The brony awoke before dawn. He put his open-toed sandals on.

Stepping softly, he crept down the hall of his urban home, into the room where his baby sister slept. He tiptoed up to the edge of her crib. She was fast asleep.

The brony reached around into his messenger bag, and pulled out his beloved Pinkie Pie plushie. Giving it one last kiss, he set it down next to his sister.

“Pinkie’s yours, now, Claire... I’m sorry I won’t be around to watch you play with her.”

Turning from Claire’s crib, the brony exited the room to pay his kid brother a visit.

“Jeremy,” he whispered through the cracked door, but received no response. He reached back into his messenger bag and pulled out a short stack of papers.

[i]This fanfiction I wrote will explain everything perfectly,[/i] the brony thought, [i]in a way that even a grade-school kid like you can understand.[/i]

The brony left his fanfiction on his brother’s desk, and walked on down the hall.

At the end of the hall, he came to a door. He considered looking inside, but his courage failed him. There was simply no way to explain what he was about to do to his parents.

So he left a Post-It note on their door. It read:

[quote]Gone to Equestria
Won’t be back
I love you[/quote]

With that, the brony returned downstairs. He looked around one last time; then, turning with a flourish, he opened the front door, never to return.

[hr]

“This is it,” the brony said. “This is my portal to Equestria.”

He looked down from an empty highway bridge, down at the rushing waters of a river flowing over jagged rocks. A blue bus drove past.

"It's not very far..." The brony started shaking nervously. "Just... move... your little rump..." He lifted first one leg over the guardrail, then the other, until he was sitting unencumbered atop the rail, looking down.

"You can make it... if you try..." The rushing water harshly reflected the morning sun, and the brony was practically paralyzed with fear and vertigo.

"With a hop..." He was suddenly wracked with a wave of nausea.

"Skip..."

Tears leaked down his face. Taking one last forlorn look at the city he was leaving, the brony closed his eyes tightly, and shut everything out of his mind except a vision of the celestial city he was headed toward, for which he was leaving the earthly city.

"And jump!"

[hr]

As planned, the brony landed in Equestria. And it was even more wonderful than he had imagined it.

The mane six were already at his landing pad, forming a welcome party to meet him. Pinkie Pie, of course, led the cheering.

"Whoopie! Another suicide from Earth has come to live with us!" she yelled. "SUICIDE PARTY!" Pinkie's party cannon punctuated her final outburst.

The brony was overwhelmed, and in shock. "Wow... you mean, it really worked? Killing myself really brought me to Equestria? Is this real life?"

Applejack trotted forward and offered the brony a large mug of apple cider. "It sure as shootin' is, sugarcube. Would I lie to you?"

The brony had to admit that she had a point there. "So, then, does... does everyone who dies come here?"

"Every day, many humans from Earth die," Twilight Sparkle explained. "But only a small fraction of them actually come to Equestria when they do. The trick is to [i]believe[/i] with all your heart that it will happen. If you do that while you're dying, you're guaranteed to land safely, either here in Ponyville or in another major city."

"Only the super-smart ones realize they can just kill themselves and cut out the waiting," Rainbow Dash chimed in. "After all, why [i]wait[/i] for something to happen, when you can [i]make[/i] it happen?"

Fluttershy managed a whisper. "Mister Brony, would it be all right with you, if, um... if I asked you for belly rubs?"

Rarity was blushing intensely, evidently remaining silent to hide her intense physical arousal.

The brony was overcome with ecstatic joy, and broke out into a monologue:

"Suicide is the best thing that has ever happened to me! If only the other bronies on Earth knew what was waiting for them here, they'd all kill themselves within a week!" He smiled broadly, but quickly became more sober. "If only there was some way to get this message out to them..."

Twilight Sparkle grinned. "Oh, I think I know a way..."

Then—she winked at you, dear reader.