I rang the doorbell to the apartment, 5D, and waited patiently holding a pizza in my hand. They don’t deliver themselves, you know.

“Hold on, I’m coming,” a Brooklyn-accented voice called out from behind the door. Various shuffling sounds occur from behind the door when I heard the deadbolt unfasten. The doorknob turned, opening the door and revealing a thousand pound grizzly bear with glasses.

The bear adjusted his glasses. “Yes?”

I nod and present the pizza. “You order a large with pepper and onions?”

“Is the pizza for Jonah Goldstein?”

I look at the receipt and confirm that, yes, it is indeed for a Jonah Goldstein.

Jonah clapped his claws. “Wonderful!” he said as he took the pizza from me. He walked away. “You’ll have to excuse me while I get my wallet.”

“Okay, Mr. Goldstein.”

He chuckled softly. “Call me Jonah.”

I mentally filed that away as Jonah lumbered away. I soon heard the sounds of things being rearranged and muffled groans.

“Where did I put this stupid… ah, here we are!”

Claws scraping against finished wood and pronounced thuds foretold his arrival as he returned to the door, wallet in… claw, I guess.

Jonah rifled through his wallet. “Now, how much was the pizza?”

“Twenty dollars and fifty-two cents, Jonah.”

Jonah hummed. “Good, you’re a smart kid.” He pulled out a twenty and a fiver and handed them to me. “Keep the change. You earned it.”

I nodded. “Thank you, have a nice day.” I was about to leave, but something compelled me to make the next statement. “You know, I grew up next to a bear.”

The bear adjusted his glasses. “Oh, really? Who?” He peered into my face. “Maybe I might know them.”

I scrolled through my mental rolodex. “Um, hmm… Jones, I think?”

Jonah rubbed his chin. “Jones, Jones… perhaps Alan Jones?” He raised an eyebrow. “Used to be an accountant?”

I shrugged my shoulders. “Dunno. I was just a kid.”

Jonah seemed crestfallen. “You know, Alan and I grew up in the same neighborhood. Last I heard he ended up on some governor’s mantelpiece after he got convicted of multiple felonies.” He roughly patted me on the shoulder. “But that won’t happen to a good kid like you, right?”

“I’m also human.”

“That you are,” Jonah said after clucking his tongue. “Well, I’m sure you’ll do fine. Goodnight, kid.”

“Goodnight, Jonah,” I said before he shut his door. I exited the apartment building and drove off to the pizzeria. 

I couldn't bear to be late getting back.