Hey! It looks like you're new here. You might want to check out the introduction.

Creeping Dread · Poetry Minific ·
Organised by Anon Y Mous
Word limit 15–1000
Show rules for this event
Blow Out of Proportion
The results are in
For my wellness tests
They look quite grim
Dress in my best

They show no issues
No excuses to cancel
Can't use my tissues
Must endure this hassle

More healthy than healthy
Horrible to my fate
Even though not wealthy
This stupid freaky date

Worried that I'll be
Judge as a hick
Weak in the knees
Wish I was sick
« Prev   4   Next »
#1 ·
·
I think I mostly "pick up what is being put down" by this poem, which rings with me as the intent of its design. It is a counterpart to the submission on Augustine, and a cultural comment, that we hope for an external diagnosis for our feeling of anxiety, to forbear a more treacherous self-diagnosis.

But poetry can be more than just "laying something down". It might, in fact, be more 'accurate' than anything we can say! For example, is there some physical characteristic, like "weak in the knees", which you would associate with being "judged as a hick"? That is a life story, for someone.
#2 ·
·
So I'm guessing this is about a hypochondriac? That's what it sounds like to me. This is probably Griseus or AJ, since they go for looser rhymes that can be okay if spoken but get rather exposed when written. A few word usage issues, like "judge" instead of "judged."

I could understand the poem to a point, but by the end it lost me. Why would good health brand someone as a hick? I don't get what the "freaky date" is, and both ways I could take "tissues" are kind of strange. Is it that he wishes he had a reason to cry into a tissue over a bad health report, or that he's been called unsuitable as a transplant donor? I'll go with the former, since that fits the hypochondriac theme, but I'm still mystified as to what would make people think he was a hick.
#3 ·
·
So much in life
One can overlink.
Deal with the strife,
It's better than you think.