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Best Laid Plans · FiM Minific ·
Organised by RogerDodger
Word limit 400–750
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Schoolyard Crush
Scootaloo banged her hoof on the lectern. “Alright, listen up! We have a new mission!”

“Are we finally doing our homework?” Sweetie Belle asked. She had her saddlebags off and her textbooks laid out on the clubhouse floor.

“Are we going to try and get Rainbow Dash to call you her sister again?” Apple Bloom lounged beside the window.

“No! Something better!” Scootaloo yanked away the black cloth covering the easel, revealing a hoof-drawn picture of a young pegasus. “We’re going to kiss Rumble!”

That got their attention.

“What?” Sweetie stuck out her tongue. “Ew! No! Ewww!”

Apple Bloom frowned. “Why Rumble? Why not Truffle Shuffle?”

“Because this my plan and I say we’re going to kiss Rumble. Now, he sits next to Sweetie Belle, so she has the best chance to—”

“Stop!” Sweetie pushed between them. “Why do we want to kiss any colt? They’re dirty and icky!”

“Look, we’re big fillies, right?” Scootaloo waited for them to nod. “This is what big fillies and colts do. They kiss and sit next to each other and make silly faces.”

“Yeah, but why?” Apple Bloom asked.

“I dunno. Who cares? The point is, we’re going to kiss Rumble. Now, Sweetie Belle, you—”

“No!”

“Ugh, fine.” Scootaloo turned to Apple Bloom. “Apple Bloom, you kinda sit close to Rumble, so in class tomorrow you pass him this note, and then we’ll—”

“Why can’t we kiss Truffle Shuffle, again?”

Scootaloo stomped her hoof. “Because I said we’re kissing Rumble! Now, you pass him this note, and we’ll meet him at recess.”

“Then what? We kiss him?”

“No.” Scootaloo sat and rubbed her hooves together. “Then we start phase two.”




The Crusaders sat in the corner of the classroom, faces toward the wall. Behind them, Cheerilee fussed over Rumble, who was sniffling. The rest of the class, supposedly still at recess, crowded around the windows to peer inside.

“Really?” Apple Bloom hissed under her breath. “That was your plan? Put gum in his mane?”

“I thought it would work!” Scootaloo hissed back.

“How? How could that make him want to kiss you?”

“Look, I… Shut up.”

Sweetie sniffed. “Rarity’s going to k-kill me.”

“She’s not going to kill you. And we can still fix this, okay? I have a new plan.”




“Okay, so, tossing snowballs didn’t work. And now we’re grounded.”

“Don’t worry. I have a new plan. Apple Bloom, you and Sweetie are going to...”




“Can’t we just get him flowers or something?” Sweetie asked. She bobbled the water balloon nervously between her hooves.

“What? Why?” Scootaloo unhitched her scooter from the wagon, which held a small arsenal of additional water balloons.

“Rarity says when you want a colt to like you, you should be nice and get him flowers and tell him he smells good and—”

“Huh?” Apple Bloom broke in. “We don’t want him to like us. We just want to kiss him.”

“But—”

“Seriously, Sweetie, let us do the planning,” Scootaloo said. She hefted a balloon in her hooves. “Okay, here he comes.”




The Crusaders hustled into the clubhouse and slammed the door, panting. Outside, they heard angry sister voices, though still faint. They had some time.

“Now look what you did!” Sweetie said. “We’re in trouble again!”

“Nah, we’ll be fine.” Scootaloo peeked out the window. “Oop, they’re coming this way. Act casual.”

“I bet we could’ve kissed Truffle Shuffle by now,” Apple Bloom said.

“Ugh, maybe. Should we try him tomorrow?”

“No!” Sweetie scowled at them. “This is a stupid idea! Who cares about kissing?”

“Big fillies do, Sweetie Belle,” Scootaloo said. “It’s, like, important. I think.”

“How is it important?”

“It just is! We’ll understand when we do it!”

“Oh really?” Sweetie stomped over to Scootaloo and grabbed her face with both hooves. Before she could react, Sweetie pulled her in and mashed their muzzles together.

They broke apart an instant later, spitting and gagging.

“Ew! Ugh!” Sweetie rubbed her lips with the back of her hoof.

“Blegh!” Scootaloo spat on the floor. “Sweetie, what was that?!”

“You wanted a kiss!”

“Yeah, but not from you!”

“Ugh!” Sweetie tossed up her hooves and stormed out the door. Outside, they faintly heard Rarity’s shrill voice berating her sister.

“Umm…” Apple Bloom shuffled her hooves. “So, how was it?”

“Terrible.” Scootaloo frowned at the floor. “Well, I dunno. Weird.”

“Oh.”

The silence stretched out.

“So, uh, can I try?” Apple Bloom asked.

There was another pause.

“Yeah, I guess.”
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