>>Posh

I'm not too sure what you're referring to here. Are you talking about Apple Bloom's initial actions upon waking, or about her remarks to Applejack, or about the moment where she fully shakes off the dream?

I was scratching my head because Applebloom's immediate response "The bed's too deep; I almost fell right in." seemed at odds with what happened. I mean, yeah she was kind of stuck in the bed, but that felt kind of minor compared to creepy face creatures. And to be pedantic, she was pushed more then fell.

So if Applebloom remembered what happened, it seems like an odd thing to say, but if she forgot it, why would she be staring at where the creatures were?

Congrats to our newest medalists, and apologies for any mental trauma induced by butting heads against this monolith, but it seems that folks at least got some gratification as it was picked apart.

In particular, my sincere gratitude to >>Pascoite, >>Not_A_Hat, >>Meridian_Prime, >>Bachiavellian, >>Baal Bunny, >>Rao, >>Posh, >>Miller Minus, >>WritingSpirit, and >>Comma Typer for leaving their thoughts, even the dittos.

I knew I was being obscure, but being on the inside, I didn't fully appreciate the degree of difficulty. This is a prime example of the value of reader feedback in calibration.

FWIW, >>Bachiavellian pretty much nailed it with his theory. The only caveat is that I hadn't quite envisioned eons, but it's entirely possible.

If anyone was curious about the critter names, it was basically <diet> <size><composition>.

I appreciate the suggestions; there are some interesting pathways there, and if at some point i to develop it, try to incorporate them, as well as I have some ideas to expand on the core concept as well.

Still, I'd feel remiss about not putting out a chapter of JPT first.

Impossible to take seriously, but amusing.

The standout piece was the humor, of course, with the other elements doing serviceable jobs, but not really noteworthy one way or the other.

I noticed a bit of show/tell redundancy; "O-kay," Twilight said. Their attempts at reassurance did nothing for her fears. to me, the "O-kay" removes the need for the second half.

It definitely plays to a particular sense of humor. The trick for me was managing the cognitive dissonance of laughing at Twilight despite realizing that she's right and the premise really doesn't make sense at all.

The twist at the end into our more traditional absurdity (without the dissonance) worked for me in juicing just a bit extra humor into it, as did the Luna bit.

So good job, I laughed.

The bookends were okay, and I found the concept somewhat amusing.

I took a halfhearted stab at interpreting the text; some bits almost make sense, but if it was intended to have an overall meaning, it was too obscure for me to pick up on. Occam's razor indicates that it's probably AI generated.

I haven't actually read any Anon-A-Miss fanfics, but the ending was still kind of funny. So while I can't rate it highly, it amused me more than it annoyed me.

Transponer is a great way to make your own special life in your own home in the world of the same time that you can enjoy your life with a beautiful and unique experience.

The camera faces backwards from a wide range of different angles to the station and the atmosphere wraps the perfect fit for your home. You can get a comfortable bed and a half solid kitchen table for your own reference. I've also included a few of the pictures that I think you might like to see where you can find a good one for your wedding party.

Reanimation sequence in progress.

Having experienced a degree of sleep paralysis when waking up from dreams, if describing this was the intent, it rang true. Definitely material to build a nightmare from (if this was indeed the pedestrian sort). Creepy imagery, but I had ran across the mention of sleep paralysis in another comment, which somewhat muted the suspense. Even so, I loved lines like "Screamed in silence until her lungs burned."

The transition when she wakes mixes things up, but was also difficult to follow; she instantly replied to deny it without giving any indication of her thought processes, so I was left to wonder: Is it some compulsion? Insta-forgetting? Lying?

I'm getting mixed signals, and just don't know what to conclude.

Overall, I found it atmospheric and descriptive, and does a good job cultivating a mood, but then when it came to translating that mood into an emotional impact, it caught me wrong-footed, and I came to the end not sure what it really meant, if anything.

I can't help but find it ironic that this story stemmed from "Smoke and Mirrors", rather than either of the technology-related prompt images.

It was difficult to get into, and though I like to think I would've figured it out eventually, it's hard to avoid spoilers this late in the round and I'll admit that they helped.

The terminology is a double edged sword. It's atmospheric and doesn't seem random, but the learning curve is just about vertical. For example, all the plants and animals are described by strange names, but the reader is left to puzzle it out what's what.

Along with hurting comprehension, it hurt pacing. Compare with "Emotional Support Being"; both are 750 words, but while that one was described as 'short', this one very much wasn't.

Another thing I noticed that might be worth considering is the paragraph structure; many of the paragraphs are nearly the same length, so the pacing does not vary much. And granted, wordcount restrictions, but with such dense information, it seems like it might benefit from cutting some pieces and spreading the information out over others to spare the reader a bit.

In the end, I don't know how much of the intent I ultimately got. I like >>Bachiavellian's theory, but regardless it seems like there are some interesting pieces there, and it's another entrant in the 'respect the effort' category.

'Unfolds' is a weird mental image to start on without context. The drooping later is much easier to follow

After that initial misstep, though, the prose and imagery were strong. One thing that threw me, though - six statues? I'm not sure who the sixth would be. I wondered a little about the Celestia/Luna statues as well, but that was addressed.

I'm not sure why, but right from the get go I did envision the unnamed princess as Twilight, so the reveal did not have as much impact as it might have.

The emotions felt authentic and the dialog flowed smoothly, so while it didn't tread the newest of ground, plot-wise it was still pleasant. There was a shade or two of difference to the character voicing, though. While this partly an attitude thing from experience, the British-isms that others have mentioned are probably also a factor.

My caveats didn't keep me from enjoying it, though, and I found it to be a nice little character piece overall.

>>Bachiavellian
Okay, with that context the missing bits now make sense. Still not particularly pony, but worth a groan.

Vivid colors, and nice sense of motion; the transition of reflected sky to water is handled nicely as well.

One thing that wasn't always that clear to me, though, was just how much of the fish are in the water. For example the bottom left and right fish aren't really water-shaded, but are clearly below the lillypads. By contrast, the fish just to the bottom right of Fluttershy is much more obviously underwater.

Also, to really be contrarian, I'm tempted to advocate for clouds in the water and lillypads in the sky, but that's probably just being silly.

Clever and well executed. It took me a bit to grok just what I was seeing, but it was one of those lightbulb moments when it did.

Serviceable composition and nice colors; although it doesn't wind up with the highest beauty quotient, it's still interesting and the mechanism in particular is visually intriguing.

No idea what medium it's in. I'd believe either the model theory, or maybe CG, also. Either way, high props in both creativity and effort.

Definitely getting a 'trapped in the matrix' type vibe out of this one. Inventive use of the prompt, in conjunction with the display technology. It hadn't occurred to me until the other comments, but I'd grant more points if I could be sure that the artist drew the Pinkie, as well as managing the display.

Still, it's a provocative combination of image and media to enhance the impact.

Aside from commented-on educational factor, this is a solid piece.

Colors are accurate/provocative, the shapes get the job done, and the posing is clever; dynamic, and the non-visible characters impact Twilight just enough to make the viewer think something is going on, and then it turns out that there is.

Top tier; the artwork would be serviceable enough on its own, and the clever prompt-related use of site features takes it to the next level.

Not really your fault, but the thumbnail throws off my sense of composition/shape; in particular the shadow of the closed eye is prominent enough that it almost makes it looks like it's a fully side on shot. I don't know the best way to address it, but it was hard for me to recover when looking at the actual picture.

I did just have the realization that her pupil actually looks lighter than the adjacent shadow, which feels odd, and de-emphasizes the open eye.

It could be from a beam of light, but I did get the sense that the view was out of squinted/open/closing eyelids, an impression which never really went away.

The shapes looked fine, and the colors were naturally muted; no issues there. I'd think it mainly just needs some playing around with the shading to take it to the next level.

Cute and cheerful, but if the artist intended a story behind it, I'm not sure what it is. (though obviously folks were able to apply ones to it)

The drawing skills were solid; while not the most refined in the field, the subjects were all identifiable, and nothing looked out of place. And while not the sort of composition that inherently benefits from being a sketch, but gets the point across, and doesn't really suffer from it, either.

Nice entry, overall.

My first go at this I highlighted the whole thing and tried reading straight through. That did not work so well. It's also worth noting that I am not particularly great at poems, either writing or reading.


The Luna poem was a little hard to follow at times, also referencing guards by name broke my rhythm, as I wasn't familiar with them. 'honored guards' might have been a smoother way to refer to them.

The first white poem was easier to follow, but as I went along, it started to feel like it overly relied upon the 'ise' rhyming scheme.

The purple and last white poem both suffer from it not being clear exactly what (presumably) Twilight is trying to find, but provide a nice point/counterpoint of her doing it in day, than night.

Hard to follow the overall arc of things, and I'm not really all that well equipped to comment on it, but it was intriguing, and I respect the effort.

I had some reservations on Celestia's voicing; 'peculiar Pinkie' is nicely alliterative, but not the type of thing I recall hearing from her elsewhere. Similarly, I'm not so sure about the 'magical nothing space', although maybe that's a thing in an episode I'm not caught up on.

There are some places where the wording could be tightened, for example "Bound by seals. Not one seal, but seven seals." could be just "not one, but seven". The seven seals thing wasn't bad, though.

Twilight's voicing seemed more solid for me; I can't recall anything that particularly jumped out at me.

The meta twist isn't bad, but it's a subject that has been visited enough that it has a hard time keeping up the story as the primary plot point. There's the reveal and then just kind of ends. Granted, it's a minific, and there's not all that room for much more, but it's something that would strengthen it.

Solid overall structure, what with the number of reasons counting up.

The individual characterization felt solid, with nice little asides and moments that both built atmosphere and showcased personalities, such as the unrealistic expectations of Ursa's eating. Also, Ursa. A dog named bear; not at all unrealistic as far as pet names, but amusing.

The relationship was pleasant, though it would have benefited from having more word count to develop over.

Also ' this morning ... had' tense feels wonky, especially as the narrative progresses past the original 'this' morning point. A tense change or consider rephrasing to something like 'Tempest woke up with two reasons to live'

Some places where you the story both showed and told; for example "the though was a fun on,e and it made her heart skip" - granted fun is not the same as attraction, but it still might have been better with just the heart skip.

I wasn't sure how to apply the emphasis from the italics in the last line

First of all, take my feedback with a large grain of salt, as I'm behind in my episodes and can't speak with any certainty on the student 6.

So speaking from general impressions, the first scene did a good job of mixing action and dialog, and the individual characterization felt internally consistent. A character asking a dragon how they know so much about dragons, though... Um. That could be legit characterization, and he is called on it, but it's egregious enough that it raised an eyebrow. As well, the 'X has been a changeling all along' has been done enough that it feels a bit worn, especially with reformed changelings now in the mix. Having it later seem to turn out to be true felt like a bit of a stretch.

Overall I felt that the dialog and interactions flowed nicely enough, and the story beats came together as a serviceable arc, but due to the particular elements used, I had some trouble with suspension of disbelief.

On my first read I had difficulty following the characters at times, particularly in the beginning, where I wasn't sure who was speaking.

I can't say I'm a fan of the smoking either, but fics gotta fic, and it could be for the 'smoke' part of the 'smoke and mirrors'

There's some nicely understated drama here. It takes some time to come into focus, and benefits from the second read.

I appreciated some of the subtle shadings of emotion that the phrasing achieved, such as 'allowed to grow apart' and 'come to love them less'

Descriptions / body language were on the sparse side, and I'm not the biggest fan of the use of alignment to denote speaker. It did work, however, and there's the word limit to keep in mind.

And so I learn that the site has a dark mode...

Enjoyable premise; it had a nice balance between interesting anecdotes that the characters were relating, and those adding up to the larger picture. It felt like I came to the realization at about the same time as the characters, which was nice. As to the ending, I may be too indirect in my own stories, but I can't help but wonder if the ending would have landed better if they hadn't realized what Discord was up to.

That first big paragraph made the intro feel a little clunky when I first read it, though it wasn't so bad afterwards. The subtle details and turns of phrase are excellent; there are some insightful bits of prose, like talking about the eyes.

Though I agree with >>horizon for the most part, I have a different take on Twilight's upset. 'Princess duties' seemed like a clear excuse. Discounting that, it most feels like pure immortal angst. Though that would beg the question that if Rarity went to Ponyville, why couldn't Twilight also, which is a level of detail that the fic is cagey about.

I enjoyed the style and tone of the piece overall, and it got some decent laughs.

It reminded me of the "Twinkle-Nebula-Frie-Neutron" reunion story, though it doesn't have quite the same punch, to me. Comparing the two, there one of the things that stood out to me is motivation. The reunion shenannigans are grounded in Twilights (related) follibles, so much of the humor is science related, and feels very much up Twilight's alley. This story is more generic 'corrupt politician' which, while amusing, does not ring quite as true. We never really get a reason for Twilight to want this dam, but the few mad-scientist-esque asides were some of the stronger points for me. The reunion was also just a little more over the top, although this story had some really great elements, such as the lethal letters at the beginning.

I hope this extended comparison did not give the wrong impression - I did quite enjoy this story. I got a good laugh about the approach and tone regardless. It just gave me a bit of a sense of familiarity when I did read it, and I tried to explore my thoughts on the matter.

I liked the premise & setting; it was inherently interesting, and sparked engaging interactions between the characters.

I'm having a similar problem to the others, though. If I'm interpreting this correctly, then for history to flow correctly (aka canon) requires the drugging of the M6 (or for them to be dumb, or asleep, or similar as a result of said drugging). I'm not as current on the show as I should be, but I don't recall an instance relating to Chrysalis when the 6 were drugged. So while this makes for an interesting scene, so I can't place it in context with events.

This story is good at establishing an unsettling atmosphere. As the reader, we know what's going on is benign, but it's continually juxtaposed by the reaction of the character. The ending felt similar to me - there's a smile, but no real sense of happiness. Overall, the story felt like it mostly played one note. It was an interesting note, but the whole thing didn't end up very complex overall for me.