“So what I’m saying, Fluttershy, is that if us five teamed up, we could totally kick Twilight’s flank. I mean, yeah. She’s powerful and all, but—what? Don’t stare at me like that! It’s not like we’re [i]actually[/i] going to kick her flank. Although we totally could.” “Mm.” Fluttershy went back to staring at the Sugarcube Corner kitchen. She leaned back in her chair, twiddling her mane. Nearby, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Applejack were having some high-stakes baking competition that Pinkie had devised. “Technically, it’s the six of us,” said Mudbriar. He was standing, despite the empty chairs surrounding him. Rainbow Dash paused, raising an eyebrow. “Right. You’re here. Anyways”—she resumed shifting left and right, creaking the chair along with her—“what do you think, Fluttershy? You’ve gotta have an answer.” “Oh, I do,” said Fluttershy. She balled up a strand of hair in her hoof, then let it go. “I just don’t like disagreeing with you, is all.” Rainbow Dash paused again, leaning forward intently. “Oh? Well don’t just leave it at that.” “Well, she is the most powerful pony in Equestria. And as much as I hate to say it, if she caught one of”—she glanced at Mudbriar—“us five, and threatened to harm her, the other four would probably give up.” “Technically, it doesn’t matter if she’s the most powerful pony. Taking into account estimations of skill and power, there always exists some sufficient group of ponies that could overcome her.” “Ha!” Rainbow Dash pointed a triumphant hoof at Fluttershy. “Even Mudbriar agrees with me! This battle is as good as won.” She closed her eyes, bobbing her head in some victory dance. Fluttershy wasn’t listening. She was focused on Rarity, who was screaming, as Pinkie Pie ran circles around her caked in flour. Mudbriar cleared his throat and continued, “Technically, considering the premise, that would be untrue. The philosopher Sunny Zoo once said, ‘Every battle is won or lost before it’s ever fought.’ Twilight, being a fan of books, already knows this.” He shut his eyes, lifting a solemn hoof. “So if she chose to take on all five of you at once, that would mean she was already confident of her outcome before it even started.” Rainbow Dash slammed her head on the table. “Booo.” She looked at Fluttershy, then at Applejack, who was now handling a knife blindfolded, then back at Mudbriar. “So who do you think would win then, smarty pants?” “Technically, there is no correct answer. For example, you could be the aggressors, and Twilight would not be fighting on her own terms. Or, maybe you would hesitate, and Twilight would not.” “But that’s such a [i]boring[/i] answer,” groaned Rainbow Dash. “You’re saying there’s not even, like, a percentage you can give?” “Myes.” Pinkie Pie interrupted before Rainbow could respond. “Hey girls! Look how high I can turn the oven up! Wheee!” Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, then turned back to face Mudbriar. “Do you, like, have an opinion on [i]anything[/i]?” Mudbriar furrowed his brow. “I’m sorry?” “Well”—Rainbow Dash ducked, narrowly avoiding the toaster flung above her head—”I mean, you’re always stating some fact, or quoting some old dude. So what do you think about things? Or do you think those [i]darned[/i] opinions [i]decay[/i] the [i]mind[/i].” Mudbriar lifted a hoof again. “Technically, Sunny Zoo was relatively young when he gave that quote. Given—” he wilted under Rainbow’s sharp glare. “C-could you give an example?” Fluttershy, without looking away from the kitchen, said, “Well, Pinkie Pie is currently on fire, and Rarity and Applejack can’t seem to contain her. So, should we help?” Mudbriar nodded. “Myes.” “Why? Because we don’t let friends die?” “Myes.” Fluttershy scrunched up her face, then sneezed. “Sorry, must be the smoke. Why not? Why does it make a difference if Pinkie lives or dies?” Sweat started building on Mudbriar’s forehead. “Because, because…” He stiffened, and turned towards the door. “I’m going. Maud is in the shop across the street.” Then he left. [hr] The next day, Maud found Rainbow Dash in the hospital. Mudbriar was behind her, staring at the ground. “Sorry about yesterday,” said Maud. “I asked Mudbriar to write a story detailing his own opinions as an apology. Here.” Rainbow Dash took the manuscript and read, occasionally giving a “hmm” or a “huh” while scratching her mane. When she finished, she said, “Wow, Mudbriar, that’s pretty cool. I didn’t know we thought [i]so[/i] alike. You really believe this?” Mudbriar smiled, and lied for the first time in his life.