Hey! It looks like you're new here. You might want to check out the introduction.
Show rules for this event
Transcribed Memories
Dear Diary,
I met someone new today! She's short and cute and has claws for days and hisses at people if things don't go her way and seems really smart and clever and her name's Catra! Don't you think that's just a wonderful name? It rhymes with my own, too! She recently got appointed Force Captain (that's how we met) and looks like she's already getting the hang of things. There are, of course, a couple of facts she doesn't know: she somehow never got told that she was supposed to attend orientation -- or that an orientation for Force Captains even existed, how odd -- which would have given her all the information she needed. Anything she gets stuck on, though, I help her out with. We've really built a rapport! I don't know a lot about her yet, other than the fact that she doesn't like it if hugs go on too long, and that she'll stop answering entirely if you ask her too many questions, especially ones she considers "too personal"; I'm glad, then, that we'll be seeing a lot more of each other, since Shadow Weaver wants us working together, because that gives me ample time to learn more. Maybe soon we'll even be best friends!
(I really, really want us to be best friends.)
Dear Diary,
Today has officially been the best day of my life.
Better than the day of my first mission, and my first victory against the enemies of the Horde. Better than the day both Lord Hordak and Shadow Weaver chose me to become Force Captain. Better even than the day I tried my very first cupcake and nearly died of bliss, it was so divine. No, today topped all of those days by a mile and a half. Is that statement correct? I'm not sure, but it's a close enough representation of how I feel about the past twenty-four hours. The past perfect, beautiful, incredible, awe-inspiring, victorious twenty-four hours. It's also been a very, very long day, so I'm writing this much later than I usually do; it may be lights out soon, but I'll try to jot down as much as I can before then.
I went to the Princess Prom! And I went with Catra! I was invited to the last Princess Prom, too, my being a princess and all, but I didn't go because a) it might have been considered to be consorting with the enemy, and b) I was ten years younger than I am now and wouldn't have been allowed to leave the premises of the Horde's headquarters back then anyway. My devious best friend, though -- and she is my best friend! -- thought up the perfect plan, and it involved going to the Prom, and dressing up and looking pretty, and having fun, and meeting people, and also at the same time being there because it was a mission for the Horde, approved by Lord Hordak himself, and have I ever mentioned how intelligent Catra is? If I haven't, let me just take a second to say it now: Catra is intelligent. Very, very intelligent. Nobody in the Horde had ever even imagined that the Princess Prom could have been a very useful road to defeating the Rebellion, yet Catra thought of the idea within minutes of hearing of its existence. Catra's often complained about her abilities not being recognized by anyone, and I think I might just be inclined to agree with her: it's not possible for someone to see how incredibly talented Catra is and not make her Force Captain sooner. Perhaps Shadow Weaver had her own reasons for not doing so; I don't want to judge her too harshly without knowing her true thoughts and feelings on the matter, you know? But I do believe that if Catra'd become a captain like me earlier, the Horde would have benefited greatly.
I'm getting off track. Princess Prom! The day went by without a hitch. Catra and I (and Lonnie, and Kyle, and Rogelio, but the people there didn't know that) were pretending to only be there for a fun time (Diary, I wore a dress! And I looked beautiful! And even Catra agreed!) but nobody could possibly have fathomed that our motives behind our actions were rather more... sinister. Sinister, ha. I like that word. I should use it more often. Well, to be fair, Adora did suspect something, so perhaps our sinister motives weren't as hidden as we assumed. Have I ever told you about Adora? She used to be Catra's best friend before she misguidedly left the Horde in order to ally with the princesses; from what I can make out of Catra's grumbling under her breath, she seems to be under the impression that Adora is yet another person like Shadow Weaver who never truly appreciated her worth and her quick mind, but I'm of a different opinion. Just the fact alone that Adora knew Catra well enough to understand that she probably had some bigger plan in mind, when nobody else did, is proof that she sees Catra's genius and doesn't underestimate her in the least! Then again, I may not have all the facts. At least Princess Frosta was quick to put an end t
Dear Diary,
Lights out stopped me from writing more last night, as you might have figured. I'm up early today to make up for that, though, so this time I'll actually give you the short version of the story instead of rambling on, I promise:
1) Princess Prom was fun!
2) We managed to steal Adora's huge, scary-looking but also kind of pretty magic sword!
3) We also captured Princess Glimmer and her fellow rebel Bow! I don't think the Horde has had a victory of this magnitude in the history of my time here!
4) Catra and I are best friends and are inseparable now!!
5) Well at any rate she's my best friend, and I might be hers too although she's never actually said it aloud, but making her say it out loud is next on my list!
6) Not this list, another one.
Time to go now; duty calls. Be back with an update on the whole situation tonight!
Dear Diary,
Have you ever cared about a person, cared about them very much, but known that you aren't as important to them, and might never be?
I suppose you haven't.
Dear Diary,
I'm sorry about last night's entry being so short as well as so sad; I wasn't in the best state then, and couldn't help but ponder some potential worst possible scenarios. But I'm feeling better now, so you needn't worry about me! I met a man today, whose name is Seahawk and seems like a pretty decent guy, even if we are technically enemies on the battlefield considering he's friends with the princesses and a part of the Rebellion while I'm here in the Horde, but we accidentally found ourselves in a sort of truce state -- long story, but I can tell you it involved a corrupted sword, lots of snow, and a couple of deadly centipede monsters -- and in that truce we had a very inspiring talk about shared difficulties, coming out of it much better people than we went in, I'm sure!
The talk was, as you might well have deduced, about unreciprocated emotions, and about the people we care most about not seeing us in the same light. Catra's my best friend, and has been almost since the moment we met, but I'm not hers: perhaps she's still hurting after Adora's abandoning her, and can't imagine having a new best friend so soon, or perhaps she's just too afraid of having a new best friend because they might leave her too, or perhaps it's just me she doesn't want to be best friends with, but that's alright. I'm not giving up on her, regardless of what she feels about me! Even if the feeling is anger and resentment following what happened today.
See, I had a choice before me: save Catra or retrieve the First Ones tech that corrupted Adora's sword. It didn't take very long to make my decision -- people will always be more important; Catra will always be more important -- but Catra was very displeased. She thought the tech was more important, as it might just be the key to a much more successful future for the Horde, and she's probably right, but I couldn't save it. She's pretty silent now, and hasn't been talking to me for a while, and I can tell she's unhappy with me about today's events, and there's nothing I can do to fix that right now, but it's better that she be unhappy and alive than... the alternative, right?
At least she's here.
Dear Diary,
I'm worried about Catra. I'm really, really worried about her. There was something very obviously wrong with her today, so I did the only thing I knew how to do to make things better, which meant wrapping her up in a blanket and singing her a lullaby, and it seemed to work, since she told me what was bothering her: Shadow Weaver escaped the dungeons. She's just been called by Lord Hordak about something, so I can't do any more to comfort her; I hope she's back soon, though. I know Shadow Weaver is significant to her, and this loss probably weighs far more heavily on her than it would on anyone else. She needs a friend by her side right now, and I don't think she'll find one in Lord Hordak's chambers.
Unless, of course, Entrapta's there. But I don't think Catra's been feeling too fond of her lately, and besides, she doesn't know Catra's troubles, so she won't know to console her.
Diary, I can't find Catra.
Dear Diary,
Elaboration on yesterday's entry: Catra's disappeared. She went inside Lord Hordak's rooms after she told me of Shadow Weaver's getaway and then never came out... or at least, didn't come out any time I was watching. I've searched the headquarters from top to bottom and haven't left a single place unexplored, but there is not a single sign of her.
I think Lord Hordak might have done something to her.
Hordak's little robot baby thing (what is it, exactly?) has been following me around, scuttling above my head ever since Catra went missing; I think it knows what she means to me. I don't want to write any more, in case it can read, so I'll stop here for now.
I miss Catra.
Dear Catra,
You will never read this. That's a promise, by the way, because if I find you I'll tell you everything that's written in this letter myself, word for word -- and I will find you. That's another promise. Maybe that leaves the writing of this letter pointless, but I'm writing it more for myself than for you, so there's that, I guess.
You've always said that nobody sees you for who you truly are. Adora left you for the princesses; Shadow Weaver overlooked your skills time and again in favor of Adora's; Lord Hordak, too, didn't appreciate your victories as much as he should have, focusing more on Entrapta's technologically inclined abilities. Here's the thing, though: I see you. I've always seen you, and acknowledged your talents and accomplishments, even if you've never really seen me. I know I'm not the person whose validation you seek, but I also wish you'd value yourself on your own without needing any other person's stamp of approval. You deserve that. You deserve to love yourself, as much as you deserve to have other people love you unconditionally, and I wish, oh how I wish you would understand that! I've been telling myself this for ages, but it doesn't matter if you think me your best friend or not: all I want is for you to know that I think you mine, to know that there's someone out there who cherishes you for who you are.
I'm leaving the Horde. It isn't because I suddenly disagree with their fight, which I don't, but because I need to find you. Even if it takes me a year and a half, I'll travel Etheria from end to end, leaving no stone unturned, no corner unsearched! I won't rest until I have you back by my side, safe from everyone who could possibly desire to hurt you. There's a raid scheduled on one of the Rebellion's smaller soldier outposts tomorrow, and I intend to sneak out during the fray before anyone notices. I can't take anything with me, as someone might think it suspicious, so I'll have to get all my provisions after I leave. That's only a tiny problem in the scheme of things, though: I'd rather face all the problems in the world than have to suffer even a single more moment wondering where you are, how you are.
I'm coming for you, best friend. Wait for me.
Yours always,
Scorpia
I met someone new today! She's short and cute and has claws for days and hisses at people if things don't go her way and seems really smart and clever and her name's Catra! Don't you think that's just a wonderful name? It rhymes with my own, too! She recently got appointed Force Captain (that's how we met) and looks like she's already getting the hang of things. There are, of course, a couple of facts she doesn't know: she somehow never got told that she was supposed to attend orientation -- or that an orientation for Force Captains even existed, how odd -- which would have given her all the information she needed. Anything she gets stuck on, though, I help her out with. We've really built a rapport! I don't know a lot about her yet, other than the fact that she doesn't like it if hugs go on too long, and that she'll stop answering entirely if you ask her too many questions, especially ones she considers "too personal"; I'm glad, then, that we'll be seeing a lot more of each other, since Shadow Weaver wants us working together, because that gives me ample time to learn more. Maybe soon we'll even be best friends!
(I really, really want us to be best friends.)
Dear Diary,
Today has officially been the best day of my life.
Better than the day of my first mission, and my first victory against the enemies of the Horde. Better than the day both Lord Hordak and Shadow Weaver chose me to become Force Captain. Better even than the day I tried my very first cupcake and nearly died of bliss, it was so divine. No, today topped all of those days by a mile and a half. Is that statement correct? I'm not sure, but it's a close enough representation of how I feel about the past twenty-four hours. The past perfect, beautiful, incredible, awe-inspiring, victorious twenty-four hours. It's also been a very, very long day, so I'm writing this much later than I usually do; it may be lights out soon, but I'll try to jot down as much as I can before then.
I went to the Princess Prom! And I went with Catra! I was invited to the last Princess Prom, too, my being a princess and all, but I didn't go because a) it might have been considered to be consorting with the enemy, and b) I was ten years younger than I am now and wouldn't have been allowed to leave the premises of the Horde's headquarters back then anyway. My devious best friend, though -- and she is my best friend! -- thought up the perfect plan, and it involved going to the Prom, and dressing up and looking pretty, and having fun, and meeting people, and also at the same time being there because it was a mission for the Horde, approved by Lord Hordak himself, and have I ever mentioned how intelligent Catra is? If I haven't, let me just take a second to say it now: Catra is intelligent. Very, very intelligent. Nobody in the Horde had ever even imagined that the Princess Prom could have been a very useful road to defeating the Rebellion, yet Catra thought of the idea within minutes of hearing of its existence. Catra's often complained about her abilities not being recognized by anyone, and I think I might just be inclined to agree with her: it's not possible for someone to see how incredibly talented Catra is and not make her Force Captain sooner. Perhaps Shadow Weaver had her own reasons for not doing so; I don't want to judge her too harshly without knowing her true thoughts and feelings on the matter, you know? But I do believe that if Catra'd become a captain like me earlier, the Horde would have benefited greatly.
I'm getting off track. Princess Prom! The day went by without a hitch. Catra and I (and Lonnie, and Kyle, and Rogelio, but the people there didn't know that) were pretending to only be there for a fun time (Diary, I wore a dress! And I looked beautiful! And even Catra agreed!) but nobody could possibly have fathomed that our motives behind our actions were rather more... sinister. Sinister, ha. I like that word. I should use it more often. Well, to be fair, Adora did suspect something, so perhaps our sinister motives weren't as hidden as we assumed. Have I ever told you about Adora? She used to be Catra's best friend before she misguidedly left the Horde in order to ally with the princesses; from what I can make out of Catra's grumbling under her breath, she seems to be under the impression that Adora is yet another person like Shadow Weaver who never truly appreciated her worth and her quick mind, but I'm of a different opinion. Just the fact alone that Adora knew Catra well enough to understand that she probably had some bigger plan in mind, when nobody else did, is proof that she sees Catra's genius and doesn't underestimate her in the least! Then again, I may not have all the facts. At least Princess Frosta was quick to put an end t
Dear Diary,
Lights out stopped me from writing more last night, as you might have figured. I'm up early today to make up for that, though, so this time I'll actually give you the short version of the story instead of rambling on, I promise:
1) Princess Prom was fun!
2) We managed to steal Adora's huge, scary-looking but also kind of pretty magic sword!
3) We also captured Princess Glimmer and her fellow rebel Bow! I don't think the Horde has had a victory of this magnitude in the history of my time here!
4) Catra and I are best friends and are inseparable now!!
5) Well at any rate she's my best friend, and I might be hers too although she's never actually said it aloud, but making her say it out loud is next on my list!
6) Not this list, another one.
Time to go now; duty calls. Be back with an update on the whole situation tonight!
Dear Diary,
Have you ever cared about a person, cared about them very much, but known that you aren't as important to them, and might never be?
I suppose you haven't.
Dear Diary,
I'm sorry about last night's entry being so short as well as so sad; I wasn't in the best state then, and couldn't help but ponder some potential worst possible scenarios. But I'm feeling better now, so you needn't worry about me! I met a man today, whose name is Seahawk and seems like a pretty decent guy, even if we are technically enemies on the battlefield considering he's friends with the princesses and a part of the Rebellion while I'm here in the Horde, but we accidentally found ourselves in a sort of truce state -- long story, but I can tell you it involved a corrupted sword, lots of snow, and a couple of deadly centipede monsters -- and in that truce we had a very inspiring talk about shared difficulties, coming out of it much better people than we went in, I'm sure!
The talk was, as you might well have deduced, about unreciprocated emotions, and about the people we care most about not seeing us in the same light. Catra's my best friend, and has been almost since the moment we met, but I'm not hers: perhaps she's still hurting after Adora's abandoning her, and can't imagine having a new best friend so soon, or perhaps she's just too afraid of having a new best friend because they might leave her too, or perhaps it's just me she doesn't want to be best friends with, but that's alright. I'm not giving up on her, regardless of what she feels about me! Even if the feeling is anger and resentment following what happened today.
See, I had a choice before me: save Catra or retrieve the First Ones tech that corrupted Adora's sword. It didn't take very long to make my decision -- people will always be more important; Catra will always be more important -- but Catra was very displeased. She thought the tech was more important, as it might just be the key to a much more successful future for the Horde, and she's probably right, but I couldn't save it. She's pretty silent now, and hasn't been talking to me for a while, and I can tell she's unhappy with me about today's events, and there's nothing I can do to fix that right now, but it's better that she be unhappy and alive than... the alternative, right?
At least she's here.
Dear Diary,
I'm worried about Catra. I'm really, really worried about her. There was something very obviously wrong with her today, so I did the only thing I knew how to do to make things better, which meant wrapping her up in a blanket and singing her a lullaby, and it seemed to work, since she told me what was bothering her: Shadow Weaver escaped the dungeons. She's just been called by Lord Hordak about something, so I can't do any more to comfort her; I hope she's back soon, though. I know Shadow Weaver is significant to her, and this loss probably weighs far more heavily on her than it would on anyone else. She needs a friend by her side right now, and I don't think she'll find one in Lord Hordak's chambers.
Unless, of course, Entrapta's there. But I don't think Catra's been feeling too fond of her lately, and besides, she doesn't know Catra's troubles, so she won't know to console her.
Diary, I can't find Catra.
Dear Diary,
Elaboration on yesterday's entry: Catra's disappeared. She went inside Lord Hordak's rooms after she told me of Shadow Weaver's getaway and then never came out... or at least, didn't come out any time I was watching. I've searched the headquarters from top to bottom and haven't left a single place unexplored, but there is not a single sign of her.
I think Lord Hordak might have done something to her.
Hordak's little robot baby thing (what is it, exactly?) has been following me around, scuttling above my head ever since Catra went missing; I think it knows what she means to me. I don't want to write any more, in case it can read, so I'll stop here for now.
I miss Catra.
Dear Catra,
You will never read this. That's a promise, by the way, because if I find you I'll tell you everything that's written in this letter myself, word for word -- and I will find you. That's another promise. Maybe that leaves the writing of this letter pointless, but I'm writing it more for myself than for you, so there's that, I guess.
You've always said that nobody sees you for who you truly are. Adora left you for the princesses; Shadow Weaver overlooked your skills time and again in favor of Adora's; Lord Hordak, too, didn't appreciate your victories as much as he should have, focusing more on Entrapta's technologically inclined abilities. Here's the thing, though: I see you. I've always seen you, and acknowledged your talents and accomplishments, even if you've never really seen me. I know I'm not the person whose validation you seek, but I also wish you'd value yourself on your own without needing any other person's stamp of approval. You deserve that. You deserve to love yourself, as much as you deserve to have other people love you unconditionally, and I wish, oh how I wish you would understand that! I've been telling myself this for ages, but it doesn't matter if you think me your best friend or not: all I want is for you to know that I think you mine, to know that there's someone out there who cherishes you for who you are.
I'm leaving the Horde. It isn't because I suddenly disagree with their fight, which I don't, but because I need to find you. Even if it takes me a year and a half, I'll travel Etheria from end to end, leaving no stone unturned, no corner unsearched! I won't rest until I have you back by my side, safe from everyone who could possibly desire to hurt you. There's a raid scheduled on one of the Rebellion's smaller soldier outposts tomorrow, and I intend to sneak out during the fray before anyone notices. I can't take anything with me, as someone might think it suspicious, so I'll have to get all my provisions after I leave. That's only a tiny problem in the scheme of things, though: I'd rather face all the problems in the world than have to suffer even a single more moment wondering where you are, how you are.
I'm coming for you, best friend. Wait for me.
Yours always,
Scorpia
Pics
The star attraction here is the characterisation. The voicing here is pure Scorpia. And on the level of structure, this hits that note of overwhelming, optimistic, and slightly oblivious glee, followed by the moments of self-doubt we see in Season 2. I wish I could write character this well.
The emotional structure is simple but sharply drawn. Scorpia is great for making something feel light and fluffy, and this is where we start. The foreknowledge of Season 2's end remains a subtle tension. From there, things get darker and more difficult. The final entry is filled with pathos. We end with Scorpia's optimism too – but how much it has changed. We see her determination, her thoughtfulness, her the nerves of steel that lie beneath the blithe demeanour. And what a wonderful contrast that is. The latter is why we love her; the former is why we respect her.
If I have a gripe – and I'm not sure if I really do – it's with the lack of originality. Everything we see of Scorpia here, well-rendered as it is, is nothing that the show hasn't already given to us. Every entry apart the final one tells us about things we've seen firsthand.
But is this a problem? Is fanfic obliged to add something original? I'm not sure it is. It certainly didn't hurt my enjoyment of this story (which is odd, because I tend to penalise stories for lacking originality). What this story offers is a perspective, an (admittedly not new) way of looking at canonical events. I won't penalise it as such, but if another story does impress me with an original take, that's probably going to get a higher rank.
The emotional structure is simple but sharply drawn. Scorpia is great for making something feel light and fluffy, and this is where we start. The foreknowledge of Season 2's end remains a subtle tension. From there, things get darker and more difficult. The final entry is filled with pathos. We end with Scorpia's optimism too – but how much it has changed. We see her determination, her thoughtfulness, her the nerves of steel that lie beneath the blithe demeanour. And what a wonderful contrast that is. The latter is why we love her; the former is why we respect her.
If I have a gripe – and I'm not sure if I really do – it's with the lack of originality. Everything we see of Scorpia here, well-rendered as it is, is nothing that the show hasn't already given to us. Every entry apart the final one tells us about things we've seen firsthand.
But is this a problem? Is fanfic obliged to add something original? I'm not sure it is. It certainly didn't hurt my enjoyment of this story (which is odd, because I tend to penalise stories for lacking originality). What this story offers is a perspective, an (admittedly not new) way of looking at canonical events. I won't penalise it as such, but if another story does impress me with an original take, that's probably going to get a higher rank.
scramblers has already mentioned this, and typed out my own thoughts far better than i possibly could, so i'll limit myself to saying only that your characterization of scorpia, and the manner in which you have presented us with a view of her world, is remarkable. the format, too, causes this piece to stand out in its own way as unique.
the journey from season 1's scorpia to the scorpia of season 2 shows her growth from merely a surface-level, light-hearted character to a more introspective one. the one problem i as a reader experienced, however, was the sudden transition between the two types of entries: the mention of seahawk made me wonder for a second if the scene scorpia was about to describe was from the episode where adora and company rescued glimmer/bow from their brief captivity, only to read the line
and finally realize that there had been a notable time skip. a couple of extra diary entries, even if short, between Princess Prom and White Out and yes, i just googled the episode name, could help make the changeover smoother and therefore an easier read.
the journey from season 1's scorpia to the scorpia of season 2 shows her growth from merely a surface-level, light-hearted character to a more introspective one. the one problem i as a reader experienced, however, was the sudden transition between the two types of entries: the mention of seahawk made me wonder for a second if the scene scorpia was about to describe was from the episode where adora and company rescued glimmer/bow from their brief captivity, only to read the line
long story, but I can tell you it involved a corrupted sword, lots of snow, and a couple of deadly centipede monsters
and finally realize that there had been a notable time skip. a couple of extra diary entries, even if short, between Princess Prom and White Out and yes, i just googled the episode name, could help make the changeover smoother and therefore an easier read.
It rhymes with my own, too!
In this show, whose doesn't?
Anyway...
I already like the diary format, because you're doing a realistic job of it. It actually sounds like a diary. Too many authors call something a diary that isn't, but you're not falling into that trap. It makes me wonder if you're the author who wrote Scorpia's list of rules last time.
Ah, now we get the additional piece of information that Shadow Weaver hasn't been arrested yet. So you've pretty well established in the first entry who the players are and when this takes place (also with Scorpia having just met Catra for the first time). That makes for a good opening scene.
Actually, let me back up to the first line, because first lines are very important. This is a pretty good hook, too. A common one, and anyone who's watched the show will already know whom she's taking about, but that gets revealed within a few sentences anyway. It doesn't set up something terribly original, but the good character voicing and quality of writing do promise a good take on it, which is also a legit way to stand out.
Better than the day of my first mission, and my first victory against the enemies of the Horde.
Minor point, but this has me almost wanting some background. We never hear in the show much about what life was like before Hordak showed up. Does she have any good memories from then? I know her territory wasn't harmonious, and it may well have been a bad time for her. A careful phrasing here could imply a whole lot about that.
sinister motives
This has me curious as well. Adora and her former classmates were all brainwashed into thinking the princesses were evil. Does Scorpia buy into that? If she thinks she's actually doing the right thing here, would she still call it sinister? Maybe. Of course, she may be of a mind with Catra, too, who knows the truth and doesn't care.
At least Princess Frosta was quick to put an end t
This is well done, and reinforced by how the next entry starts. A lazy writer would have ended this with a dash, which of course would mean Scorpia would have actually written one on the page, and of course she didn't. This is an author who gets the details.
than... the alternative
Be very careful with this. I've been praising the realism of this as a diary, but things that are chiefly speech effects don't translate well into writing. It's not like she'd actually hesitate while writing, or even if she did, she wouldn't do something to indicate that. You're having her literally inscribe three dots on the page, and she'd have to have some purpose in doing so. I don't see what it is.
The part about Seahawk kind of threw me. I don't know that there's a good answer for it, but at first it sounded like you were diverting her romantic energies that direction, only for her to go right back to Catra. It might help if you finessed that a bit more.
I'll agree with the above comments that this isn't a novel topic to deal with, but the character work and depth of emotion raise it above that. For me, the main problem is one that comes up a lot in romance stories, and that's how so many things are left in vague terms. It's akin to a shipfic showing the happy couple already at the altar, and the narrator assuring us they're very much in love. Well, yes, it's not that I think the narrator is lying. It's that I don't have enough specific information to understand the relationship.
You had the space to, and the construction even supports it. When Scorpia's going over some of the past events, have her be more specific about what Catra did, and how Scorpia reacted to them. I'll drop back to general shipfics, but here's a quick example of what I mean.
"We went on a lot of great dates together."
That's fine, but it doesn't bring to mind any images or make my statement stand out above all the other romance stories out there.
"We went on a lot of great dates. Do you remember the one where we tried to have a picnic, but it started to rain hard, and we had to eat our sandwiches huddled against the trunk of a maple?"
Just a couple of specific examples do a whole lot to flesh out how they relate to each other and the get the reader invested. It really brings things to life. You're letting the reader see and judge a window into the relationship rather than just have to accept the narration's word for it. I think that kind of thing would have helped here, but you already have a good leg up by having great characterization and an authentic diary format.
Dear author who I’m pretty sure I know,
I think you’ve predicted a major plot point of the next season.
This gave me anxiety.
I think the leap from “Catra just disappeared and I’m worried” to “I’m defecting from my homeland” is too steep. There should be at least one more entry between the two, building up Scorpia’s reasons/willingness to leave.
I think you’ve predicted a major plot point of the next season.
Diary, I can't find Catra.
This gave me anxiety.
I think the leap from “Catra just disappeared and I’m worried” to “I’m defecting from my homeland” is too steep. There should be at least one more entry between the two, building up Scorpia’s reasons/willingness to leave.