"Oh thank god you called! Where are you? We're on in ten, and you know how these guys are about punctuality!" "Listen, I don't think I'ma make it. I—" "You what?! You've gotta, you're the one who knows how this all works!" "Yeah, well, y'know how they are about respect 'n'all? Think me late-by-five cubed and you'll start to get an idea o'why." "And how do you think they'll take me canceling literally last-second 'cause I don't know squat about the technical side! What could possibly be so big it's worse than [i]that[/i]?" "Okay, so y'know how my side job 'til this takes off is house-painting, right?" "How could I [i]possibly[/i] forget?" "You're never gonna let that go, are you?" "I spent hours on that hat! [i]Hours![/i] To see it [i]desecrated[/i] like that was— okay, rushing, rant later, continue." "Right, and y'know how I had to replace my washer after some unspecified wastrel broke it?" "And [i]you're[/i] never going to let [i]that[/i] go, are you? Touché." "Indeed. Well, after I got it yesterday I tossed in my ratty old tie-dye work duds as a test, and it [i]seemed[/i] fine. But when I pulled out my suit today... well, y'know how stains can run in the wash, right?" "So what, some paint stained your suit cross-loads? That's bad, but not nearly as bad as a no-show." "No, it's way worse. You'll have to see to believe." "So show me, 'cause I can't imagine [i]how[/i]. You can be here in eight, right?" "I can sprint it in four if I get lucky on the crossings, so maybe if I dress super-fast, but it's still a terrible idea." "Okay, remember how we agreed I'm going to take lead this project? I'm cashing in." "Ugh.... [i]Fine[/i], but I told you so." "Oh, don't be so fatalistic. It can't be [i]that[/i] bad." [hr] "So, as the leader on this current venture, I suppose it would be meet for me to cop to my mistakes." "..." "So in retrospect, I'm willing to admit that it may, in fact, have actually been that bad." "..." "So therefore I should take from this a valuable lesson about listening to your opinion and respecting your judgment on these matters." "..." "Look, I'm trying to apologize and I bought you drinks, could you stop glaring at me? Please?" "No." "Like, [i]three[/i] drinks. Big ones. Could you at least turn it down to 'somewhat annoyed' instead of 'baleful wrath of a vengeful deity'?" "Fine. In a minute. Right now my mortified anger is all that's keeping me from collapsing into a singularity of humiliated despair." "I suppose that's better than nothing. Uh, I mean the—" "You mean than the nothing we've left after that, pardon my French, [i]désastre complet[/i] of a demo?" "Wait, you speak French? Since when?" "No. I mean, did you [i]see[/i] the looks they gave me? That whole half-hour was a charade 'cause they made up their minds the instant I walked in." "Hey, that guy in the back seemed like he was—" "And everyone on the street! Did you [i]see[/i] the stares?" "You [i]are[/i] pretty eye-catching right now." "'Eye-catching'? Yeah, that's [i]totally[/i] equivalent to 'wearing the most hideously tacky suit ever to disgrace existence because you forced me to leave the house in it!'" "Hey there, be fair! For a hideously tacky tie-dye two-piece, it's surprisingly fashionable." "..." "Or is that a three-piece? I don't remember and it's hard to tell now." "..." "And I'm pretty sure your minute's up. You're supposed to be on bargaining." "...I think I'ma just skip to depression instead. What'm I supposed t'do? I can't show to a job interview like [i]this[/i], and there's no way I can afford replacing all my clothes after spending so much on the washer." "Wait. [i]All[/i] your clothes are tie-dye now?" "[i]Yes![/i] Looking into my closet is like rainbows are exploding out of my eyes in the worst way possible." "So, you have a washer that can magically turn [i]anything[/i] tie-dye... I just might have an idea for how to salvage this." [hr] "Oh, thank you ever-so-much for taking these horrible shirts off my hands! Why, I could not even [i]pay[/i] my customers to leave with them, so for somebody to take them for free, why it fills me with happiness! How-ever can I hope to express my gratitude?" "Think nothing of it, my good man, we're just doing our part. If you should ever happen across any more unsalable clothing, just let us know."