Hey! It looks like you're new here. You might want to check out the introduction.
Show rules for this event
Fashion Inspiration
Seventeen messages and two voicemails all in the span of ten minutes. I can't even get a decent shower! Still dripping wet, Sunset Shimmer sat on the bed and started going through the texts.
“Not again, Rarity…” Sunset groaned in desperation.
She had been spamming her quite a lot lately, always following the same pattern: greeting, concern, doubt, worry, panic, desperation, gloom, doom, dark humour, reminiscing, hope, joy, light humour, smiley face, hugs and hearts emoticons, request for help, and finally a thank you, all without a single clue as to the topic of conversation.
Sunset was in the middle of forming a theory, when a call brought the phone to life. The girl instinctively grabbed the phone with both hands, then—once her pulse returned to normal—accepted the call.
"Darling, where were you?" Rarity screamed into her ear. "You had me worried sick! I've been phoning you like crazy!"
"Wow." Sunset relaxed onto the bed. "I didn't know you missed me that much—"
"The store will be opening in less than thirty minutes and you're still not here!" Rarity went on, completely ignoring Sunset's attempt to speak. "What on earth are you doing?"
I should've known. Sunset frowned, then pulled herself back into sitting position. "I'm sitting on my bed, butt naked, dripping all over the place, because someone interrupted my shower!”
"Oooh, wonderful!" Rarity sounded alarmingly cheerful. "Take a few selfies for me, pretty please? I could really use those for my avant-garde collage project this semester."
"Rarityyy!" Sunset groaned. Nevertheless, she did feel her face warm up slightly.
"Fiiine, we can discuss that later. What's important now, darling, is that you get dressed and zoom here in the next twenty three minutes. Toodles." Rarity ended the call.
"Aargh!" Sunset threw away, then flopped on the bed.
So much for a calm relaxing day. She grabbed the edge of the blanket and pulled it over her head. The thought of snoozing off was so tempting, yet knowing Rarity there would be hell to pay if she dared.
"Blargh!" Sunset pushed the blanket away and went to get dressed. Might as well get this over with.
Traffic was nonexistent all the way to the mall, possibly the only advantage of driving on a Sunday morning. Parking her motorcycle, Sunset checked the time. Four minutes to nine. Yikes! She grabbed her helmet and ran into the mall.
Rarity'll be pissed! She rushed up the stairs straight for Chez Maud—Rarity's preferred shop for fashion inspiration.
Why am I running? Sunset wondered as she sprinted across the third floor. I’m supposed to be mad! She spams my phone, gets me to come here for no reason, and— Shit! a cold chill passes down the girl's spine. For one thing, there was no sign of a Rarity; for another, the shop was wide open. Damn it! Why is everyone up so crazy early on a Sunday?!
"Rarity?" The girl said meekly as she entered. "I..."
"Hello, Sunset." A slow hiss comes from behind. Before Sunset could blink, she was pulled into a changing booth. "Please try to make up for lost time, darling." A frowning Rarity shoved a stack of clothes into her arms, then turned left with an indignant hmph. "And don't you dare any tricks! No hiding your jeans under the dress this time!"
Dress?! Sunset turned pale as she looked down at the clothes she was holding. You gotta be kidding me! Her left eye twitched.
"And do hurry up, darling," Rarity urged from outside. "The Princess Costume sale ends at eleven and I want to be sure you're tried every last item."
"Every last..." Sunset felt dizzy. Her entire Sunday morning wasted on trying out princess costumes? No way in Tartarus she was going through that! There were things in this world that Friendship couldn't make her do.
"Rarity," Sunset threw the clothes on the floor. I’ve had just about enough! "What exactly possessed you to call me to try princess outfits?!"
"Pfft, that's obvious, darling." Rarity didn't sound one but bothered by Sunset's tone change. "If I'm to design a princess collection, I need to get proper references. And while the costumes provided here are top notch, they don't come with a princess inside."
"Well, I—" Huh? Sunset belt a lump in her throat. Had she heard correctly? Had Rarity called her what she think she had? Sometimes I really hate your subtlety, Rares! "I'll be ready in a bit." She picked up the dress from the floor.
“Not again, Rarity…” Sunset groaned in desperation.
She had been spamming her quite a lot lately, always following the same pattern: greeting, concern, doubt, worry, panic, desperation, gloom, doom, dark humour, reminiscing, hope, joy, light humour, smiley face, hugs and hearts emoticons, request for help, and finally a thank you, all without a single clue as to the topic of conversation.
Sunset was in the middle of forming a theory, when a call brought the phone to life. The girl instinctively grabbed the phone with both hands, then—once her pulse returned to normal—accepted the call.
"Darling, where were you?" Rarity screamed into her ear. "You had me worried sick! I've been phoning you like crazy!"
"Wow." Sunset relaxed onto the bed. "I didn't know you missed me that much—"
"The store will be opening in less than thirty minutes and you're still not here!" Rarity went on, completely ignoring Sunset's attempt to speak. "What on earth are you doing?"
I should've known. Sunset frowned, then pulled herself back into sitting position. "I'm sitting on my bed, butt naked, dripping all over the place, because someone interrupted my shower!”
"Oooh, wonderful!" Rarity sounded alarmingly cheerful. "Take a few selfies for me, pretty please? I could really use those for my avant-garde collage project this semester."
"Rarityyy!" Sunset groaned. Nevertheless, she did feel her face warm up slightly.
"Fiiine, we can discuss that later. What's important now, darling, is that you get dressed and zoom here in the next twenty three minutes. Toodles." Rarity ended the call.
"Aargh!" Sunset threw away, then flopped on the bed.
So much for a calm relaxing day. She grabbed the edge of the blanket and pulled it over her head. The thought of snoozing off was so tempting, yet knowing Rarity there would be hell to pay if she dared.
"Blargh!" Sunset pushed the blanket away and went to get dressed. Might as well get this over with.
Traffic was nonexistent all the way to the mall, possibly the only advantage of driving on a Sunday morning. Parking her motorcycle, Sunset checked the time. Four minutes to nine. Yikes! She grabbed her helmet and ran into the mall.
Rarity'll be pissed! She rushed up the stairs straight for Chez Maud—Rarity's preferred shop for fashion inspiration.
Why am I running? Sunset wondered as she sprinted across the third floor. I’m supposed to be mad! She spams my phone, gets me to come here for no reason, and— Shit! a cold chill passes down the girl's spine. For one thing, there was no sign of a Rarity; for another, the shop was wide open. Damn it! Why is everyone up so crazy early on a Sunday?!
"Rarity?" The girl said meekly as she entered. "I..."
"Hello, Sunset." A slow hiss comes from behind. Before Sunset could blink, she was pulled into a changing booth. "Please try to make up for lost time, darling." A frowning Rarity shoved a stack of clothes into her arms, then turned left with an indignant hmph. "And don't you dare any tricks! No hiding your jeans under the dress this time!"
Dress?! Sunset turned pale as she looked down at the clothes she was holding. You gotta be kidding me! Her left eye twitched.
"And do hurry up, darling," Rarity urged from outside. "The Princess Costume sale ends at eleven and I want to be sure you're tried every last item."
"Every last..." Sunset felt dizzy. Her entire Sunday morning wasted on trying out princess costumes? No way in Tartarus she was going through that! There were things in this world that Friendship couldn't make her do.
"Rarity," Sunset threw the clothes on the floor. I’ve had just about enough! "What exactly possessed you to call me to try princess outfits?!"
"Pfft, that's obvious, darling." Rarity didn't sound one but bothered by Sunset's tone change. "If I'm to design a princess collection, I need to get proper references. And while the costumes provided here are top notch, they don't come with a princess inside."
"Well, I—" Huh? Sunset belt a lump in her throat. Had she heard correctly? Had Rarity called her what she think she had? Sometimes I really hate your subtlety, Rares! "I'll be ready in a bit." She picked up the dress from the floor.
I am left with one big question : Is the ending meant to imply Sunset is now an alicorn/royalty?
Beyond that, Rarity going absolutely apoplectic over clothing is, well, totally Rarity. At the same time, the stakes seem really really high for, well, simply just trying on clothes to see which to buy. I believe this wishes to go in an absurdist comedy direction - I feel the author could improve by giving the story a bit more of a wrench that way. Right now it does feel like it's half-wanting to be serious, half-wanting to be comedy, and so caught between each.
Beyond that, Rarity going absolutely apoplectic over clothing is, well, totally Rarity. At the same time, the stakes seem really really high for, well, simply just trying on clothes to see which to buy. I believe this wishes to go in an absurdist comedy direction - I feel the author could improve by giving the story a bit more of a wrench that way. Right now it does feel like it's half-wanting to be serious, half-wanting to be comedy, and so caught between each.
Sometimes I really hate your subtlety, Rares!
Sometimes I really hate your subtlety, author!
I suspect this is a misaimed attempt at romance, but if it is, it's so misaimed that I can't say for certain.
More than anything, it sounds like Rarity is abusing her friendship because Sunset is the only
There are several hints that this is intended to be shipping, but I think it's more in the mind of the author than anywhere else. Neither a crude "send me nudes" nor flattery to get somepony to do what you want come off as romantic interest.
But if it isn't shipping, then I don't know what the vignette is supposed to leave me with. Is it a sadfic because Sunset being without friends for so long has turned her into a walking doormat? That I can understand (and I'm starting to suspect that was your intent all along), but you need to hit the message harder.
I’m with Trick: Whatever you were going for with this one, it came off feeling creepy on multiple levels. I’d expect that kind of SMS bombardment from Pinkie, not Rarity, and the detainment at Chez Maud (which itself is bit of a confusing name, given the one Maud we know of in this series) feels like… well, detainment. Asking for nude pictures only compounds the disturbing undertones.
You may need to rebuild this one from the ground up.
You may need to rebuild this one from the ground up.
I think that if it had started subtly then built to a crazy, "You must wear this princess dress," crescendo it could have worked. As it stands it just feels kind of weird. I just don't really believe scenario and if someone I worked with or for wanted nudes of me I'd probably either quit my job or get them fired.
Fashion Inspiration — A — First impression: Nice mental images for the predominantly male readership (snerk) (+) It flows well, it has the characters on the dot and rolls along with Sunset’s emotions really well, getting right into her head (-) A little flat on the ending, with some “what?” on my part.