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From That Day Forth, God's Hand Was Orange
One shot down the throat, bounces off the heart, rips up the carotid artery and into the brain. Cerebrum explodes, circuits fried, blood bursts like oil from a burning well. A life (your own?) passes before your eyes.
A quiet funeral. Friends and family say goodbye, but you don’t leave.
Peregrination. Pilgrimage without destination. You cross the world. You cross the world again. The world is a crossing guard waving you on, on, on. Keep going. Don’t stop here. Don’t stay here. You stop anyway.
You drift into a picturesque suburban home. Blue panelled walls. White picket fence. Green lawn. Pleasant neighbors. A young couple lives in the home. They say they want nothing to do with you. There is a reason no one wants a poltergeist around. You stay anyway.
It is a quiet home. The couple says little to one another, but they hold hands every morning while brushing their teeth. You see love here and you crave it.
You stand at the foot of their bed while they sleep, watching. Their feet stick out from beneath the sheets. Her toenails are painted grey and you feel grey. In the dark, all colors are grey. They begin keeping a bedside lamp on at night but that only enables you to see them more clearly. In the light you find that her toenails are really painted orange and you feel orange. You feel citrus sweet and vitamin c cold resistant. You lean down in the dead of night and put your lips around her left foot and suck. When you back away, her left foot is orange.
Come evenings, you sit with them at the dinner table. You sit in the same chair every night. Your chair is orange. They hold hands beneath the table. They exchange looks. They pretend not to see you. They say grace. They beg God to take you away. God stoops to the earth and bends down over the picturesque suburban home and glares at you through a window with a shining golden sunbeam eye. God reaches a mighty godly hand through the window pane and wraps you in a fist. God pulls his hand away and you are still sitting, and God’s hand is orange.
The couple are alone with you. They are worried, but she smiles mysteriously at him and her lips are orange. He looks at her mysteriously and his eyes are orange.
You sit at the dinner table for months, years, maybe longer. The couple ignores you until one night the husband asks (was it exhaustion? compassion? insanity?) for someone to pass the salt and he is not asking his orange-footed, orange-lipped wife.
You grab the salt shaker. It flies through the air, twirls like a ballerina, geysers orange salt across the walls. There is a reason no one wants a poltergeist around.
The couple begins leaving the bedside lamp off at night, and the room is still orange. You are nestled between the sheets between their feet. Soon you are so big that only you fit on the bed and they sleep on the floor. They hold hands with you while brushing their teeth and their teeth are orange. You are so big that your head hits the ceiling and they are so small they have to stand on step stools to reach the sink.
They can’t help themselves. They would do anything else, be anyone else if they could. You live the only way you know. You do not want to be alone. You would leave if you could. They sit underneath the table every night and hold hands with you while you eat oranges for dinner.
The couple is fading. His arms are translucent. Her teeth are gone. His toenails are missing. Her orange waisted liver is failing. You can see right through the skin of his chest and his heart is plaque-stained orange.
They hire a priest. They buy a ouija board. They burn incense. They eat balanced meals. They exercise regularly. They take a multivitamin. They rub olive oil into their skin. They do a rain dance. They wear moccasins and tie plastic feathers to their hair. They howl and scream and shout at you. They call you names. They froth at the mouth. Too late. They get smaller and smaller and then they are gone.
You are healthy and big. You live in a picturesque suburban home. Orange picket fence. Orange lawn. Pleasant neighbors.
There is a reason no one wants a poltergeist around.
A quiet funeral. Friends and family say goodbye, but you don’t leave.
Peregrination. Pilgrimage without destination. You cross the world. You cross the world again. The world is a crossing guard waving you on, on, on. Keep going. Don’t stop here. Don’t stay here. You stop anyway.
You drift into a picturesque suburban home. Blue panelled walls. White picket fence. Green lawn. Pleasant neighbors. A young couple lives in the home. They say they want nothing to do with you. There is a reason no one wants a poltergeist around. You stay anyway.
It is a quiet home. The couple says little to one another, but they hold hands every morning while brushing their teeth. You see love here and you crave it.
You stand at the foot of their bed while they sleep, watching. Their feet stick out from beneath the sheets. Her toenails are painted grey and you feel grey. In the dark, all colors are grey. They begin keeping a bedside lamp on at night but that only enables you to see them more clearly. In the light you find that her toenails are really painted orange and you feel orange. You feel citrus sweet and vitamin c cold resistant. You lean down in the dead of night and put your lips around her left foot and suck. When you back away, her left foot is orange.
Come evenings, you sit with them at the dinner table. You sit in the same chair every night. Your chair is orange. They hold hands beneath the table. They exchange looks. They pretend not to see you. They say grace. They beg God to take you away. God stoops to the earth and bends down over the picturesque suburban home and glares at you through a window with a shining golden sunbeam eye. God reaches a mighty godly hand through the window pane and wraps you in a fist. God pulls his hand away and you are still sitting, and God’s hand is orange.
The couple are alone with you. They are worried, but she smiles mysteriously at him and her lips are orange. He looks at her mysteriously and his eyes are orange.
You sit at the dinner table for months, years, maybe longer. The couple ignores you until one night the husband asks (was it exhaustion? compassion? insanity?) for someone to pass the salt and he is not asking his orange-footed, orange-lipped wife.
You grab the salt shaker. It flies through the air, twirls like a ballerina, geysers orange salt across the walls. There is a reason no one wants a poltergeist around.
The couple begins leaving the bedside lamp off at night, and the room is still orange. You are nestled between the sheets between their feet. Soon you are so big that only you fit on the bed and they sleep on the floor. They hold hands with you while brushing their teeth and their teeth are orange. You are so big that your head hits the ceiling and they are so small they have to stand on step stools to reach the sink.
They can’t help themselves. They would do anything else, be anyone else if they could. You live the only way you know. You do not want to be alone. You would leave if you could. They sit underneath the table every night and hold hands with you while you eat oranges for dinner.
The couple is fading. His arms are translucent. Her teeth are gone. His toenails are missing. Her orange waisted liver is failing. You can see right through the skin of his chest and his heart is plaque-stained orange.
They hire a priest. They buy a ouija board. They burn incense. They eat balanced meals. They exercise regularly. They take a multivitamin. They rub olive oil into their skin. They do a rain dance. They wear moccasins and tie plastic feathers to their hair. They howl and scream and shout at you. They call you names. They froth at the mouth. Too late. They get smaller and smaller and then they are gone.
You are healthy and big. You live in a picturesque suburban home. Orange picket fence. Orange lawn. Pleasant neighbors.
There is a reason no one wants a poltergeist around.
On first reading the title, my mind immediately went to the idea of God eating Cheetos.
What we actually got, um, I'm not really sure. On the upside, the prose is pretty. The words have a nice meter and flow, and the scenes they paint are vivid. What the scenes actually are, though, I'm afraid I just don't follow. Maybe there's some meta or another layer of symbolism that I'm not getting.
I'm not particularly well versed in literature, but I can't help but wonder if the author wasn't influenced by Bad Horse's recent post on modernism.
Color me confused.
What we actually got, um, I'm not really sure. On the upside, the prose is pretty. The words have a nice meter and flow, and the scenes they paint are vivid. What the scenes actually are, though, I'm afraid I just don't follow. Maybe there's some meta or another layer of symbolism that I'm not getting.
I'm not particularly well versed in literature, but I can't help but wonder if the author wasn't influenced by Bad Horse's recent post on modernism.
Color me confused.
First thought: aaaaargh second person. :/
Second thought: What the what?
Final thought: Pleasant enough word-salad, I guess, but trying to extract meaning from this feels like looking for cloud shapes. It's mildly entertaining, but it's all fluff and illusion, with no actual form or substance.
Second thought: What the what?
Final thought: Pleasant enough word-salad, I guess, but trying to extract meaning from this feels like looking for cloud shapes. It's mildly entertaining, but it's all fluff and illusion, with no actual form or substance.
The second person in this is used well. I hope nobody votes this down because of a kneejerk/subconscious reaction to it.
Is it possible the orange itself has no special meaning, but rather it's just color in general that carries meaning? Or maybe this ghost is just named Clyde.
Is it possible the orange itself has no special meaning, but rather it's just color in general that carries meaning? Or maybe this ghost is just named Clyde.
This story is vaguely interesting but, as someone else noted, it is kind of modernist. In the end, I'm not really left with a strong sense of what it all means/was meant to say. In particular, I don't get the orange. Why orange? What's the significance?
I'm not left really understanding what is going on here.
I'm not left really understanding what is going on here.
I love the use of second person in this! Very well done, matches and assists the dissociated, metaphorical tone of the piece. The prose flows like water, easy to read and follow. Great stuff there.
Unfortunately, I love what the prose actually says quite a bit less. I don't get it. Why orange? What's God got to do with it, and why is the poltergeist more powerful than God? Why doesn't the couple just move out? Is it all just a metaphor? If so, what for, beyond normal suburban life? Ah, I wanted to get to these early to avoid being "yeah what all the other comments already said," but... what all the other comments already said.
It is a story and does complete a narrative arc, props for that, and for the aforementioned tone and flow. I needa da pizza, though, and by da pizza, I mean the meaning behind the metaphor. So this is going to wind up around "not a trainwreck, but kind of a failed experiment" tier for me. Thank you for writing, though, and seriously, well done with the second person!
Unfortunately, I love what the prose actually says quite a bit less. I don't get it. Why orange? What's God got to do with it, and why is the poltergeist more powerful than God? Why doesn't the couple just move out? Is it all just a metaphor? If so, what for, beyond normal suburban life? Ah, I wanted to get to these early to avoid being "yeah what all the other comments already said," but... what all the other comments already said.
It is a story and does complete a narrative arc, props for that, and for the aforementioned tone and flow. I needa da pizza, though, and by da pizza, I mean the meaning behind the metaphor. So this is going to wind up around "not a trainwreck, but kind of a failed experiment" tier for me. Thank you for writing, though, and seriously, well done with the second person!
I agree with the others, we have a lovely prose here, but the meaning is far too obfuscated.
Nonetheless I will try an interpretation of this story.
We have somebody dying, and then a part of them infesting the life of a young couple, coloring everything the poltergeist touches, determining their lives and, at the end, consuming them.
If we go for the metaphorical then my first guess would be an illness transmitted through organ transplantation. It would match the previously listed characteristics and would explain why they try to exorcise through healthy living. It wouldn't explain the last paragraph, though, so I'm less convinced about this interpretation than during my first read of the story.
The second possibility is that we are talking about a political idea. In which case you would have biting satire if we saw the effects of the orange touch. This would make more sense if we consider the failing liver and the missing teeth as a metaphorical image used for the losing of self. My problem here is that if this is the correct way to read it, then you are simply saying that on idea is bad without explaining way and comparing it taint. I'm not convinced this is the case either, because even if it matches everything the prose shows experience in writing, so such a blunt statement seems improbable.
The third possible interpretation is that the story is not metaphorical, that the poltergeist is a poltergeist and that it consumes slowly everything it touches. It makes the story creepy and dark, but then I don't get the color orange.
So, lovely prose, but you need to give us a key to understand the story. Still, thank you for writing it, as I think we will get an interesting discussion out of it.
Nonetheless I will try an interpretation of this story.
We have somebody dying, and then a part of them infesting the life of a young couple, coloring everything the poltergeist touches, determining their lives and, at the end, consuming them.
If we go for the metaphorical then my first guess would be an illness transmitted through organ transplantation. It would match the previously listed characteristics and would explain why they try to exorcise through healthy living. It wouldn't explain the last paragraph, though, so I'm less convinced about this interpretation than during my first read of the story.
The second possibility is that we are talking about a political idea. In which case you would have biting satire if we saw the effects of the orange touch. This would make more sense if we consider the failing liver and the missing teeth as a metaphorical image used for the losing of self. My problem here is that if this is the correct way to read it, then you are simply saying that on idea is bad without explaining way and comparing it taint. I'm not convinced this is the case either, because even if it matches everything the prose shows experience in writing, so such a blunt statement seems improbable.
The third possible interpretation is that the story is not metaphorical, that the poltergeist is a poltergeist and that it consumes slowly everything it touches. It makes the story creepy and dark, but then I don't get the color orange.
So, lovely prose, but you need to give us a key to understand the story. Still, thank you for writing it, as I think we will get an interesting discussion out of it.
That was quite the story. I see that many have tried to get something from it and I’ll do the same but first, my overall opinion on the story. (Before we start, I must warn you. This review is gonna be long so if you don’t want to read it just skip to the conclusion part)
It is good, it is very good. Second person is something I usually avoid because the stories are often self-insert and wish-fulfillments only. It is also the cheapest way to get your reader to care about what you write by directly speaking to him. But here, the ‘you’ isn’t really a character, it’s a presence. The reader is quickly informed that he doesn’t really belong in this story.
With that line, the story tells us that we aren’t really sure that the life that has ended is ours. So the ‘you’ is weaken, it’s not a strong character that will play important in the story. And yet…
This is a direct address to the ‘you’. ‘You’ doesn’t want to leave, ‘you’ wants to stay despite the narrator’s orders. My meta sense is tingling right now but it’s not the only thing to get from these lines (we’ll get back to that later).
From this point, I’m gonna call the ‘you’ the poltergeist. So the poltergeist decides to settle in a nice suburban home where lives a couple.
Instead of keeping on following the story, let’s focus on two sentences which stood out for me and, I think, sum up the whole story.
First, there is undoubtedly a sexual connotation with foot licking. It’s not something you casually do to greet your friends. It’s something intimate and that’s why this sentence was very jarring the first time I read it, without forgetting that there’s nothing sexual involved after that. With that connotation comes the colour orange. We can assume, without a doubt, that the action of licking has caused the foot to turn orange.
So what could it mean? Don’t be so hasty, there are more pieces to connect together before reaching a conclusion so try to bear with me.
I think we should now focus on what’s orange instead of focusing on why the colour orange. The first mention of this colour is with the foot but before, we have that:
So at first, everything is grey but it’s because of the poltergeist action (licking the foot) that things start to turn orange. God’s hand will turn orange, the woman’s lips and the man’s eyes too. And in the end, everything turns orange.
The poltergeist is infecting the house and its occupants. Even God is powerless against him. He’s not only powerless, but he becomes infected too. The couple will vainly try futile things to get rid of the poltergeist.
But in the end, the poltergeist wins. He takes more and more place, getting bigger and bigger and at the opposite, the couple gets smaller and smaller. He becomes the true occupant of the house, he is everywhere.
There are other sentences to link together.
So the poltergeist literally put himself between the man and the woman, putting more and more distance between them while he becomes bigger.
Now that’s for the first meaning of the story. What about the symbolism? Well, I’m still not sure but I think the poltergeist and the colour orange represent the suspicion of infidelity. Notice how the first things to turn orange are parts of the body connected to sexuality and love. It starts with the foot and it continues with the woman’s lips and the man’s eyes. The man sees on his wife’s lips the prints of infidelity. Thus, his eyes are orange and her lips too, they are both infected by suspicion. They try to leave it to God to save them but even God is powerless against suspicion. Once the little worm has started digging its hole, it’s too late, there is no turning back.
If you agree with my interpretation, I let you link the other pieces together and look for how all the symbolism plays around many concepts.
CONCLUSION
And now my review comes to its end. There could be more to say but I think you got my point, and thus, I’ll spare you a 2.000 words review.
By its length, you, author, probably have guessed how I received the story but in any case, know that this story is a top contender without a single doubt.
You’ve managed to deliver such a powerful metaphor without forgetting telling a story, and all that with such a few words. You truly deserve the first place for me but even if you don’t win, know that you’ve won both my heart and my mind.
Big round of applause.
It is good, it is very good. Second person is something I usually avoid because the stories are often self-insert and wish-fulfillments only. It is also the cheapest way to get your reader to care about what you write by directly speaking to him. But here, the ‘you’ isn’t really a character, it’s a presence. The reader is quickly informed that he doesn’t really belong in this story.
A life (your own?) passes before your eyes.
With that line, the story tells us that we aren’t really sure that the life that has ended is ours. So the ‘you’ is weaken, it’s not a strong character that will play important in the story. And yet…
you don’t leave.
Keep going. Don’t stop here. Don’t stay here. You stop anyway.
This is a direct address to the ‘you’. ‘You’ doesn’t want to leave, ‘you’ wants to stay despite the narrator’s orders. My meta sense is tingling right now but it’s not the only thing to get from these lines (we’ll get back to that later).
From this point, I’m gonna call the ‘you’ the poltergeist. So the poltergeist decides to settle in a nice suburban home where lives a couple.
Instead of keeping on following the story, let’s focus on two sentences which stood out for me and, I think, sum up the whole story.
You lean down in the dead of night and put your lips around her left foot and suck. When you back away, her left foot is orange.
First, there is undoubtedly a sexual connotation with foot licking. It’s not something you casually do to greet your friends. It’s something intimate and that’s why this sentence was very jarring the first time I read it, without forgetting that there’s nothing sexual involved after that. With that connotation comes the colour orange. We can assume, without a doubt, that the action of licking has caused the foot to turn orange.
So what could it mean? Don’t be so hasty, there are more pieces to connect together before reaching a conclusion so try to bear with me.
I think we should now focus on what’s orange instead of focusing on why the colour orange. The first mention of this colour is with the foot but before, we have that:
Her toenails are painted grey and you feel grey. In the dark, all colors are grey.
So at first, everything is grey but it’s because of the poltergeist action (licking the foot) that things start to turn orange. God’s hand will turn orange, the woman’s lips and the man’s eyes too. And in the end, everything turns orange.
the room is still orange
The poltergeist is infecting the house and its occupants. Even God is powerless against him. He’s not only powerless, but he becomes infected too. The couple will vainly try futile things to get rid of the poltergeist.
They hire a priest. They buy a ouija board. They burn incense. They eat balanced meals. They exercise regularly. They take a multivitamin. They rub olive oil into their skin. They do a rain dance. They wear moccasins and tie plastic feathers to their hair. They howl and scream and shout at you. They call you names. They froth at the mouth.
But in the end, the poltergeist wins. He takes more and more place, getting bigger and bigger and at the opposite, the couple gets smaller and smaller. He becomes the true occupant of the house, he is everywhere.
There are other sentences to link together.
they hold hands every morning while brushing their teeth
They hold hands with you while brushing their teeth
only you fit on the bed and they sleep on the floor
So the poltergeist literally put himself between the man and the woman, putting more and more distance between them while he becomes bigger.
Now that’s for the first meaning of the story. What about the symbolism? Well, I’m still not sure but I think the poltergeist and the colour orange represent the suspicion of infidelity. Notice how the first things to turn orange are parts of the body connected to sexuality and love. It starts with the foot and it continues with the woman’s lips and the man’s eyes. The man sees on his wife’s lips the prints of infidelity. Thus, his eyes are orange and her lips too, they are both infected by suspicion. They try to leave it to God to save them but even God is powerless against suspicion. Once the little worm has started digging its hole, it’s too late, there is no turning back.
If you agree with my interpretation, I let you link the other pieces together and look for how all the symbolism plays around many concepts.
CONCLUSION
And now my review comes to its end. There could be more to say but I think you got my point, and thus, I’ll spare you a 2.000 words review.
By its length, you, author, probably have guessed how I received the story but in any case, know that this story is a top contender without a single doubt.
You’ve managed to deliver such a powerful metaphor without forgetting telling a story, and all that with such a few words. You truly deserve the first place for me but even if you don’t win, know that you’ve won both my heart and my mind.
Big round of applause.
>>Fenton Actually... the woman's toenails are orange before the poltergeist licks her foot. They just look gray until they start leaving the bedside lamp on.
And while your conclusions of the poltergeist representing infidelity make just about as much sense as any explanation, it doesn't really tie into certain parts of the story very well. The funeral at the beginning, for example, or the orange salt. Salt isn't a symbol for anything sexual that I've heard of. (I mean, it probably is for someone somewhere, but yeah. Not like feet.)
The ending especially makes very little sense to me in relation to infidelity. These people are apparently, at this point, working together to defeat the poltergeist, which they treat more like a physical/spiritual ailment than a relationship one:
Multivitamins for infidelity?
And despite that, it still replaces them:
And that makes no sense to me, as far as infidelity goes. How can infidelity, as an abstract concept, own a house and lawn and have nice neighbors all by itself? A house might be famous enough for a killing to say it was 'owned by murder', but I don't think infidelity is a strong enough concept to say the same thing.
I dunno. I appreciate the effort you've taken to try and extract a metaphor from this, but I don't think I can agree with your interpretation.
They begin keeping a bedside lamp on at night but that only enables you to see them more clearly. In the light you find that her toenails are really painted orange and you feel orange.
And while your conclusions of the poltergeist representing infidelity make just about as much sense as any explanation, it doesn't really tie into certain parts of the story very well. The funeral at the beginning, for example, or the orange salt. Salt isn't a symbol for anything sexual that I've heard of. (I mean, it probably is for someone somewhere, but yeah. Not like feet.)
The ending especially makes very little sense to me in relation to infidelity. These people are apparently, at this point, working together to defeat the poltergeist, which they treat more like a physical/spiritual ailment than a relationship one:
They hire a priest. They buy a ouija board. They burn incense. They eat balanced meals. They exercise regularly. They take a multivitamin. They rub olive oil into their skin. They do a rain dance. They wear moccasins and tie plastic feathers to their hair. They howl and scream and shout at you. They call you names. They froth at the mouth. Too late.
Multivitamins for infidelity?
And despite that, it still replaces them:
They get smaller and smaller and then they are gone.
And that makes no sense to me, as far as infidelity goes. How can infidelity, as an abstract concept, own a house and lawn and have nice neighbors all by itself? A house might be famous enough for a killing to say it was 'owned by murder', but I don't think infidelity is a strong enough concept to say the same thing.
I dunno. I appreciate the effort you've taken to try and extract a metaphor from this, but I don't think I can agree with your interpretation.
Time for me to throw my hat into the ring on this story. Most stories in the Writeoff are pretty straightforward in how they are supposed to be read and don't offer many divergences in interpretation, so on the immediate plus side, this story gives us something to discuss. On the other hand, I don't really like stories written in a "you bring your own interpretation to it, man" style, which I think this ultimately avoids, but sort of appears to fall into the kind of genre. Knowing exactly what the color orange means and exactly what the poltergeist does to the couple in the story isn't exactly imperative to understanding the story's proceedings, but it's nice to be able to read into and understand the subtext that causes events to occur.
I think perhaps the second-person style, while engaging, obfuscates the metaphorical implications of the poltergeist and the color orange, and as far as I can tell, the "you" in the story could just be swapped with the "the poltergeist" without losing much meaning. I've tried to link back how I or a person generally being addressed could fit in the mantle of the poltergeist, and I haven't really found a satisfactory interpretation. Unless >>Fenton is right, and I suppose that there is a case that it is supposed to be read in sort of an accusatory tone.
Now onto the crux of things, where we examine what the color orange is supposed to mean and the poltergeist means. On my first reading, I felt that the orange was basically a substitute for the general idea of death, disease, and all things dreadful, and indeed, it is easy to read that as the overall intention, with no specific aim for the color orange other than a general concept. Orange is the by-product of draining something, contaminating it, making it fall ill, and I think >>Fenton ultimately is in the right ideological ballpark with the "infidelity" interpretation, but I think he also misses the mark in some respects. Additionally, I think >>Not_A_Hat is missing the point in that the literal consequences of the poltergeist is interchangeable with the metaphorical subtext.
There are many lines that indicate to me that the poltergeist takes on the qualities of an emotional vampire or corrupter, and I think the fact that his victims are a young couple is not a coincidence by the author. To express the poltergeist's motivations, we have but this line:
The poltergeist's ultimate intentions are to drain the love from the couple. Its intentions are not exactly malicious or malignant, but it is entirely apathetic to the suffering it brings. In terms of understanding the poltergeist as a metaphorical actor, the poltergeist is something that comes between the young couple, that corrupts their affections for each other, and ultimately lays them to waste. You, the poltergeist, are an elephant in the room. You are the thing getting in the way.
Now, >>Not_A_Hat mentions:
I may have to jump through some hoops to explain this, but, essentially, my idea is that the poltergeist is drawn to the couple in the first place because there is a tinge of corruption / infidelity / what have you in them to begin with. The poltergeist doesn't start changing things orange on his own, he only starts when he notices the orange on the lady's toenail. From then on, things only get worse and escalate.
Again, there are a lot of details I feel strengthen >>Fenton's interpretation that he hasn't exactly mentioned. Sucking on the foot is sexual, yes, but starting to sit at the dinner table, as if he were part of the family, again speaks to an elephant in the room coming between the young couple. Something that is inescapable and haunts the time that they are together.
The couple's response and how the couples changes from what they are previously established as is important here. At first, they pretend not to see the poltergeist, and they essentially ignore the problem. The specific places that become orange on the couple are important: lips and eyes. Lips, obviously for the kissing component, eyes for the wandering gaze of looking somewhere else. They sleep apart, while the poltergeist dominates the bed (sexual), they hold hands with poltergeist instead of each other (relationship decay), and eventually the problem becomes so big that the poltergeist dominates the house.
Again, as >>Not_A_Hat points out, the couple literally dying due to this doesn't make much sense in the context of seeing the poltergeist as a metaphorical actor, unless you go for the broadest possible interpretation and say that the infidelity destroyed the couple, but I think that is still conceivable, and makes sense if you are examining the poltergeist as a literal actor that drains the world around him. I think delineating the poltergeist as a metaphor and as a ghost helps when trying to understand why things happen in this story. Same with calling help for god, or getting a Ouija board—not a solution for a metaphorical poltergeist, but a solution for an actual poltergeist.
Of course, this infidelity interpretation isn't exactly bulletproof, partially I think due to the fact that whatever the author's intentions were with the color orange and the poltergeist, he left a little too much up to interpretation, but I think that it is the best thing proposed so far, and I would go as far as to say that the sexual component and break down of a young couple in regards to a failed marriage is a major component of the subtext in this story. There is obviously something going on here in regards to how something splits young love in two and destroys it. In a more Biblical and antiquated sense, spirits used to be thought of as part of the reasons people committed sins, and that might be playing to that angle. Still not 100% certain.
So what ultimately did I think of this? Well it doesn't matter because it's not on my slate fuck me right I just wasted my time typing all of this up or at least until the finals because it will make it; I am confident in that . Well, it's got a leg up on most other stories in terms of prose construction, and the idea is pretty intriguing. Even reading it straight without any examination into the subtext, it's a nice little horror piece. So it gets some props. It's a rewarding enough to reread to try to figure out what the hell you were going for and make a large ass post trying to discover its meaning. I'd say it's pretty solid all things considered, but there is a criminal lack of signposting to signal the author's intentions here. So it sort of comes across as a monument to nothing, when in fact there is something glittering underneath, just outside the definite grasp of the reader.
I think perhaps the second-person style, while engaging, obfuscates the metaphorical implications of the poltergeist and the color orange, and as far as I can tell, the "you" in the story could just be swapped with the "the poltergeist" without losing much meaning. I've tried to link back how I or a person generally being addressed could fit in the mantle of the poltergeist, and I haven't really found a satisfactory interpretation. Unless >>Fenton is right, and I suppose that there is a case that it is supposed to be read in sort of an accusatory tone.
Now onto the crux of things, where we examine what the color orange is supposed to mean and the poltergeist means. On my first reading, I felt that the orange was basically a substitute for the general idea of death, disease, and all things dreadful, and indeed, it is easy to read that as the overall intention, with no specific aim for the color orange other than a general concept. Orange is the by-product of draining something, contaminating it, making it fall ill, and I think >>Fenton ultimately is in the right ideological ballpark with the "infidelity" interpretation, but I think he also misses the mark in some respects. Additionally, I think >>Not_A_Hat is missing the point in that the literal consequences of the poltergeist is interchangeable with the metaphorical subtext.
There are many lines that indicate to me that the poltergeist takes on the qualities of an emotional vampire or corrupter, and I think the fact that his victims are a young couple is not a coincidence by the author. To express the poltergeist's motivations, we have but this line:
You see love here and you crave it.
The poltergeist's ultimate intentions are to drain the love from the couple. Its intentions are not exactly malicious or malignant, but it is entirely apathetic to the suffering it brings. In terms of understanding the poltergeist as a metaphorical actor, the poltergeist is something that comes between the young couple, that corrupts their affections for each other, and ultimately lays them to waste. You, the poltergeist, are an elephant in the room. You are the thing getting in the way.
Now, >>Not_A_Hat mentions:
Actually... the woman's toenails are orange before the poltergeist licks her foot. They just look gray until they start leaving the bedside lamp on.
I may have to jump through some hoops to explain this, but, essentially, my idea is that the poltergeist is drawn to the couple in the first place because there is a tinge of corruption / infidelity / what have you in them to begin with. The poltergeist doesn't start changing things orange on his own, he only starts when he notices the orange on the lady's toenail. From then on, things only get worse and escalate.
Again, there are a lot of details I feel strengthen >>Fenton's interpretation that he hasn't exactly mentioned. Sucking on the foot is sexual, yes, but starting to sit at the dinner table, as if he were part of the family, again speaks to an elephant in the room coming between the young couple. Something that is inescapable and haunts the time that they are together.
The couple's response and how the couples changes from what they are previously established as is important here. At first, they pretend not to see the poltergeist, and they essentially ignore the problem. The specific places that become orange on the couple are important: lips and eyes. Lips, obviously for the kissing component, eyes for the wandering gaze of looking somewhere else. They sleep apart, while the poltergeist dominates the bed (sexual), they hold hands with poltergeist instead of each other (relationship decay), and eventually the problem becomes so big that the poltergeist dominates the house.
Again, as >>Not_A_Hat points out, the couple literally dying due to this doesn't make much sense in the context of seeing the poltergeist as a metaphorical actor, unless you go for the broadest possible interpretation and say that the infidelity destroyed the couple, but I think that is still conceivable, and makes sense if you are examining the poltergeist as a literal actor that drains the world around him. I think delineating the poltergeist as a metaphor and as a ghost helps when trying to understand why things happen in this story. Same with calling help for god, or getting a Ouija board—not a solution for a metaphorical poltergeist, but a solution for an actual poltergeist.
Of course, this infidelity interpretation isn't exactly bulletproof, partially I think due to the fact that whatever the author's intentions were with the color orange and the poltergeist, he left a little too much up to interpretation, but I think that it is the best thing proposed so far, and I would go as far as to say that the sexual component and break down of a young couple in regards to a failed marriage is a major component of the subtext in this story. There is obviously something going on here in regards to how something splits young love in two and destroys it. In a more Biblical and antiquated sense, spirits used to be thought of as part of the reasons people committed sins, and that might be playing to that angle. Still not 100% certain.
So what ultimately did I think of this? Well it doesn't matter because it's not on my slate fuck me right I just wasted my time typing all of this up or at least until the finals because it will make it; I am confident in that . Well, it's got a leg up on most other stories in terms of prose construction, and the idea is pretty intriguing. Even reading it straight without any examination into the subtext, it's a nice little horror piece. So it gets some props. It's a rewarding enough to reread to try to figure out what the hell you were going for and make a large ass post trying to discover its meaning. I'd say it's pretty solid all things considered, but there is a criminal lack of signposting to signal the author's intentions here. So it sort of comes across as a monument to nothing, when in fact there is something glittering underneath, just outside the definite grasp of the reader.
A ghost sucks life, love and energy out of a couple? Or is orange a metaphor for ennui? Boringness? Routine that creeps in, settles then invades one’s life, and winds up killing the most passionate of romances? Or indifference maybe. Even god is swallowed up in indifference and disdain.
In any case, I concur this is more than aptly written. I lapped the prose up. If you tried to write in Horizon's semblance, well done.
Just a thing: don't think Vitamin C protects you against the cold or the flu. It's a urban legend. It improves your general state and certainly plays a major role in the immune system, but not that big.
>>Fenton
You mean foot massage, right? :P
In any case, I concur this is more than aptly written. I lapped the prose up. If you tried to write in Horizon's semblance, well done.
Just a thing: don't think Vitamin C protects you against the cold or the flu. It's a urban legend. It improves your general state and certainly plays a major role in the immune system, but not that big.
>>Fenton
First, there is undoubtedly a sexual connotation with foot licking.
You mean foot massage, right? :P
>>Not_A_Hat
I'll try to answer to your points, even if >>Cassius has already covered some. But before, remember (you and any reader who would come accross our talk) that my interpretation isn't the only one possible. Disagreeing with me is absolutely fine, it's even better if you can try to prove me wrong, because I love to challenge my ideas, my thoughts and my opinions.
I must confess that I forgot this part and should have reread the story more carefully. However, that doesn't really invalid my point. If the toenails are already orange, it just means that the infidelity was already there before the poltergeist comes. His arrival reveals what has been hidden (feet are inside shoes most of the day), it's his look that brings the truth under the spotlight.
Since you raised two points, I'll divide the next section in two.
Aside from what I've already said, I can't really add anything. It's one of the weakest point in my demonstration. I don't really know what to do with it. Maybe it's a foreshadowing of what's gonna happen to the couple. Because their relationship will die, the story starts with the death of someone/something.
Indeed, I have never see salt connected to sexuality either. But what the salt reveals about their realtionship is that the suspicion has infected even the simplest life actions. What's more trite that passing the salt? With this action, the story emphasizes the fact that the corruption is everywhere.
Moreover, it's a turning point in the story because the man doesn't ask his wife to pass the salt.
He's asking the poltergeist. Moreover, this happens after a long time.
It's the first time the couple really acknowledges the poltergeist's presence and try to 'confront' him. Notice the three words 'exhaustion', 'compassion' and 'insanity'.
With this, the husband directly address the topic of infidelity. They didn't speak of it before but now that he has infected so much space, they can't deny its presence, the husband confronts his wife. And thus, the salt spews orange geysers, covering the wall with salt/orange. The truth of infidelity is now revealed, no more hidding.
About the ending,
I understand that the ending can seem disconnected to infidelity but in a way, it's one of its major point.
I don't know what you think about infidelity in a couple but for me, from the moment one of the them has cheated, it's almost impossible for the couple to live their life like thay used to. Every look, every gesture, every little lateness will be perceived by the other with the prism of infidelity. Did he/she come back later than usual because he was with his/her lover? Did he/she buy me this present to ease his/her guilt? The situation can only get worse.
That being said, it doesn't prevent couples from trying to save their relationship but the story shows us that it's futile. Moreover, their attempts look silly, with barely any connection with one another. That's because the couple would try anything to save their relationship, even if it's stupid and rely on popular beliefs.
By the way, >>Monokeras has raised a good points.
The couple relies on silly things to protect them from imaginary threats and when comes a real one, they just do the same things. Try to replace the list with going to a couple therapist, taking a long vacation, trying partner swapping or new sexual positions etc...
None of these things can fix the problem in most of the case.
Once you've cheated, you've lost the other's trust. Good luck to get it back.
For that, >>Cassius has almost already said what I was thinking. The poltergeist is some kind of vampire, draining love from the couple. If they get smaller, it's because their love dries out, to the point that it disappears.
I think that covers pretty much everything I wanted to say for now.
As for you >>Cassius, I can only say that I agree with everything you said and the things I had to add are already in my replies to >>Not_A_Hat, so sorry that I didn't do the same thing.
And as a conclusion,
Like I said, it's absolutely fine. It's better if you can keep on disagreeing (plz do that :p) because what I say isn't the truth. It's my interpretation of the story and it needs to be challenged by others in order to have different POVs and perspectives on the matter.
I'll try to answer to your points, even if >>Cassius has already covered some. But before, remember (you and any reader who would come accross our talk) that my interpretation isn't the only one possible. Disagreeing with me is absolutely fine, it's even better if you can try to prove me wrong, because I love to challenge my ideas, my thoughts and my opinions.
the woman's toenails are orange before the poltergeist licks her foot. They just look gray until they start leaving the bedside lamp on.
I must confess that I forgot this part and should have reread the story more carefully. However, that doesn't really invalid my point. If the toenails are already orange, it just means that the infidelity was already there before the poltergeist comes. His arrival reveals what has been hidden (feet are inside shoes most of the day), it's his look that brings the truth under the spotlight.
it doesn't really tie into certain parts of the story very well.
Since you raised two points, I'll divide the next section in two.
The funeral at the beginning
Aside from what I've already said, I can't really add anything. It's one of the weakest point in my demonstration. I don't really know what to do with it. Maybe it's a foreshadowing of what's gonna happen to the couple. Because their relationship will die, the story starts with the death of someone/something.
or the orange salt. Salt isn't a symbol for anything sexual that I've heard of.
Indeed, I have never see salt connected to sexuality either. But what the salt reveals about their realtionship is that the suspicion has infected even the simplest life actions. What's more trite that passing the salt? With this action, the story emphasizes the fact that the corruption is everywhere.
Moreover, it's a turning point in the story because the man doesn't ask his wife to pass the salt.
he is not asking his orange-footed, orange-lipped wife.
He's asking the poltergeist. Moreover, this happens after a long time.
You sit at the dinner table for months, years, maybe longer. The couple ignores you until one night the husband asks (was it exhaustion? compassion? insanity?) for someone to pass the salt
It's the first time the couple really acknowledges the poltergeist's presence and try to 'confront' him. Notice the three words 'exhaustion', 'compassion' and 'insanity'.
You grab the salt shaker. It flies through the air, twirls like a ballerina, geysers orange salt across the walls.
With this, the husband directly address the topic of infidelity. They didn't speak of it before but now that he has infected so much space, they can't deny its presence, the husband confronts his wife. And thus, the salt spews orange geysers, covering the wall with salt/orange. The truth of infidelity is now revealed, no more hidding.
About the ending,
The ending especially makes very little sense to me in relation to infidelity. These people are apparently, at this point, working together to defeat the poltergeist, which they treat more like a physical/spiritual ailment than a relationship one:
[...]
Multivitamins for infidelity?
I understand that the ending can seem disconnected to infidelity but in a way, it's one of its major point.
I don't know what you think about infidelity in a couple but for me, from the moment one of the them has cheated, it's almost impossible for the couple to live their life like thay used to. Every look, every gesture, every little lateness will be perceived by the other with the prism of infidelity. Did he/she come back later than usual because he was with his/her lover? Did he/she buy me this present to ease his/her guilt? The situation can only get worse.
That being said, it doesn't prevent couples from trying to save their relationship but the story shows us that it's futile. Moreover, their attempts look silly, with barely any connection with one another. That's because the couple would try anything to save their relationship, even if it's stupid and rely on popular beliefs.
By the way, >>Monokeras has raised a good points.
Just a thing: don't think Vitamin C protects you against the cold or the flu. It's a urban legend.
The couple relies on silly things to protect them from imaginary threats and when comes a real one, they just do the same things. Try to replace the list with going to a couple therapist, taking a long vacation, trying partner swapping or new sexual positions etc...
None of these things can fix the problem in most of the case.
Once you've cheated, you've lost the other's trust. Good luck to get it back.
And despite that, it still replaces them:They get smaller and smaller and then they are gone.
And that makes no sense to me, as far as infidelity goes.
For that, >>Cassius has almost already said what I was thinking. The poltergeist is some kind of vampire, draining love from the couple. If they get smaller, it's because their love dries out, to the point that it disappears.
I think that covers pretty much everything I wanted to say for now.
As for you >>Cassius, I can only say that I agree with everything you said and the things I had to add are already in my replies to >>Not_A_Hat, so sorry that I didn't do the same thing.
And as a conclusion,
I don't think I can agree with your interpretation.
Like I said, it's absolutely fine. It's better if you can keep on disagreeing (plz do that :p) because what I say isn't the truth. It's my interpretation of the story and it needs to be challenged by others in order to have different POVs and perspectives on the matter.
>>Fenton
I think the orange is pretty much a metaphor for routine or groove. They try everything to break it (comprising changing partner), but it creeps back, until it had invaded every nook of their personal space, and they've become old. Don't old people relish in routine, bland lives? You sit in the same chair every night. Your chair is orange.
I think the orange is pretty much a metaphor for routine or groove. They try everything to break it (comprising changing partner), but it creeps back, until it had invaded every nook of their personal space, and they've become old. Don't old people relish in routine, bland lives? You sit in the same chair every night. Your chair is orange.
>>Cold in Gardez
Seconded. I'm really sad for you HBAO. This really deserved to final.
Now I am eagerly waiting for your retrospective!
Seconded. I'm really sad for you HBAO. This really deserved to final.
Now I am eagerly waiting for your retrospective!
