“So, uh, thank you both for coming today,” Twilight Sparkle said. She tapped her index cards on the table for the fourth time, making sure their edges were perfectly aligned. “I know it’s, uh, a long trip, and—”

“I live here,” Starlight Glimmer said.

“Well, not [i]you[/i] you, obviously. I was thanking her for coming a long way. But, uh, thank you too, Starlight.”

“You’re welcome,” Sunset Shimmer said. “Nice castle.”

“So, why are we here?” Starlight asked. She peered around the Friendship Castle map room. “And why are the girls all here?”

‘Hi! Hiiiii!” Pinkie waved at them. “Sunset! Hiiii!”

“Hi Pinkie.”

“Yeah, why are we here?” Rainbow Dash asked. She yawned. “You made me get up early for a meeting?”

“It’s noon, Dash.” Twilight tapped her index cards on the table again. “Anyway! This is a very important day for Equestria and for all of us. After Flurry Heart was born, Cadence, Luna, Celestia and I agreed that Equestria needs more alicorns. So, based on your unparalleled accomplishments and experiences, I would like to ask the two of you—”

“YES! YES!” Starlight shouted. She jumped upright, throwing her hooves into the air. “I knew it! I knew it! Oh, thank you! Thank you Celestia!”

“Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh it’s really happening, isn’t it?” Sunset let out a sob. Tears ran down her cheeks in dark tracks. “I thought, I thought it would never happen after all those mistakes I made! But I kept hoping and praying and telling myself that friendship would win in the end and I was right! Thank you Twilight Sparkle!”

“Okay, uh, wait—”

“What am I the princess of?” Starlight spun in a circle, her eyes darting around the room. “Is there a new element? How about Sorcery? I could do that. I could totally do that!”

“Calling it now, Princess of Fire,” Sunset said. “No, no, Princess of [i]Magical[/i] Fire!”

“Sunset!” Starlight cried. She wrapped the other mare in a tight embrace. “We’re going to be princesses!”

“Oh, you deserve it!” Sunset sobbed. “The moment I saw you, I knew you [i]deserved[/i] to be a princess! You’ve overcome so many obstacles, saved Equestria—”

“Okay, stop.” Twilight gavelled her hoof onto the table, stunning the room into silence. “Let me clarify: we’re not turning you both into alicorns. Instead we’re—”

She got no further. The two mares gasped simultaneously and jumped away from each other. Their horns lit, filling the air with an electric charge, like a meadow waiting for the first strike of lightning from a spring thunderstorm.

“So, that’s your game?” Starlight growled. “Only one of us gets to be the next princess? Very well! I will settle this quickly.”

“Ha! You?” Tiny flickers of flame danced in the air around Sunset’s mane. “I knew you for the mewling little sycophant you are the moment I saw you. I will wipe this castle clean with your hide!”

A magical switchblade snapped open beside Starlight. Its edge glittered, as wicked as the snarl on her face. “Bitch! You think I haven’t been preparing for this day? I waited years for this!”

Sunset howled in response and dove forward, leading with her horn. Sunset met her charge. The air snapped and burned with violent magical energies. Errant bolts of lightning scored the crystal walls black. Fires hotter than a dragon’s breath turned the silken tapestries above into drifting ash. A terrible, all-consuming roar filled the hall as the two contestants grappled with each other, hooves hammering into flesh, shaking the castle to its foundation with each blow. The crystal floor cracked beneath them, no match for the terrible forces unleashed by each mare upon her foe.

“Stallions!”

The room froze. The battered combatants staggered apart. Sunset licked blood from her muzzle. “What?”

“Stallions,” Twilight continued. “We decided Equestria needs an alicorn stallion. We want you two to help us find the right one.”

Silence. Little bits of flaming tapestry drifted through the air. Rarity brushed one off her shoulder, leaving a smear of soot behind.

“Oh,” Starlight said. “Oh.”

Sunset sat. “Huh.”

More silence.

“But…” Starlight tilted her head. “If I marry that stallion… yes! I can still be a princess!”

She vanished in a flash of magic. Sunset gasped, stood, and galloped out the door in pursuit.

A profound silence settled on them like an ashen pall. There was also a real ashen pall, of course. Fluttershy coughed quietly.

Finally, Rainbow Dash spoke for them all.

“I thought Starlight was gay.”