Pinkie Pie’s Pocket Pamphlet to being hap-P

Entry #57 Getting up with Glee! For the Non-early Bird

Many ponies have asked me if i'm an early bird or a night owl. I don't know what all the fuss is about. I just don't see how I can be a bird… I don't even fly! Well, actually, I did invent a flying copter-pedal-machine (CPM for short) that a Griffon that I should not name smashed. 

Anyways, all I'm saying is that you don't need wings to let your spirit soar. The sky's the limit when it comes to these things. Trust me, there is more than one way to Soar! Soar! Soar!

It first starts with becoming an early bird. (If you want, you can skip to entry 319, that shows you how to make wings out of paper mache! Unfortunately though, you need a powerful unicorn’s enchantment to fly. Adult supervision required when handling scissors).

Now, most ponies start off their days with a snoring, boring, zombified, crombified routine. They get up, whap that alarm clock, make a grumpy face and grumble while stomping their hooves to face another snoring boring day.

Now, why would anypony want to do something like that?

First start your mornings with something that makes you gain ear to ear! (If you can stretch your smile farther, let me know. I've been trying to stretch it farther for years). Do something like do a backflip while thanking Mr. Alarm clock for waking you up to a fantastic and fun filled day, (hopefully fun filled like a jelly donut).

Kiss your pet alligator! Sing “Good morning!” to your younger siblings and drag them out of bed! (Note: do not attempt for any goal under 4 years, little foals need their sleep to grow. See entry 216a for details.) Do something amazing! 

Now, I understand if some of this ‘ain't’ your style. Everypony needs some time to get adjusted. But if there is one thing to try out, give yourself a inspirational speech in front of a mirror! 

It may be a little awkward at first, but try it! Just like a new food, you won't know until you try! 

When you are in a bathroom brushing your teeth, or getting out of the shower, greet the pony in the mirror with a funny face. (If the glass is fogged, you can use shaving cream to clear it up! For more life hacks for clearing mirrors, see Appendix 3.14).

Make the funniest face you can! Stick out your tongue! Blow a raspberry! Eat a raspberry! Speak in a raspy voice! When the pony on the other side starts to giggle or grin, you're ready for your day!

Now, if your reflection doesn't even so much as smirk, don't worry. I understand, there are some tough reflections. Trust me, I had to face off a thousand once! But, you have to start small. If your reflection doesn't smile your first time, don't worry. You haven't activated their funny bone yet.

Here is where the inspirational speech comes in. Tell the reflection how you feel, then wait. Wait. Wait. Then point a hoof (or claw, or whatever you can point with) towards your reflection and tell them, ‘Your awesome and I love you!’

Note: said reflection might not be used to this and might shy away awkwardly. Again, if you don't get it your first time, don't worry, they just aren't used to this abstract idea of confidence yet. But eventually, like everything, smiles and confidence are contagious as yawns.

Over time, the early bird inside you will awaken and your spirit will soar! (Entry 319. Paper Mache not included.)

Don't forget to smile often!

-End of Entry 57-

(For Getting ready for beddy-bye for non-night owls, see entry 58).

P.S. sorry, I accidentally spilled a jelly donut here. You can lick some if you like… it might taste a little inky though...