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Keep Pretending · FiM Minific ·
Organised by RogerDodger
Word limit 400–750
Show rules for this event
It's a Kind of Magic
They were lying on the bench.

Tempting.

After the recent mishap, Wallflower Blush knew better than to trust a random thing she'd just found lying around in the park, but a pair of plastic pony ears looked rather ordinary. Well, unlike most fake pony ears, this pair also had a horn; however, it didn't glow in the dark and didn't do anything else that'd indicate it was magical.

Wallflower looked around. It was a warm, autumn day and there were a lot of people in the park. None of them looked at her, though. Even though memory stone was long gone, people didn't usually stare at Wallflower and now she could take advantage of that.

She looked around again, grabbed the pony ears and put them on. Nothing strange happened; they didn't try to control her mind, didn't make her grow in size, and didn't infuse her with alien horse magic. For a moment, Wallflower felt a little disappointed. Then she remembered her own experiences with magic, as well as the strange case of Vignette Valencia and her recent meltdown during the livestream, which earned her a couple of new followers and a cozy room in the local nuthouse.

Wallflower shrugged. She'd pretty much given up on SnapGab after it turned out her only followers were some confused bot and her own mom. She wasn't sure whose comments were more pathetic.

Walking down the park alley, she remembered about the pony ears. Her first thought was to take them off, but then she remembered that she was supposed to get more friends. What was a better way to attract someone's attention than wearing some fashionable gadget? A lot of people in her school wore pony ears from time to time. Wallflower thought it was silly, but for some reason, some CHS students really liked putting equestrian motifs everywhere. Wallflower often wondered why they loved horses that much. In fact, she suspected the magic leak that gave her memory stone really messed with everyone's minds.

She looked at the pony ears and a thought appeared in her mind. What if she tried to be like Sunset Shimmer and her friends? She'd clearly noticed them growing actual pony ears whenever something particularly magical happened. Or when they were playing a song. Or on pretty much any occasion, these days. Back in the memory stone era, Wallflower overheard Pinkie Pie complaining loudly and in vivid detail about ponying up in all the worst moments, which freaked guys out. Never before Wallflower was so close to using the memory stone on herself.

She spun in place, feeling the damn ears on her head. "I'm popular," she muttered to herself. "I sprout a pony tail whenever I'm doing something awesome." She closed her eyes. "I freak guys out with my ears. That'd be better than no guys at all."

She spun in place again and bounced off of someone. Startled, she opened her eyes. She blushed, realising that Sunset Shimmer was standing in front of her, looking at her and furrowing her eyebrows. Wallflower reached for the pocket where she used to keep the memory stone before remembering that it was gone. She blushed, her mind producing a quick solution – a regular rock, applied repeatedly to Sunset's head would make her lose memories of this event as quickly as if it was still her old stone.

Sunset smiled sheepishly. "I didn't mean to read your thoughts, but, umm... you okay there?"

Wallflower immediately stopped thinking about bashing Sunset's skull open. "Umm... I'm fine. Like, totally fine."

"I see..." Sunset looked at the pony ears on Wallflower's head. "You found that model with a horn? For some reason they don't make them anymore."

"Yes," Wallflower replied. "I think. I found them and put them on and they're not magical at all and I was just thinking how, umm..."

Sunset nodded slowly. "How would it be to be a pony?"

For a moment Wallflower considered telling her the truth. Even though it was quite a while since the memory stone incident and she'd found some friends since then, those old feelings kept resurfacing from time to time. Like today.

"Sure, let's go with that," Wallflower said.

Sunset smiled. "I know that feeling."

Wallflower raised her eyebrows. The pony ears suddenly felt very heavy on her head. "I'm not sure..." she whispered.


Pics
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#1 ·
· · >>Skywriter
I'm not up on the most recent EQG content, so I'm really lost on a few points here.

A lot of points, actually. I remember who Wallflower was, and the memory stone, but... Sunset can read minds now? I'm just not sure what's going on.
#2 ·
· · >>Hap
>>Hap
As of "Legend of Everfree" all the girls have superpowers coming from the crystal fragment pendants that they wear. Sunset can hear the thoughts of anyone she touches and briefly read their memories as well.
#3 ·
·
>>Skywriter
Thanks. I wasn't sure if that was part of the story, or background info I should have known from the franchise.
#4 ·
·
Genre: Random Encounter

Thoughts: I like this as a moment of getting inside Wallflower's head as she tries to adapt to life after losing the Memory Stone. We get to see what she thinks of the M7, and how she reacts to something unexpected showing up in her day.

I feel like this is kinda low on plot, though. Wallflower's discovery and subsequent meeting with Sunset don't seem to drive change in themselves or their world. It also ends a bit abruptly, which emphasizes the overall feeling of incompleteness.

Still, I like seeing more Wallflower pop up. There are years worth of content exploring every nook and cranny of the early characters; IMO there's huge untapped potential in the newer ones.

Tier: Keep Developing
#5 ·
·
I definitely like what you're going for here, with the low-key conflict that hints at greater emotional stakes.

What I think is really hampering this story is how slow the start is. For a very big chunk of your story (about 400-500 words), there's not all that much going on, except for introducing the premise. While it's great that you introduce the pony ears quickly and effectively from the get-go, what immediately follows is meandering. And while I get that this is part of the low-stakes mood you're trying to set, I couldn't help but feel that the story really needed to go somewhere, especially since we're dealing with a minific. Consequentially, the convo with Sunset feels very bare-bones, because you've only got 150 words left to play with.

I'm pretty certain that there is a way to get this story to comfortably fit in 750 words, but it would probably mean doing a bit of pruning in the first bits. Or doing something more drastic, like nyxing the convo with Sunset altogether. The idea here definitely feels good and well within the scope of a minific, but I think you might need to get there more efficiently.