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Illusion of Choice · FiM Minific ·
Organised by RogerDodger
Word limit 400–750
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With a Side of Tomato Sauce
“How would you like to be cooked?” one of the hydra’s heads asked, smiling.

Daring Do tried not to cry. She was a big mare and crying was above her. Still, watching as a hydra argued with itself about what manner in which she was to be eaten while she was bound helpless to do anything about it left little room for anything else.

“I-I don’t wanna be eaten!” she mewled.

“Ah, look at the poor thing!” the middle head stated, sympathizing with his next meal. “She looks terrified!”

“She’s just food, John,” the head furthest to the right stated with a snort. “It’s not like she’ll be terrified for that much longer.”

After nearly half an hour of arguing between the hydra’s various heads, they’d finally come to the consensus that asking their quarry for which manner in which she’d like to be ingested would be the wisest idea. Unfortunately, that mare wasn’t nearly compliant enough.

“I don’t know, Martin. She looks like she’s about to soil herself,” the left-handed head observed. “I don’t know what ponies taste like when they’ve marinated themselves in urine, but it can’t be good.”

“Bah! Stop groaning, you twits!” Martin said.

“B-but she doesn’t look happy about being eaten.” John looked down at the horrified pony, grimacing as she continued to scream. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’d rather eat something that doesn’t talk.”

“Mother always liked you best, didn’t she?” Martin sneered. “Always the sensitive one.”

“HHHHHEEEEEEEEELLLLLPPPPP MMMMMEEEEEEE!!!!”

“Enough of this!” Martin growled, ducking his head down to glare at the pony. “Shut it or I’ll roast you!”

“O-okay,” Daring Do said, sniffling a little.

“Anyways, how would you like to be eaten?”

“I-I don’t want to be eaten,” Daring Do said.

“Well you don’t get that choice, now do you?” Martin stated. “It’s not like many hydras are willing to give up their quarry once they’ve already caught it. How else should we feed our families?”

“I guess you have a point.”

“Excellent reasoning!" Martin encouraged. "So tell me, if you were a hydra and wanted to make a delicious meal out of your prey, how would you like to prepare it?”

Daring Do paused to think about it. How would she like to be eaten? It was a legitimate question, after all.

“With a side of tomato sauce,” she responded, already dreading her answer.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how Poneigh a la Tomat came to be.
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