[right][i]❉ Super Trampoline gewidmet, in Dankbarkeit. ❉[/i][/right] [b]Act one, scene one: Bonbon, Lyra[/b] [i]Whistling, Bonbon pads into the house. She closes the door carefully.[/i] Bonbon: Lyra? [i]She looks around, waits for an answer, but there is none.[/i] Bonbon: Lyra! Where are you? [i]She listens attentively. After a few seconds, a faint clicking sound can be heard.[/i] Bonbon [i](sighs, ears flopping)[/i]: Oh no… [i]She thumps to the door of the bedroom and flings it open. Lyra is lying on the bed, typing on a laptop computer.[/i] Bonbon: LYRA! What are you doing? [i]Startled, Lyra precipitately closes the computer’s lid.[/i] Lyra: Oh! Hi sweetie! Err… Nothing. [i]Slightly flushing, Lyra smiles awkwardly at Bonbon.[/i] Bonbon: My hoof! Don’t tell me you’ve taken to visiting those dating websites for humans again? Lyra [i](facehoofs)[/i]: Don’t be ridiculous, sug’! It was such a crazy experience… Bonbon [i](shrugs)[/i]: Whose fault? Lyra: Okay, maybe I just went a [i]teensy-weensy[/i] bit too far with my profile picture? Bonbon: I told you it wasn’t a good idea to pick that – err… girl – what was her name? Lyra: Pamela Anderson. Bonbon: And [i]nude[/i] at that! Lyra [i](arches an eyebrow)[/i]: So what? Do [i]we[/i] clothe? Bonbon: Of course not! But we ponies are a superior species. Lyra: I swear I simply looked up images tagged “horny humans” on Poodle! Bonbon [i](surprised)[/i]: What’s [i]Poodle?[/i] Lyra [i](rolls her eyes)[/i]: An up to sniff search engine, [i]www.k9.dog.[/i] Bonbon [i](puzzled)[/i]: And why the hay did you have to specify ‘horny’? Lyra [i](shrugs)[/i]: You’re not a unicorn, you cannot understand. I regret nothing. Bonbon [i](peeved)[/i]: Pfff… So what’s your hugger-mugger business with that computer? Lyra [i](sighs)[/i]: All right, all right. I was writing a fiction for a contest. Bonbon: What!? [i]Lyra reopens the computer’s lid, shifts on the bed and magically turns the computer so that the screen faces Bonbon.[/i] Lyra: Take a gander. Bonbon [i](squints)[/i]: Err… [i]This time, the contest was fraught with unbearable tension. Would Titanium Dragon, who had vanished from the face of the earth three weeks ago, eventually reappear? The suspense was overwhelming.[/i] Lyra: What do you think of it? Bonbon: Charming but not very specific. I don’t think you’ll ever earn a prize with such a prose. What is it about? Lyra: The prompt is [i]I regret nothing[/i]. Since I wasn’t that thrilled about it, I went for a “meta-fic”. Bonbon [i](perplexed)[/i]: Who is that [i]Titanium Dragon[/i] you write about? Lyra: The gist of the contest is anonymity. Everypony picks a nickname, though. It’s a funny game trying to guess who’s hiding behind each one. Bonbon [i](smiling)[/i]: Show me! Show me! Oh! [i]Titanium Dragon[/i]… that’s an obvious one. Who’s next? [i]Present Perfect?[/i] Lyra: A wild shot? Bonbon [i](ponders, then shakes her head)[/i]: No. Beats me… Lyra: That’s Rarity. Bonbon: Uh!? Why? Lyra: It’s a pun on her ‘perfect presentation’. Bonbon [i](rolls her eyes)[/i]: [i]Super Trampoline…[/i] Now who can that be? Lyra: Come on, don’t pretend to be dumber than you are! Who keeps bumping around all day long? Bonbon: Okay I see now! I think I’m cottoning on to that game. [i](She presses the down-arrow key to scroll the screen down.) Cerulean voice[/i]… Must be a singer… Err… Fluttershy! Lyra: Well done, honey! Bonbon [i](beams)[/i]: Hmmm… Lemme see. [i]Trick Question?[/i] Lyra: This one is more difficult. Bonbon [i](hums and haws)[/i]: Trixie? Lyra: I don’t think so. Well, it’s true she says she lives in the boondocks. At first, I thought about AppleJack. But she also claims she teaches at Equestria university in Canterlot, and she writes a bunch about fancy science. I’m not sure, but I think it’s Princess Sparkle herself. Bonbon [i](gasps)[/i]: Gee! [i]Princess Sparkle![/i] Even the royalty’s keen on your contest? [i]Spectral[/i]… got it! Rainbow Dash! [i](Pauses.)[/i] But, by the way, what’s [i]your[/i] nickname? Lyra [i](points her hoof at the screen)[/i]: Here. Bonbon [i](pulls a dubious face)[/i]: Now can you tell me what the hay does that mean? Lyra: Nothing particular. No more than [i]M1Garand8[/i] or [i]Waterpear[/i]. Bonbon: Agreed, but it sounds cr— Lyra [i](Cuts Bonbon off. Huffily)[/i]: All right, enough yackety-yaking. I’ve two hours to submit my fiction, so I’d rather get cracking. [i](She gets off the bed, walks to Bonbon and pushes her towards the exit.)[/i] Good bye! [i](She slams the door of the bedroom shut.)[/i] Bonbon [i](dazed, slowly pulls herself together. Then yells)[/i]: GOOD LUCK, “COLD IN GARDEZ”!