's light weakens this
floor of sleeping life's mother
still it beats back the
hoard that never stops eating
and keeps the bread fresh
for all our daily routine
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#1 ·
· · >>Light_Striker
I think this is about... dirt? The ground?
#2 ·
· · >>Super_Trampoline
>>Super_Trampoline
I believe it's about ice used for refrigeration. Edited to add: Though it could be ice-as-ground, a frozen-over body of water.
#3 ·
·
>>Light_Striker
Yeah, I guess that makes sense.
#4 ·
·
clear and amorphous this work
gauging its topic from angles
hard-packed yet evocative
choice of words strengthens this
wall of lowercase letters
lines are beats for the
ease of purposeful reading
it keeps the sound fresh
for that: top of the octave
#5 ·
·
I'm afraid this went over my head. I don't know what the "sleeping life's mother" is. The rest kind of seemed to be reaching for something existential, but if the other commenters are right, then it's just listing functions of ice, similar to "Water." Not bad. Maybe it just doesn't click with me.
#6 ·
·
icy path divides,
sun warmed surface slick
leading in its own directions
you may wind up elsewhere
with a single footstep