The more abstract poetry becomes, the more it goes over my head. I'm not good at figuring out deeply obscured meanings, so I'm probably not the audience for this. It sounds good, but I don't know what it means. My best guess is that someone is trying out gymnastics equipment and finding out they're not as good as they wish they were (or used to be), then making a metaphorical comparison to the wood and trees the equipment was made from. But then I don't see what that comparison means. No formal structure to analyze, so nothing to say there. It sounds nice, but I can't figure it out.

Rhymes are all clean, but the rhythm is forced in places, like where you had to italicize "the" to make it be stressed, and it's also odd to see "inspire" as 3 syllables.

As to meaning, I like the equating of the random path a photon follows when escaping the sun to the way writing ideas escape the brain. Simple but well-stated.

Congrats to Groaning, as always (!).

>>Pascoite
Ah, some unanticipated ambiguity. The 'beam' is the rafter with lights around it. It's about the physical experience of doing yoga on the floor, looking up at the ceiling. I was going for a simple subject with this, but looks like I need a more practice.

Thanks for your critique.