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This is a beautiful episode of Doctor Who waiting to happen.
Ohmygosh, I loved this story. The setting invites so many questions, the government is so evil but in a completely understandable way and it's not another cookie-cutter Orwellian Future, it's something really creative and new. I love everything about this.
Ohmygosh, I loved this story. The setting invites so many questions, the government is so evil but in a completely understandable way and it's not another cookie-cutter Orwellian Future, it's something really creative and new. I love everything about this.
I feel like this has already won. I especially liked how the little girl's side was written.b
Some editing flaws, and it sorta alternates between really good lines and kinda ackward ones.
It sounds like something an old geezer would right, and I love geezers.
It sounds like something an old geezer would right, and I love geezers.
>>This is a game I lost
Oh, don't forget The Iron Horse. I would back Turning Test against any other A.I as the most interesting and well-developed robot ever written.
Anyway, I agree that the idea of a "To Kill a Mockingbird" style story about a girl and her robot is something that appeals to me, but it needs a little more expansion and worldbuilding to really stand out. I hope you revisit this idea in the future.
Oh, don't forget The Iron Horse. I would back Turning Test against any other A.I as the most interesting and well-developed robot ever written.
Anyway, I agree that the idea of a "To Kill a Mockingbird" style story about a girl and her robot is something that appeals to me, but it needs a little more expansion and worldbuilding to really stand out. I hope you revisit this idea in the future.
Hm. I did like some of the creativity in play here, especially the notion of a cop in a magic land. It wasn't quite perfect; The IRL stuff bugged me a little (though I'm not sure why) and the title is a big spoiler. The sheer coincidence of Sarah finding her grandson is a little hard to swallow. I think just saving someone's little kid, making that metaphorically about saving her son, and then her leaving to go on a quest would have been better,.
"Very." I felt the magic swirl in my chest, and took another gulp of my drink. The burn of the rum couldn't cut the chill in my lungs, but it did take the edge off. "You may have heard of Incursions before."
"Fuck."
"Yeah."
Okay, this was great. I got a solid John Constantine vibe from this (though I really should read Hellblaiser, I've only seen him on the DCW) and I like all the details the world has. Pretty solid!
I like the Gaslamp Tech angle you took, but the story felt a little slow. Taking a more lighthearted, comedic tone might have been better. Still great!
Post by
Kai_Creech
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