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Aftercare
“What are you doing here?”
Fancypants has had a long afternoon, being the beloved face of elegance and esteem in Canterlot. Everywhere he went, he was swarmed by one too many admirers. They were all faces to him, all craving to be seen, to be recognized by name. Few had the privilege. Fewer deserve it.
When he finally got home, all he wanted was a good night’s sleep.
Instead, she was there, standing in the middle of his living room.
A face he'd recognize anywhere.
Before he could do anything, she pounced upon him, pinning him against the wall. She hissed, saliva dripping onto his suit. Her green eyes were seething, her fangs bared. Her tongue slobbered over his cheek, her arid pants loud and clear. In the face of that, Fancypants remained calm, until finally, she spoke.
“Sssss.... sssssstarving…”
He frowned. “Anyone saw you come in?”
She fervently shook her head.
He sighed before pushing her off. “Go upstairs and wait,” he instructed as he undid his tie.
She whined, to which he smiled.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be with you soon.”
She always liked it rough. She needed it rough. He would be aching in the morning, but everything else that came after was rewarding. She was a particularly tranquil soul in her afterglow. Sometimes, she would giggle beneath his touch. Sometimes, she would even purr under his tender caresses as he would chuckle under hers.
Sometimes, she wouldn’t.
“Fancy, do you have a camera I could use?”
Fancypants glanced up from the book between his hooves to the changeling sitting by his bedside. With his magic, he poured himself another glass of liquor, only to set it aside on his nightstand. “Anything I should be worried about?”
“No,” she spat before taking a gulp from her glass. “Nothing.”
“Good,” he remarked, nodding. “Was worried you were about to do something foolish.”
“It’s nothing I’ve never done before.”
“Okay.”
Fancypants returned to his book.
“Fancy, do you have a camera or not?”
He sighed. “You know, you should walk around town, get a new hobby here and there—”
“And let these thieving ponies get away with what they did? As if.”
“Last I remembered, you were the one who invaded us,” he reminded, earning a glare. “You wished for power.”
“I needed love.”
“You had me. All this time.”
“I needed more.”
“And in the end, you’ve lost everything. Was it worth it, Fleur?”
“Don’t call me that!” she growled. Fancypants merely furrowed his brows. “I’m Chrysalis, rightful queen of the Changelings, and I shall only be addressed as such.”
“You’re always Fleur to me, you know that. Need I remind you, if I hadn’t taken you in, you would’ve starved to death.” He placed his book away and reached for his glass. “Even after knowing what you were, I let you stay. I let you feed off me. Seven years, Fleur.” He downed his drink. “And now, look at what you’re doing. Going around crusading.”
She snorted. “Better that than being your trophy wife at snobbish parties.”
“You could always try being more open to them.”
She crossed her hooves. “It’s not like they would sate my hunger afterwards.”
“I would’ve forbidden it anyway. Infidelity isn't my brew of choice, so to speak.” Fancypants poured himself another glass. “I have friends who’ve asked you where you’ve gone, Fleur. You have a place here, you just don’t believe it yet. Want some more?”
She looked down at her empty glass, before bestowing it to him. “It’s not enough,” she muttered, watching the liquor rise.
“Hmm?”
“I can’t just feed on one source. I can kill you, Fancy.”
“You wouldn't.”
“I could’ve.”
“But you didn’t. I’ve had worse mornings.”
“Stop lying.”
“I will if you stop running around.”
“I’m not running around!" She slammed her glass down. "I’m trying to regain everything I had, everything I’ve lost! You can help me, you know! You, with your influence, with your power! Everyone here adores you! You could give it all to me, yet you wouldn’t!”
“You’re right. I won’t. Not now. Not ever. Because you’re better than that.”
Snarling, she downed her glass and stood up. “I’m leaving.”
“Alright,” he acquiesced. “Oh, and Fleur?”
She stopped in her tracks.
“There’s a camera in the storeroom. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
Fleur turned to him, green eyes glistening, before stomping off.
The silence that followed tempted Fancypants to reach for the bottle.
“I’ll always be here if you need me.”
Fancypants has had a long afternoon, being the beloved face of elegance and esteem in Canterlot. Everywhere he went, he was swarmed by one too many admirers. They were all faces to him, all craving to be seen, to be recognized by name. Few had the privilege. Fewer deserve it.
When he finally got home, all he wanted was a good night’s sleep.
Instead, she was there, standing in the middle of his living room.
A face he'd recognize anywhere.
Before he could do anything, she pounced upon him, pinning him against the wall. She hissed, saliva dripping onto his suit. Her green eyes were seething, her fangs bared. Her tongue slobbered over his cheek, her arid pants loud and clear. In the face of that, Fancypants remained calm, until finally, she spoke.
“Sssss.... sssssstarving…”
He frowned. “Anyone saw you come in?”
She fervently shook her head.
He sighed before pushing her off. “Go upstairs and wait,” he instructed as he undid his tie.
She whined, to which he smiled.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be with you soon.”
She always liked it rough. She needed it rough. He would be aching in the morning, but everything else that came after was rewarding. She was a particularly tranquil soul in her afterglow. Sometimes, she would giggle beneath his touch. Sometimes, she would even purr under his tender caresses as he would chuckle under hers.
Sometimes, she wouldn’t.
“Fancy, do you have a camera I could use?”
Fancypants glanced up from the book between his hooves to the changeling sitting by his bedside. With his magic, he poured himself another glass of liquor, only to set it aside on his nightstand. “Anything I should be worried about?”
“No,” she spat before taking a gulp from her glass. “Nothing.”
“Good,” he remarked, nodding. “Was worried you were about to do something foolish.”
“It’s nothing I’ve never done before.”
“Okay.”
Fancypants returned to his book.
“Fancy, do you have a camera or not?”
He sighed. “You know, you should walk around town, get a new hobby here and there—”
“And let these thieving ponies get away with what they did? As if.”
“Last I remembered, you were the one who invaded us,” he reminded, earning a glare. “You wished for power.”
“I needed love.”
“You had me. All this time.”
“I needed more.”
“And in the end, you’ve lost everything. Was it worth it, Fleur?”
“Don’t call me that!” she growled. Fancypants merely furrowed his brows. “I’m Chrysalis, rightful queen of the Changelings, and I shall only be addressed as such.”
“You’re always Fleur to me, you know that. Need I remind you, if I hadn’t taken you in, you would’ve starved to death.” He placed his book away and reached for his glass. “Even after knowing what you were, I let you stay. I let you feed off me. Seven years, Fleur.” He downed his drink. “And now, look at what you’re doing. Going around crusading.”
She snorted. “Better that than being your trophy wife at snobbish parties.”
“You could always try being more open to them.”
She crossed her hooves. “It’s not like they would sate my hunger afterwards.”
“I would’ve forbidden it anyway. Infidelity isn't my brew of choice, so to speak.” Fancypants poured himself another glass. “I have friends who’ve asked you where you’ve gone, Fleur. You have a place here, you just don’t believe it yet. Want some more?”
She looked down at her empty glass, before bestowing it to him. “It’s not enough,” she muttered, watching the liquor rise.
“Hmm?”
“I can’t just feed on one source. I can kill you, Fancy.”
“You wouldn't.”
“I could’ve.”
“But you didn’t. I’ve had worse mornings.”
“Stop lying.”
“I will if you stop running around.”
“I’m not running around!" She slammed her glass down. "I’m trying to regain everything I had, everything I’ve lost! You can help me, you know! You, with your influence, with your power! Everyone here adores you! You could give it all to me, yet you wouldn’t!”
“You’re right. I won’t. Not now. Not ever. Because you’re better than that.”
Snarling, she downed her glass and stood up. “I’m leaving.”
“Alright,” he acquiesced. “Oh, and Fleur?”
She stopped in her tracks.
“There’s a camera in the storeroom. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
Fleur turned to him, green eyes glistening, before stomping off.
The silence that followed tempted Fancypants to reach for the bottle.
“I’ll always be here if you need me.”
Pics
Really big fan of this story. The concept is interesting and makes sense, the characters are well-defined within a short wordcount. The writing quality is a tiny bit spotty – the hook isn't great and is a bit overly telly and the dialogue is a little dry in places – but when the writer hits his stride, the back-and-forth is fantastic and the narration is really great.
In particular this part:
Good stuff, writer.
In particular this part:
She always liked it rough. She needed it rough. He would be aching in the morning, but everything else that came after was rewarding. She was a particularly tranquil soul in her afterglow. Sometimes, she would giggle beneath his touch. Sometimes, she would even purr under his tender caresses as he would chuckle under hers.
Sometimes, she wouldn’t.
Good stuff, writer.
I had nearly the same reaction as >>Pearple_Prose above. For a few minutes, this fic really absorbed me and got me to care about these two. The stronger bits do a great job of carrying emotion and hinting at character building. And I've seen a lot of story concepts similar to this (especially with these characters), but this puts just the right twist on things that I didn't feel it was cliche.
But there are weaker parts that perhaps the author felt obligated to include, which I think are simply not needed. Like there's many lines meant to tie this into the show's canon timeline, but they feel kind of forced and telly. For example the camera, meant to hint at a specific s8 episode, but I didn't care much about that realization because I'd rather just watch these two interact for a while. In my opinion, it's okay to use canon, but don't feel constrained by it.
I actually liked the hook, but I feel like it's constructed out of order. The moment where I quickly recognize who the visitor is, yet Fancypants's reaction is the exact opposite of what I expected, that's when this grabbed my full attention! I think that feeling of horror is what needs to be front and center at the start, rather than that vague greeting and how his day went. I mean I do like that paragraph for establishing his character, it just shouldn't be the first one I read. Don't let it hog the spotlight.
I want to read more of this one.
But there are weaker parts that perhaps the author felt obligated to include, which I think are simply not needed. Like there's many lines meant to tie this into the show's canon timeline, but they feel kind of forced and telly. For example the camera, meant to hint at a specific s8 episode, but I didn't care much about that realization because I'd rather just watch these two interact for a while. In my opinion, it's okay to use canon, but don't feel constrained by it.
I actually liked the hook, but I feel like it's constructed out of order. The moment where I quickly recognize who the visitor is, yet Fancypants's reaction is the exact opposite of what I expected, that's when this grabbed my full attention! I think that feeling of horror is what needs to be front and center at the start, rather than that vague greeting and how his day went. I mean I do like that paragraph for establishing his character, it just shouldn't be the first one I read. Don't let it hog the spotlight.
I want to read more of this one.
I'm a little conflicted about Fancy. On the one hand, he wants Chrysalis to go out on her own and become a better bug-pony, presumably so she can stop depending on Fancy. On the other hand, he thinks her taking love from others is infidelity. So it's hard for me to understand what Fancy concretely, actually wants Chrysalis to do, which makes it difficult for me to feel bad when she chooses to do the wrong thing.
Still, unlike >>Haze I did enjoy the little ties back into canon, because I thought it gave a good frame of reference for where Chrysalis is, emotionally. And while I'm at it, I'll just say that I thought Chrysalis was great. I think most of my issues were with Fancy, honestly.
Still, unlike >>Haze I did enjoy the little ties back into canon, because I thought it gave a good frame of reference for where Chrysalis is, emotionally. And while I'm at it, I'll just say that I thought Chrysalis was great. I think most of my issues were with Fancy, honestly.
I was sucked into this pretty hard, too. I haven't personally seen this done with these two, so it was a fresh take for me. Echoing Haze, Fancy's reaction to his visitor does a fantastic job of setting up a "wait, what?" moment that pulls the story along smoothly.
Now, to >>Bachiavellian's confusion:
The impression I got is that there's a very thin intended line between her feeding and the (obviously implied) sex in terms of the writing. I think the feeding is the rough thing that leaves him sore (“I can’t just feed on one source. I can kill you, Fancy.”) and the sex is the "She was a particularly tranquil soul in her afterglow" bit. But then we get (“It’s not like they would sate my hunger afterwards.”) and it really mucks up my interpretation. Could be referring to sexual appetite, which makes more sense in context of Fancy's infidelity comment and smooths over him telling her to mingle more, but I'm torturing the text as-written to keep facing that direction.
So we'll go with the good old verdict of "it's not 100% clear" and we're right back to square one.
Now, to >>Bachiavellian's confusion:
The impression I got is that there's a very thin intended line between her feeding and the (obviously implied) sex in terms of the writing. I think the feeding is the rough thing that leaves him sore (“I can’t just feed on one source. I can kill you, Fancy.”) and the sex is the "She was a particularly tranquil soul in her afterglow" bit. But then we get (“It’s not like they would sate my hunger afterwards.”) and it really mucks up my interpretation. Could be referring to sexual appetite, which makes more sense in context of Fancy's infidelity comment and smooths over him telling her to mingle more, but I'm torturing the text as-written to keep facing that direction.
So we'll go with the good old verdict of "it's not 100% clear" and we're right back to square one.
This is probably the most creative spin on a picture that I saw on my preliminary ballot. It takes a very innovative mind to see "scary bug horse lady" and read "pseudotreasonous affair between two canon characters in which one is Actually Not What She Sees(tm)." The creativity of that premise, alone, is astonishing to me. Props.
The logic behind this relationship feels a little less than settled -- that Fleur was Chryssi all along is a twist which I enjoy conceptually, but which grinds against canon in a way that I'm having trouble reconciling. Fancypants fucking a literal enemy of the state on the down-low doesn't paint him in a very good light, either. The relationship, itself, is compelling and interesting and fraught with all the other trite adjectives that I usually insert into reviews when I don't know what else to say, but it doesn't paint Fancy in an especially sympathetic light.
I guess it says something about him that he's willing to entertain Chryssi at all...? But he also has her kinda wrapped around his finger because he's her only steady outlet for loveand orgasm endorphines...?? But he thinks that the queen of evil bug-thingies can be a good person if she just stays put and drops these flights of fancypants...??? So being evil is just her acting out because Woman maybe...?????
I don't think I'm quite able to put the pairing into perspective here, but damn, it's an interesting dynamic at least.
Loved the continuity bit with the cameras (I also like how consistent Chryssi's pouty behavior is with her portrayal in that episode; she kinda feels like an eviler version of Trixie, and Fancy a... more apathetic and perhaps less evil version of Glimmer). Found the expository section in the middle clunky, in an otherwise tightly written and structured fic. And, uh.
I dunno. I feel like Fancypants should wear a rainbow wig and clown nose, at least.
Shit, I need more coffee. 8/10.
The logic behind this relationship feels a little less than settled -- that Fleur was Chryssi all along is a twist which I enjoy conceptually, but which grinds against canon in a way that I'm having trouble reconciling. Fancypants fucking a literal enemy of the state on the down-low doesn't paint him in a very good light, either. The relationship, itself, is compelling and interesting and fraught with all the other trite adjectives that I usually insert into reviews when I don't know what else to say, but it doesn't paint Fancy in an especially sympathetic light.
I guess it says something about him that he's willing to entertain Chryssi at all...? But he also has her kinda wrapped around his finger because he's her only steady outlet for love
I don't think I'm quite able to put the pairing into perspective here, but damn, it's an interesting dynamic at least.
Loved the continuity bit with the cameras (I also like how consistent Chryssi's pouty behavior is with her portrayal in that episode; she kinda feels like an eviler version of Trixie, and Fancy a... more apathetic and perhaps less evil version of Glimmer). Found the expository section in the middle clunky, in an otherwise tightly written and structured fic. And, uh.
I dunno. I feel like Fancypants should wear a rainbow wig and clown nose, at least.
Shit, I need more coffee. 8/10.
Just from the title, I'm expecting something BDSM related.
Okay.
1) Why is she wearing pants?
2) What is the purpose of wearing pants if they're clear?
3) The pants are loud? Made of cellophane or what?
:P
I've not seen all of season 8 so the whole camera bit was confusing and didn't seem to have anything to do with the rest of the story. I get that it's a nod to canon, but I feel it's unnecessary and just wastes words that could have been used to give us more of this delicious interaction.
I liked the love/hate relationship, the dependence and rejection of independence. Chrysalis as a resentful sub and Fancy as a reluctant dom.
Upon a second reading, I'm not sure that's accurate. There's a complex and interesting power dynamic here. Chrysalis seems to be topping from the bottom, but Fancy is still in many ways in charge of the relationship as a whole... yet still trying to help her become independent, even as she rejects his direction and his attempts to help.
This is good, and the majority of it is tightly written. I agree with the others that the opening could have been better, but it's still top tier for sure.
her arid pants loud and clear.
Okay.
1) Why is she wearing pants?
2) What is the purpose of wearing pants if they're clear?
3) The pants are loud? Made of cellophane or what?
:P
I've not seen all of season 8 so the whole camera bit was confusing and didn't seem to have anything to do with the rest of the story. I get that it's a nod to canon, but I feel it's unnecessary and just wastes words that could have been used to give us more of this delicious interaction.
I liked the love/hate relationship, the dependence and rejection of independence. Chrysalis as a resentful sub and Fancy as a reluctant dom.
Upon a second reading, I'm not sure that's accurate. There's a complex and interesting power dynamic here. Chrysalis seems to be topping from the bottom, but Fancy is still in many ways in charge of the relationship as a whole... yet still trying to help her become independent, even as she rejects his direction and his attempts to help.
This is good, and the majority of it is tightly written. I agree with the others that the opening could have been better, but it's still top tier for sure.
>>Pearple_Prose, >>Haze, >>Bachiavellian, >>Rao, >>Posh, >>Hap
So this did better than I expected.
First of, just wanna say thanks to everyone for the comments! Really glad everyone enjoyed the banter between these two. Also special thanks to Zaid for the art. Good stuff, man.
So, like what Bachi said, the idea behind the camera was to give a sense of where Chrysalis was emotionally and also situationally. She had lost her entire hive and she's desperate to get it back, but she also needs to sate her hunger, so in this story, she turns to the one pony she knew would never deny her that.
The opening, I agree, could be a lot better. I think it turned out this way because, frankly, the relationship between Fancy and Chryssi I had intended for this story was a lot simpler, but as time went on, it became rather complicated to nail down that relationship of theirs properly without keeping it interesting in such a short span of time. In the end, the essence of the relationship was still there, but the change was still rather drastic, which is why I opened it as such to cede some information to the reader: it was meant to imply how Fancypants views Chrysalis in general, which I'll get into in a bit. Of course, it's still done with vagueness in mind, so yeah.
On that note, Fancypants.
The relationship between him and Chrysalis in this story is definitely complicated, mostly on Fancy's part. They do love each other and have been with each other for seven years, but at this stage, there's also a lot of dishonesty regarding their feelings of each other thanks to the circumstances, with the liquor being sort of a marker for their honesty. Chrysalis was a lot less subtle about admitting it. Fancypants, on the other hand, was much more careful, albeit he does slip up from time to time. His feelings for her, however, are much stronger than hers for him, which is where things start to seem sketchy for him.
From the opening, the context I gave was that Fancypants thought condescendingly little of the admiration other ponies had for him. The whole 'one too many admirers' and 'Few had the privilege. Fewer deserve it' was there to paint that. The idea that ponies would flock to him as if he were some sort of god disgusts him. However, it's also meant to serve as a connection to how he views Chrysalis, all via a single twist of a word:
'Recognize', in this case, had its definition twisted to mean 'reverence'.
Basically, Fancypants loves her to an unsettling degree. Fancypants wants her to come back to him, wants her to feed on him and only him. Fancypants genuinely believes she won't kill him because he loves her just that much and no one else could ever do that. He would've forbidden anyone else to have sex with her because how dare they? In the end, he lets her have the camera because he suspected, deep down, that she was going to fail, and once she did, she'll come back to him by her own will, as if it was meant to be. The final lines of each scene (“Don’t worry. I’ll be with you soon.” and “I’ll always be here if you need me.”) was honestly what I intended to be the hook of the story.
Of course, there's another layer to this, which might open up to why he was acting contradictorily.
Fancypants loves Fleur, but not Queen Chrysalis.
Fleur was the Chrysalis he fell in love with. The Fleur he took in seven years ago was the pony he loved. That was why he refuses to address or even view her as Chrysalis. There was a point of time where Chrysalis wasn't hell-bent on world domination, that she was satisfied with what she had, but once she invaded Canterlot, it was a point of no return. Nevertheless, Fancy remains determined on trying to bring Fleur back, albeit really carefully ('you should walk around town, get a new hobby', 'I have friends who’ve asked you where you’ve gone, Fleur' and Because you’re better than that) for fear of losing her love entirely. He believes that, in the end, Fleur will return to him after all her efforts are in vain.
As for Chrysalis? Fortunately (or unfortunately), she's innocent in all of this. She still loves Fancy, but she doesn't want to admit it, and that's it.
I guess in the end, there's supposed to be a moral about the magnitudes of evil and what will be considered acceptable and such, but I'm not intelligent enough to go there.
Again, thanks for reading!
So this did better than I expected.
First of, just wanna say thanks to everyone for the comments! Really glad everyone enjoyed the banter between these two. Also special thanks to Zaid for the art. Good stuff, man.
So, like what Bachi said, the idea behind the camera was to give a sense of where Chrysalis was emotionally and also situationally. She had lost her entire hive and she's desperate to get it back, but she also needs to sate her hunger, so in this story, she turns to the one pony she knew would never deny her that.
The opening, I agree, could be a lot better. I think it turned out this way because, frankly, the relationship between Fancy and Chryssi I had intended for this story was a lot simpler, but as time went on, it became rather complicated to nail down that relationship of theirs properly without keeping it interesting in such a short span of time. In the end, the essence of the relationship was still there, but the change was still rather drastic, which is why I opened it as such to cede some information to the reader: it was meant to imply how Fancypants views Chrysalis in general, which I'll get into in a bit. Of course, it's still done with vagueness in mind, so yeah.
On that note, Fancypants.
The relationship between him and Chrysalis in this story is definitely complicated, mostly on Fancy's part. They do love each other and have been with each other for seven years, but at this stage, there's also a lot of dishonesty regarding their feelings of each other thanks to the circumstances, with the liquor being sort of a marker for their honesty. Chrysalis was a lot less subtle about admitting it. Fancypants, on the other hand, was much more careful, albeit he does slip up from time to time. His feelings for her, however, are much stronger than hers for him, which is where things start to seem sketchy for him.
From the opening, the context I gave was that Fancypants thought condescendingly little of the admiration other ponies had for him. The whole 'one too many admirers' and 'Few had the privilege. Fewer deserve it' was there to paint that. The idea that ponies would flock to him as if he were some sort of god disgusts him. However, it's also meant to serve as a connection to how he views Chrysalis, all via a single twist of a word:
They were all faces to him, all craving to be seen, to be recognized by name.
A face he'd recognize anywhere.
'Recognize', in this case, had its definition twisted to mean 'reverence'.
Basically, Fancypants loves her to an unsettling degree. Fancypants wants her to come back to him, wants her to feed on him and only him. Fancypants genuinely believes she won't kill him because he loves her just that much and no one else could ever do that. He would've forbidden anyone else to have sex with her because how dare they? In the end, he lets her have the camera because he suspected, deep down, that she was going to fail, and once she did, she'll come back to him by her own will, as if it was meant to be. The final lines of each scene (“Don’t worry. I’ll be with you soon.” and “I’ll always be here if you need me.”) was honestly what I intended to be the hook of the story.
Of course, there's another layer to this, which might open up to why he was acting contradictorily.
Fancypants loves Fleur, but not Queen Chrysalis.
Fleur was the Chrysalis he fell in love with. The Fleur he took in seven years ago was the pony he loved. That was why he refuses to address or even view her as Chrysalis. There was a point of time where Chrysalis wasn't hell-bent on world domination, that she was satisfied with what she had, but once she invaded Canterlot, it was a point of no return. Nevertheless, Fancy remains determined on trying to bring Fleur back, albeit really carefully ('you should walk around town, get a new hobby', 'I have friends who’ve asked you where you’ve gone, Fleur' and Because you’re better than that) for fear of losing her love entirely. He believes that, in the end, Fleur will return to him after all her efforts are in vain.
As for Chrysalis? Fortunately (or unfortunately), she's innocent in all of this. She still loves Fancy, but she doesn't want to admit it, and that's it.
I guess in the end, there's supposed to be a moral about the magnitudes of evil and what will be considered acceptable and such, but I'm not intelligent enough to go there.
Again, thanks for reading!