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Glass Masquerade · Original Short Story ·
Organised by RogerDodger
Word limit 2000–8000
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Blood on a Snowy Field
Fics
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#1 · 1
· · >>Icenrose
Yo hey. This one's pretty much the total opposite of the previous one in the gallery, even though they're from the same story. Nice!

At first it took me a moment to notice that the picture created a face, but once I saw it I understood what the artist was going for -- it's a pretty clever idea! The fic is full of nutty weird imagery, and while this is not taken literally from it, it's in the same spirit.

So the ravens create her eyes and the blood on the snow creates her lips, which I think is exactly how the story defines Sylvia's smile. The trees sorta form the contorn of her face? But this is supposed to both look like a face and be a literal scene in a snowy field, so mostly I'm assuming they're just trees and that's it.

I like the idea a lot, and it does give that weird-ass feeling the story reaches with the strangest descriptions, so I dig it. That said, the crows vary in size and detail a lot, which is a bit distracting? And the composition is nice, but the tree on the right looks significantly worse than the one on the left.

I don't know enough about abstract art to know if that should matter or not, though. Like, I could very well tell you that having the birds be more homogeneous would help make the picture look more polished -- but, would it?

I mean, ultimately what this picture is going for (I think -- I hope?) is less a literal, photorealistic depiction of a particular image, and more to evoke a feeling. Much like the story that inspired it. It's strange and has dark imagery, it's black against white against red, and it depicts a human face that looks disturbing even if it's recognizable, because it doesn't really register as human.

The story's kinda gruesome, and this pic imitates that same gothic/dark/gross feeling pretty well. So, fuck it. I don't think having the birds be more photorealistic and similar to each other in detail and size would've helped the picture that much; if you picture this as drawn in that style it gives a completely different feeling. This pic tries to do one thing and does it pretty well; that's all that matters.
#2 · 1
· · >>Icenrose
I much admire what you tried to achieve here, Artist. Double images and visual puns are a fondness of mine. The bleak portrayal of the murder scene is in keeping with the feel of the source story.

I do think you should treat this as a first draft and work on the proportions of the face, which looks much too wide and has a cartoonish feel to it. Striving for a more natural-looking face will enhance the uncanny feel of the work. I’m ranking this as mid tier.
#3 · 1
·
>>Aragon
Thanks so much for your feedback! The lines in the title and caption jumped out at me as particularly evocative in the story, so I just ran with them. The crows varying in size was me trying to force a bit of perspective - the small blip on the back of the dead guy is supposed to be a crow perched there to help sell that, but I don't think that's in any way clear. The tree on the right looking worse is a product of me messing up following my own line work (if you look really closely, you can see the original line for the rightmost branch) so I can only blame time constraints for not starting over from scratch (that, and waiting until the last minute to actually get cracking on art ^^).

All that said, you nailed what I was going for - photorealism is pretty far beyond what I'm capable of at this point, so I went for a disturbing, uncanny feel. I'm glad you liked the piece!

>>GroaningGreyAgony
Yep, as soon as I started filling in the birds I realized that the tree on the left was too far away to properly frame her face. The birds are a bit too far apart and a bit too... rigid, maybe. I was hoping for more of a suggestion of a face, but when I took a picture with my phone to upload it the phone tried to recognize the face for what it was. /shrug.

All told, I'm still pretty pleased with how this turned out. It's clumsy in its execution, sure, but its still close to the image I had in my head, and I'm still at the point where I'm impressed with accomplishing even that much. ^^

Progress! Onwards and upwards!