Was it a migraine? No, it couldn’t be a migraine.  Those types of headaches occurred for no adequately explained reason.  This cause was directly across from her and its name was John Beasley. 

Lyra had always been fascinated by parapsychology and cryptozoology.  It was the reason why she’d badgered her roommate Bon-Bon about her time at S.M.I.L.E and what types of creatures they’d come across in their field operations.  After a while though stories weren’t enough, she wanted to actually see some of the fantastic creatures that she’d dealt with during those years.  Finally, after months of poking and prodding Bon-Bon relented and introduced her to one that she deemed safe enough.  

The evening started off questionably enough when Bon-Bon shoved her roommate through the front door of the spaghetti place after pointing the odd creature out.  It was what she referred to as a human.  It was rotund, sweaty, was cursed with failing eyesight and some sort of gum disease or at least its breath smelled like it.  It lacked most of its body hair save for the mass of brown on top of its head along with a few loose strands that dotted its face.

From the moment she took her seat the creature had pummeled her with questions and theories about ponies.  It was a nonstop assault on her ears that only ceased when it asked a question that required her response.  It had been ten minutes since it’d stopped talking long enough for her to respond to anything.  So, she tuned it out.

“Earth to Lyra,” said John.

“What,” asked Lyra as she rubbed her right temple after finally hearing her name.

“I was asking you if you had ever considered the act of interspecies…”

Lyra zoned out again.  Was this thing, this human using its psionic abilities on her? Was her head going to explode like a pumpkin stuffed with lit fireworks?  It felt like it.  The sound of its nasally voice clawed at the back of her eyes as she looked behind him toward the window and into the night sky.  She hoped for a miracle.

Suddenly a shooting star rocketed across it.  Lyra gasped and quickly made a wish that her head would explode in five seconds.  It would be worth it.  She would finally be away from this John Beasley.  Mentally she counted backwards: Five, Four, Three, Two, One, Zero.  Damn!

“… lesbian?”

Lyra’s eyes ticked over to her dinner companion. “What was that?”

“I asked if you were a lesbian.  I mean it was pretty clear in Rainbow Rocks when you were playing the piano with Bon-Bon…”

“What is Rainbow Rocks?  For that matter what’s a lesbian?”

John scoffed at her, “Oh you know what that is.”

“No,” replied Lyra sharply, “I was born in Ponyville.  I’ve never even heard of a country called Lesbia or Lesbos for me to even be a Lesbian.  I’m an Equestrian through and through!”

“No. I mean are you attracted to mares. Because you didn’t say anything in regard to the sexiness of yours truly,” it said smiling.

Lyra’s eye twitched, “I… have a boyfriend that works in the shipping department at….”

“Yo Ho,” shouted John as it began to laugh, “I bet he does!”

“The postal service you round….”  Lyra took a deep breath and mentally counted to ten.

“But if that’s true… then why were you and Bon-Bon so close during that part where you two were playing the piano in Rainbow…”

“Okay just stop right there,” said Lyra as she raised a hoof, “I don’t play piano.  She doesn’t play piano as far as I know.  You’re talking about things that somehow you’ve made up or seen that don’t exist. If I have to listen to one more…”

“Hello you two,” said a familiar voice from behind Lyra, “So, how are things going tonight?” 

“Bon-Bon,” shouted Lyra who quickly jumped out of her chair and embraced her roommate.

“Ha! Hashtag confirmed!”

“How do I make it stop? It’s boring holes into my brain!”

Bon-Bon chuckled, “Are you done pestering me about S.M.I.L.E?”

“I just want to go home, eat aspirin and take a bath!”

Bon-Bon raised an eye brow at Lyra who promptly nodded confirming that she was done. “Okay then just follow me out of the restaurant and ignore him and his jabbering.  Eventually he’ll wander into the Everfree forest.  They always do.” 

With that the two mares walked out of the restaurant and never spoke of that night’s events again.