[i]“It’s only fun till somebody dies, then it’s a fun-er-al!”[/i] “LUNA!” “What?” “What in blazes is being blared through your headset?” “Headset? I—Oh, how long has that been there?” “Luna, you didn’t notice you were wearing a headset?” “I’ve been scavenging around Canterlot for quite some time now, sister. The peas—great town folk have been watching me graze for new items!” “Luna, are you stealing from ponies?” “[i]Stealing[/i]? Sister, thy tongue does not correlate with our merriment! Dost thou think of us as a petty thief?” “No, but whenever you interact with ponies, I have to assume the worst.” “Why is that, dear sister?” “Because it is a natural reaction for someone who booted you to the moon with their hooves.” “Sister, thy power is strong, but your hooves are mere meager utensils; they do not have the strength to shove my—” “Profound buttox?” “SISTER! Our gluteus maximus is glutton free!” “Pfft—Lulu, do not lie. You chow down on more than enough junk food.” “I—cannot deny that claim.” “...” “Sister, laughing does not suit you. You sound like a dying horse.” “Luna, I hate to break it to you, but we are horses.” “No, sister, we are ponies. And why are you calling us [i]that[/i] derogatory word?” “No, we are horses. We’re just not dead, because that wouldn’t be fun, would it?” [i]“It’s only fun till somebody dies, then it’s a fun-er-al!”[/i] “Oh, there it is again, Celly.” “Luna, turn that off.” “But I just scavenged it from—” “Luna, you stole it and—” “I did not steal from anypony, dear sister. I scavenged it!” “‘Scavenged’.” “Exactly! Oh, and sister, ponies don’t have claws, so you doing air quotes with your hooves makes you look like you’re wooing a ghost.” “...” “Why are you laughing at my deadly insult?” “...” “Sister, be careful. I do not want to pay for your medical bill.” “Ahh—oh, Luna, never [i]ever[/i] be a comedian. You’re going to brutally murder the audience with your dry humor.” “Dry? To the [i]bone[/i]?” “Stop, s-seriously!” “Okay, okay, Celly, I’ll stop. Now, where were we?” “I was confronting you about your headset—” “I was not stealing!” “Luna, based on your previous infractions I couldn’t help but come to that conclusion! Remember, I have to assume the worst like if you somehow died by an assassin whose paycheck weighs on killing you because you took his ten bits. Not only would I be sad, but I wouldn’t be able to stop him until two days after the exchange had happened.” “I wouldn’t die—wait, why two days?” “Isn’t that the standard?” “...” “Luna? I don’t know why you’re laughing.” “T-Thou thinks there’s a time stamp on death? What are thee, Death herself?!” “Quiet, nave.” “Nave? Sister, the language of the dead is my claim to fame!” “Exactly.” “Why…? Oh I hate when you do that.” “That’s what you get for stealing.” “I was not stealing, sister!” “Prove it, then.” “Pardon?” “Prove that you did not steal from anypony.” “Oh? Wait here then, Fun Killer!” “Fun Killer?” “...” “Oh, she teleported. Well I might as well—” “...” “That was quick. Now, who is he?” “His name is—” “Black Death, Princess Celestia.” “Luna, why did you bring a plague into our throne room?” “Celestia! I did not think you would—” “Do not worry, Princess Luna. I get that sometimes.” “Death, that doesn’t mean she can—” “It’s fine. Let her get the bad joke out of her system.” “Bad—Oh for crying out loud, sister! Stop laughing your lungs out!” “I-It’s just, you’ve made death seem so funny that I c-can’t—Black D-Death!” “We’ll be here for a while, won’t we, Princess Luna?” “...” “Celestia stop this madness right now! I still have to prove that I did not steal!” “O-Oh! Okay! I’m done. Let’s hear it, Luna.” “Thank you, Fun Killer. Now, Black Death—” “Pfft—” “[i]Sister[/i].” “Sorry!” “Thank you. Now, Death, tell Celestia that I did not steal from you.” “She did not steal from me, Princess—” “Ha! See, he said that I—” “—only purchased the headset for her new console.” “What.” “Celly, I can explain—” “She came to my shop today, Princess Celestia. I told her she could scavenge through my collection of high quality headsets. She said she wanted that specific headset, so I allowed her to have it under one condition.” “And what was that condition?” “Listen to—” [i]“It’s only fun till somebody dies—”[/i] “—for an entire week.” “Are you kidding me, Luna?” “No, I’m not.” “...” “Let me get the shovel, Death.”